


Draco Malfoy's Story

by blanchepottermalfoy



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Drama, M/M, Post-Deathly Hallows, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-30
Updated: 2017-09-17
Packaged: 2018-12-21 20:18:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 49,623
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11951862
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blanchepottermalfoy/pseuds/blanchepottermalfoy
Summary: Draco was never the same after the war. Destiny puts Harry on his path again. How will they cope with each other this time, especially now that Draco can no longer deny his feelings for him?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story was previously posted on ff.net in Portuguese and it is complete. I have started translating it to English, but I am revising it and it might take a little longer to be completed in English. So please bear with me as the process is going slower than I would like to due to real life... I do hope you like it, though. It was born out of my disgust with Deathly Hallows' stupid epilogue.

The noisy crowd surrounding me was horrifying for the man of such delicate nerves I have become, but I was prepared to endure it till the end for the sake of Scorpius, my precious son. It would be his first year away from the safety of Malfoy Manor and my watchful eyes. Most importantly, it would be his first year at Hogwarts. He would begin a new phase in his life; one that I hoped would be happier and more successful than mine.

I had not been exactly unhappy at school. Only in my Sixth Year had I really began to realise the chaos of it all and what it was really like to be scared to death. Only then had I really felt what it was like to feel guilty and despair, lost and undone.  

My last two years at Hogwarts had turned me into what I was today: a man full of insecurities and regrets. A man who fought constantly against sudden panic over nothing at all. The ghost of a man. I had long lost life’s small pleasures. Nineteen years later and I remained the same frightened boy that had done so many stupid things and made so many stupid mistakes in my adolescence.

I was now on medication. I took them every freaking day. I tried rejecting professional help for a long time until there was no way around it anymore. I had been in therapy for almost ten years with little progress. But at least I had managed to face London with all its pollution and uproar, and those damn murderous four-wheeled machines. And all those frigging muggles…

Don’t get me wrong. I do not hate muggles as I did before. I just think they are destroying our world in that mad attempt of replacing magic for what they called technology. That same technology that was now everywhere. I could see it that very instant on Platform Nine 3/4. Several witches and wizards with tiny mobile phones, listening to music, taking pictures of everything and everyone, filming every little bit of their lives. Most of them also had enchanted cars.

These were really different times. The wizarding world loved the muggle world. But I wasn’t there to analyse life around me. I was there to give my full support to Scorpius, who was holding my hand tightly. Next to me, Astoria, my wife, looked as nervous as he was.

Her fear was justifiable. The Malfoy family did not have the same prestige as before, quite the contrary. Ever since the war, despite our last minute desertion, we had been labelled as Death Eaters, and we would forever be Death Eaters. People stared and whispered as we walked by. Some were openly aggressive. The wizarding world hated those of pureblood now, especially those who had supported the Dark Lord, and they loved those that were born of muggle parents. 

Astoria and I were afraid of what could happen to Scorpius in Hogwarts. My only consolation was that my son was nothing like me. Physically he was my carbon copy; the same hair colour and eyes, the same radiant beauty. But while I had been spoiled and conceited just to hide my deep insecurities, Scorpius was the exact opposite. He was an adorable and charming kid. He knew how to be proud without being arrogant. He was a natural born aristocrat but without being irritating and haughty. He was my pride and joy and I would do anything for the one who had become my reason for living. I loved Scorpius more than anyone in the world, and I would curse whoever dared to cause him harm.

I knew Scorpius would be a brilliant student, but I was afraid of him being bullied. A bitter smile threatened to escape my lips. If that happened, it would be my fault. After all, I had been an insufferable git to many students in Hogwarts.

The main target of my injustices was only a few feet away, and my heart beat faster as it felt him near me. My eyes searched for him instinctively, but it was best to hold my urges. It wasn’t the time.

I looked at Scorpius and gave him a warm smile for the first time that morning. My son relaxed a little bit. I felt even guiltier for making him worry so much. What a lousy father I was.

“How do you feel?” I asked.

“I’m ok,” he answered, and he seemed to be telling the truth.

I felt less anxious. Astoria, on the other hand, remained restless. She knelt down to button up Scorpius’ heavy coat. I rolled my eyes, but didn’t complain. Firstly, because we were in public. Secondly, because I was as protective as she was.

“Remember what I told you,” I said.

Scorpius just nodded.

“Do your homework, but find some time to have fun. No wandering around the castle at night, let alone the Forbidden Forest. And above all, if somebody bullies you, go straight to the Headmistress. Got it?’

‘Got it,’ he answered right away.

Scorpius stared at me with the same adoration and trust I had stared at my own father when I was a child. My heart was filled with sadness. What I really wanted was to take Scorpius back home and hide him from that wicked world. I wondered if my father had had the same thoughts about me when I first went to Hogwarts. Probably not. I knew my father loved and cared for me, but to Lucius being a powerful man came first. Any type of weakness was not allowed. It was damn ironic, actually, since our own weaknesses had been our downfall in the past. The proud Malfoys in the end did care for one another.

Although Lucius had become a little more humble over the years, if one could call him that at all, I knew he was still disappointed in me. I had failed to become the Dark Lord’s favourite minion. I had been unable to look at that creature’s face without feeling extreme repulse. I had not become the best Seeker, neither the best student. I hadn’t become anything at all.

Knowing my father I knew he expected Scorpius to succeed where I had failed. However, I did not expect the same of my son. All I wanted was for him to have fun and be happy. It didn’t matter if he wasn’t the Seeker of the year. I didn’t ever care if didn’t make it into the team. What I really wanted was for him not to feel the weight of being a Malfoy.

The train whistled. It was ready to leave. The gibbering around me increased. The happiness, the loud laughter and the farewells let me slightly dizzy. I hated crowds, but I would endure it all for Scorpius.

Astoria touched my arm as if to support me. I shrugged. I didn’t want to look weak in any way. I was Draco Malfoy. I could be a coward on the inside, but outside I would always be a Malfoy.

I hugged Scorpius for the last time without caring about what the others would think. All I wanted was for my son to know that he could count on me no matter what.

‘Behave yourself, alright?’ I muttered against his ear. ‘But have your revenge if you must.’

I winked and he laughed, as if I didn’t know already that he could defend himself very well. Scorpius might look fragile but he was a smart child. Besides, I had taught him a few tricks weeks ago.

Astoria looked at me as if I was a lost cause. There was a reasonable explanation for that. My wife hated violence. She didn’t want Scorpius to get in trouble. She was of the idea that Scorpius should report whatever was wrong to McGonagall instead of doing justice with his bare hands. I agreed with her, but what she couldn’t understand was that sometimes a boy had to learn how to defend himself on his own.

Am I being a hypocrite? Maybe. But every father hopes that his son will fend for himself. At least in that matter I could relate to Lucius.

Astoria hugged Scorpius and I saw her eyes filled with tears. She was actually managing to hold herself together really well. I smiled as I saw Scorpius quickly escape from her arms. He was, after all, a preteen. It did not look good to have his mother hugging him like he was a little baby.

I winked at him one more time and felt something squeeze hard around my heart as I saw him disappear inside the train. I prayed for the gods to protect him. I could almost hear Astoria’s heart breaking into tiny little pieces. I wanted to hold her, but I was never the type to display affection. So I gave her my arm, and she took it. We turned to leave and my eyes found a pair of emerald-green ones staring straight at me for the second time that day.

Harry Potter.

Until that moment, I had managed to ignore him successfully. I had been able to nod in his direction just to let him know I had seen him. It hadn’t been that difficult. With so many fears haunting me that day, it had been easy to forget about him. I had other things to worry about.

But there he was one more time, the jet-black hair tousled by the wind, his green eyes sparkling like jewellery, his semi-open mouth an invitation to sin. He was such an attractive man, the hero of the wizarding world. His loyal wife, Ginny Weasley, stood by his side. Hermione Granger Weasley and Ronald Weasley were also there, and so were the other Weasleys, but I barely noticed them. My eyes were set on Harry as usual.

My heart, which until then had been hurting because of Scorpius’ departure to Hogwarts, now seemed to be ready to come out of my mouth and bounce all around the platform. It beat so erratically that I was afraid that Potter might hear it. Our eyes met briefly but intensely. I was so caught up in the moment I didn’t hear Astoria calling me. It took me awhile to answer her in fact.

‘Draco, are you alright?’ she asked, alternating her stare from me to Harry.

I sighed. Astoria was one of the only people in the whole world who knew about my sordid little secret. She honestly worried about me. I wished I could love her more than anything.

‘I’m fine,’ I answered after some time to appease her mind. ‘Let’s go home.’

I looked at Harry and his noisy and incredibly happy family for one last time. I hated Ginny Weasley for holding him in front of everybody without any shame whatsoever. I think my waves of hatred travelled to where they were because Harry stared at me again and raised a brow in my direction. I could not tell if he meant that as a farewell greeting or something else. I just returned it with another nod. 

We weren’t enemies anymore. Then again, we were not friends. We were nothing but two men who had spent their whole lives hating each other. Two men who had meddled in each other’s paths, granted, I more than him. And dammit. He had saved my life. 

I loved him like never before… The feeling was so strong that it had made me sick.

It was pathetic. I was pathetic.

So I left the station to take refuge against the world in my home sweet home. 

 


	2. Chapter 2

My first week without Scorpius went by slowly. My mother wrote me from France, her new home for seven years now. Father was alright. He had been going to a lot of museums and cafés, which was totally strange. Mother spent her afternoons drinking tea with her French friends – and what surprised me the most was that some of them were Muggles. She sent Scorpius her best and hoped to see us at Christmas.

Scorpius also sent me a letter. We had promised to keep in touch at least once a week. He seemed happy, which made me feel quite relieved. He thanked us for the sweets and biscuits sent by Astoria, and for the Potions book sent by me. Scorpius loved potions. I expected him to be as good as Severus had been on the subject. He was certainly talented.

I put the mail back on the silver tray and took a sip of my tea with milk. I wasn’t hungry, which was completely normal. I rarely felt hungry. Astoria usually made me eat something. She always said I looked too thin and weak. My once shiny silky hair was now so dull it drove me insane. I was also becoming paler if that was even possible. I hated to look at myself in the mirror and face that fragile being that was once so proud and handsome. I had to remind myself every day that I had to be strong and withstand everything for Scorpius. My life basically revolved around my son.

I took my pills hoping to feel better. Even though the family Healer had prescribed me something stronger, I refused to take it. I was sick and needed help, but I wanted to keep the illusion that I could fight it all with my own strength. If the medicine was stronger, than what would be my merit in getting better?

I began to flick through the Daily Prophet and froze for a moment as I saw Harry’s picture. I sighed. He had received another prize. How many had it been that year? At least ten, I thought. I wonder if they never got tired of praising him. It was a dumb question really. If I couldn’t resist him, the rest of the world had no chance but surrender to Harry’s greatness.

Astoria came and sat next to me and let me know how happy she was that her begonias were growing healthily. She loved spending time in the garden. It was her favourite hobby, even if it made my mother snort. According to my mum, Astoria was not appropriate for me because she was not a typical rich witch. On the contrary, Astoria kept herself busy. Even though she didn’t work – because that would be the death of my family and hers – she spent a lot of time in our beautiful greenhouse in the backyard. She found it entertaining to dive her delicate hands in the dirt. It made my mother horrified, and I loved Astoria for that.

We loved each other in our own way. I knew she wished we were a real passionate couple, but for her it was enough that we cared for each other. Astoria might look like a typical bourgeois witch at first with her golden hair and doll face. She came from a traditional rich wizarding family, something that had been essential for our wedding. But whoever knew her intimately would realise how sweet and tender she really was. She took care of me and she was an excellent mother.

We were good friends. The silence between us was rather welcome. For an outsider it might be strange. At first sight we looked like a soulless couple, but it was not true at all.  
“Draco, honey, have you eaten?” she asked taking her eyes off her weekly witch gardening magazine for a moment.

I smiled and lied, “I ate a toast.”

She smiled back. “Great. It’s better than nothing.”

I didn’t have the courage to tell her the truth thus disappointing her. I kept reading the newspaper instead. I frowned as I read about a gang of teenage wizards who were terrorising Muggles in London. A pub had been vandalised and some Muggles had had their memories erased. Nothing serious had happened but the Ministry was concerned – as they well should. The group named themselves The Death Gang and wanted the pure bloods back in power. Obviously, they hated Muggles.  
I felt chills down my spine at how familiar that was.

I put the newspaper aside when I got to the sports page. The first column was Ginny Weasley’s. She was good, I had to admit. But I couldn’t stand her. She was so perfect it made me nauseated.

I closed my eyes and tried not to think of Harry, but that was as impossible as stop breathing. I let my feelings overtake me. You see, twenty years ago I had no idea that all that hatred was in fact love. I had hated Harry Potter more than anything. And then, when my health had started to deteriorate and I had to look for professional help, the bastard made me realise that I actually loved Harry.

It had been quite a shock. I got worse and worse. Later, when I finally came to terms with it, I admitted to myself that it was true. Astoria’s support was extremely important.  
At least I wasn’t so obsessed anymore. There were days and days. Like that day on Platform Nine ¾. That day had been a really bad one. Not only did I have to deal with Harry’s presence, but also Scorpius’ departure. When I arrived at the Mansion I was a nervous wreck. Astoria almost sent for our Healer. Eventually, though, I got better and felt proud of myself for my strong will.

For the thousandth time, I told myself that Harry Potter was an illusion and that he never, not in a million years, would be mine. If he knew how I felt even after all those years he would laugh at my face and then send me to hell.

It was hard to predict. The Harry Potter from the present was so different. He was a lot manlier, a lot more mature. The few times we had met each other, he had treated me with polite coldness, and not at all aggressively. Our brief encounters always left me shaky and sick, because I hated the courteous Harry Potter.

I would give anything to have the old Harry Potter back - the one who was distrustful and emotional and whose green eyes sparkled with fury. At least back then he acknowledged my existence. Nowadays he didn’t seem to care about my presence in the world at all.

Who could blame him? I had been an insufferable git. I had been selfish and spoiled – a real brat.

Had I changed? I made a face as the answer to that was obvious enough. No, I had not.

“Are you feeling all right?” asked Astoria with a worried look.

I had forgotten about her for a second. I opened my eyes and nodded.

“Yes, I’m fine. It’s nothing really, just a slight pain.”

“Perhaps we should go inside. It’s too windy today,” she suggested.

We were in the gazebo of the Mansion, my favourite place. I didn’t want to leave so early. The place brought me peace of mind. It was surrounded by plants and ancient gnarled trees. My four German Sheppard dogs ran around in search for gnomes and barked happily when they found some. Athos, Porthos, Aramis and D’artagnan were their names, my four musketeers. I adored them. I whistled to call their attention and they followed me back to the Mansion.

I decided to read a book, thinking that it would distract me. Sweet illusion. I kept thinking about what Harry might be doing and with whom. I pictured him with Ginny Weasley living an idyllic domestic scene. I felt like throwing up at once.

I took a shower and felt weak. I decided to make an effort to eat at dinner. I needed the energy.

As we ate, Astoria told me the last news about our wizarding elite. My wife was used to tending to the meetings of their Wizarding Club, a place for rich pure bloods who still thought of themselves as better than the rest. She complained but I knew she had fun in there. I thought those meetings were a waste of time, but Astoria always had funny stories to tell me about the nonsense that went around. I was curious about what she had to tell me now.

“They’ve asked Harry Potter to make a speech next week,” she said casually.

I almost spilt the wine on the table. It didn’t make sense that they would ask Harry to go there. The Wizarding Club barely tolerated him for whom he was, and I knew really well what they really thought of the hero of the wizarding world. Harry was not a pure blood in their opinion since his mother had been a mudblood. People like Harry were still intolerable for the true wizarding elite.

But what did I know? Things had been changing so fast.

“Why don’t you come with me on Saturday?” Astoria asked.

Her question seemed innocent, but by the sparkle in her pretty eyes I knew she was up to something.

“What’s he going to talk about?”

“It’s about his foundation for orphan boys and girls that he started after the war. It seems to me that there is this gang of teenage wizards on the streets of London who are sons and grandsons of ex-Death Eaters, and he plans to insert them in his project. Matilda Junian has shown interest in the matter.”

I frowned. I could not picture a person such as the old Matilda Junian to be interested in that. She was the last person who would open up the doors of her precious club of snobs to somebody she despised. Matilda was a short and pudgy woman who had married one of the richest and most influential wizards in England. Her husband had been one of the Dark Lord’s main supporters during the first war. He was long dead, a victim of some strange food poisoning. Ever since then Matilda took care of everything in his place. Anybody who was somebody in the wizarding world never made a decision without consulting her first. The old hag loved nothing more than to meddle into other people’s affairs whether they let her or not.

She did try to tame Harry Potter and the Weasleys. I confess it had been fun to see her fruitless efforts go down the drain. Harry Potter refused to treat her as a goddess, so Matilda detested him. And that’s why I found Harry’s visit to her club an anomaly, to say the least.

Harry’s intention, however, was noble. It would be interesting to go back to the club at least that once to see him. I’d seen Harry making speeches before. Every word that came out of his mouth was full of passion. He adored everything he did and I loved him for that.

“Okay. I’ll go with you. I guess it’ll be fun to see that bunch of flatterers making an extreme effort to please Matilda while they try to hide how much they loathe having Potter around.”

Astoria giggled quietly. “I have no doubts about that, Draco, dear. You know, I’ve been thinking,” she continued after a pause, “Why don’t you...”

“Go to bed early?” I cut across her before she could say something to upset me. “Great idea, darling. I’m really tired.”

She leaned back on the chair and gave a heavy sigh. A second later she smiled sadly at me.

“Of course,” was all that she said.

I stood up to place a soft kiss on her forehead. Then I went to my private chamber. I knew what Astoria wanted, but I would never do it. I would never confess my feelings for Harry. Astoria had this romantic notion that everything would be finally settled and solved once I declared my undying love for him. Women could be so innocent.

I closed the door and leaned on it for a few minutes. I clenched my fists. What I needed was to get rid of my feelings for Potter, and fast, or I would end up dying of an unrequited love, and how pathetic would that be?

I lay down after taking a sleeping potion. I wanted a dreamless sleep. Thank Merlin, that’s what I did.


	3. Chapter 3

 

The big auditorium of the Junian Manor was crowded. On the stage, Matilda Junian asked for silence. Then she started with the same old rigmarole. Her words sounded a bit cynical when she introduced Harry, and I wondered if he noticed anything. What was he thinking when he accepted to get into the snake’s lair?

Under curious applauses, Harry Potter entered the stage wearing an elegant custom made robe with a green pullover underneath it which matched his eyes perfectly, and a Gryffindor tie. The last item was clearly a provocation; after all, the Club was for ex-Slytherin students only. I smiled as I saw the mischief in his eyes. I have to confess that I didn’t pay much attention to the speech itself. I couldn’t keep my eyes off of Harry. I wanted to take my sweet time admiring his handsome figure, his green eyes which shone brighter at each word he spoke, the rebel hair he had tried to tame unsuccessfully, the lips that moved so sensually and finally the sound of his voice which wrapped around me like a love potion. Our eyes met a dozen times. Each and every time I felt my heart beat faster and my face heat up. At every glance I felt more and more alive. I would love to use Legilimency and get a glimpse of his mind. I knew that Harry had never been very good at Occlumency. Therefore I was sure I’d have no problem to get into his head. Of course, that wouldn’t stop him from cursing me until the next century.

A smile escaped my lips and our eyes met once more. Harry looked at me with curiosity, perhaps wondering what I thought was so funny when the subject he was talking about was so serious. I liked the idea that I could still make him furious. I’d rather have him staring at me crossly than with his usual indifference.

His speech went on for a little more than half an hour. The clapping was minimal and Harry didn’t look very happy with the general lack of enthusiasm. The fact that he was innocent enough to think that he could soften those hearts of stone made me want to jump on to the stage and kiss him. Despite everything, Matilda was of the opinion that everything Harry said had been wonderful, and she promised to donate a large amount of money to his Needy Children Foundation. I couldn’t understand why Harry needed their help in the first place. In normal circumstances, the bastards around him wouldn’t even look at him. They could barely tolerate Harry. And this was exactly what a reporter from The Quibbler – whose editor now was Luna Lovegood, Harry’s lifelong devotee – asked him.

I got a little closer in order to listen to Harry’s answer, and I had fun watching the thunderstruck look of some of the wizards and witches who had heard the impertinent question. “What we want is for everybody in our community to get together and help,” Harry began, “especially now that our youth delinquency has increased. I believe we are all at fault here. These kids wouldn’t have turned to crime if we had paid better attention to their needs.” I was so close now that I could smell citrus and sandalwood, Harry’s familiar scent. “The fact that these boys and girls are children and grandchildren of ex-Death Eaters only makes matters worse,” Harry continued passionately. “I hope everyone can support our cause!”

“Well, I think it’s very hypocritical of you,” said Ulian Karl, a middle-aged wizard who hadn’t joined the Dark Lord but neither had joined the Order of the Phoenix. Mr. Karl was an example of someone who had always been sitting on the fence. It was quite bizarre to watch him talk to Harry in such a rude manner.

“Hypocritical?” Harry’s voice was angered, but his eyes seemed serene. I got as close as I could. His scent now overtook my whole being.

“That’s right, hypocritical! This Foundation of yours was created twenty years ago and only now you’ve decided to care for these particular children.”

“Mr. Karl, as I was saying before,” Harry started politely but coldly, “I know we’ve failed. You forget, however, that twenty years ago these children hadn’t even been born. And I had truly hoped that a certain part of our wizarding world wouldn’t have turned their backs on their families.”

It was a full front attack. I thought Harry was going to be expelled with hexes, but obviously no one had the courage to treat him like that. They would wait for Harry’s departure before lashing him out and cutting him off the most influential circles. Like Harry would give a damn.

“But of course they wouldn’t be welcomed here!” Mr. Karl exclaimed in outrage. He was really being brave.

“And that just corroborates the idea that some of you gentlemen are also being hypocritical, isn’t that right?” Harry attacked, referring to some wizards and witches who had supported the Dark Lord behind the scenes and that had escaped without being prosecuted.

I was having a lot of fun. Mr. Karl threw dagger-looks at Harry, who just smiled with false innocence. I wondered if Matilda was having second thoughts about letting Harry into her Club of snobs. As I looked at her, however, she seemed completely at ease. I frowned, asking myself what exactly was going through her mind.

In that moment, I decided to be reckless. My magical levels had dropped a lot ever since I got sick. I could perform some simple spells without getting too tired, but complex ones drained me completely. Even so, I decided to use Legilimency with Matilda. I walked towards her and used my charms to call her attention. My eyes found hers, and for a brief instant I could see into her twisted mind. I saw a secret meeting with hooded and masked wizards. Those masks were very similar to the ones the Death Eaters used to wear. I blinked so the spell could be broken. Fortunately, Matilda didn’t notice a thing. I really had become quite good at that kind of magic. My evil aunt Bellatrix had been a marvellous teacher.

I felt my body weakened. I didn’t want anyone to notice, so I excused myself and took refuge in an empty hall. My vision was blurred. I leaned on a marble pillar and was about to let gravity take me down when a pair of strong arms got me before I could fall. If only I could see more clearly. I knew it was Harry because of the perfume, but mainly because of the way my body reacted to his touch. I shivered from pleasure and not pain as he probably must have thought. Next thing I knew he led me to the nearest sofa and knelt down in front of me. He seemed genuinely concerned. My heart softened.

“Malfoy, are you okay? You’re paler than usual,” he said touching my forehead gently with his hand.

I wasn’t a religious man, but if there was a God, then I hoped he could freeze that moment in time. Unfortunately, my brain refused to help me speak. I feared that any sounds coming out of my mouth might seem strange and unintelligible, which would only make me look more pathetic.

“I’m going to call someone,” he said, getting up.

I don’t know how, but my hands grabbed his robes like claws and refused to let him go. It would be hilarious if it wasn’t so tragic. My vision began to go back to normal slowly. The world wasn’t spinning anymore. I looked at Harry, who seemed worried and confused, but also a little bit irritated.

“Malfoy?”

“I’m... better now,” I spoke hoarsely. We stared at each other for what seemed like hours, but were probably just a few seconds. The emerald green eyes sparkled in a strange way.

He finally looked at my hands which were still holding him, and I blushed and let him go. I don’t think I’d ever felt so embarrassed in my whole life. I would be extremely happy if the floor opened up and swallowed me.

“I’m fine,” I repeated, getting up quickly and almost knocking Harry down in the process. I felt like running way, but I was not well at all. Harry caught me in his arms when I stumbled.

“Honestly, Malfoy, you look awful. You’d better sit down.”

“No, I’m all right,” I insisted, avoiding his eyes and trying to escape from him without any success.

“You’re obviously not fine! Would you stop being so stubborn?” He was stronger than me so it was easy to overpower me.

I ended up back on the sofa, sighing irritably.

“I’m going to call your wife.”

“That’s completely unnecessary. I’m serious, Potter. I just need to rest a bit and I’ll be as good as new.”

I’d never be as good as new but he didn’t need to know that.

He crossed his arms, looking as angrily as I was.

“It doesn’t seem like you’re going to. You look like hell.”

“But appearances can be deceiving, Potter,” I said with a smirk. “I thank you for worrying about me, but..."

“I’m not worried,” he cut across me, making my heart bleed.

“Then why don’t you leave me be? Why did you come to my aid?” I retorted.

“It was completely by chance. Besides, I help people no matter who they are. It’s what I do,” he said with a shrug.

I grunted and he sighed.

“Be serious, Malfoy. Are you sure you don’t want me to call anyone?”

“I am, Potter.”

We got quiet for a while. I thought he would leave, but instead he sat next to me. His eyes kept staring at me I could feel it. I felt my face burning. What was he seeing? The brat from the past turned into a delicate and sick man? His old enemy turned to nothing? I clutched my fists. I got mad at myself for not having the courage to turn around and face him.

“Why did you come here today?” I asked. “This is the last place I thought you’d ever come...”

“There are places that are a lot worse than this one, like the Death Valley in Romania or the Giants Mountain, or wherever the Dementors are,” he joked. I smiled a bit, my heart feeling lighter as I noticed his smile. So I finally looked at him. Harry seemed relaxed. His face was serene. However, if you looked closer, you could see that he had bag under his beautiful eyes and he seemed to be tired. “You’ve lost a lot of weight,” he said to my utter surprise.

I sneered even though my heart was beating like crazy. “Is it just me or have you been paying attention to my beautiful self?”

Harry made a face. “It’s impossible not to notice how much you’ve changed...”

I think I blushed, but I pretended I didn’t. “But you’re not worried, remember?”

He laughed. “Definitely not.” It was my turn to make a face.

“By the way, Potter, you’ve gained weight.”

Harry arched his eyebrows as if he couldn’t believe I had just said what I did.

“I’m quite fit, Malfoy! I have to be! It’s part of my job!”

Oh, yes, he was amazingly fit. Even with his body covered with his black robe, I knew that underneath it was the body of a Greek god. Harry was well-built, that much I knew. I had seen him in muggle clothes before. I knew exactly what his robes were hiding. Unfortunately, I couldn’t let him know my real opinion.

“But seriously, Potter, why did you come here?” I insisted. I was being as brave as Mr. Karl. How shocking!

“Did you sleep through my speech by any chance?” he asked, amused.

“Of course not!” I objected indignantly, though I shouldn’t have.

Harry seemed to notice my lapse, but he didn’t say anything, just looked at me with amusement in his eyes.

“If you did hear me speak, then you know why I’ve come here.”

“You don’t need their support.”

“You speak as if you’re not part of their group.”

“I’m not,” I assured him.

He looked at me as if that was hard to believe. My lips curled in a bitter smile. “Astoria, my wife, likes to come to some of their meetings. I hadn’t been here in a while,” I began to explain and instantly berated myself for it. What did it matter anyway?

“So you’ve come just because of me,” he provoked. Our eyes met and I wondered if his provocation was because things had always been like that between us, or if he was actually flirting with me. Of course he wasn’t flirting. That would never happen. I was probably delusional.

“I’ve come because of Astoria.”

He was quiet for a moment, and then he said, “You think no one here gives a damn, don’t you?”

It was a statement, not a real question. Even so, I decided to answer, “Not exactly. I know Astoria cares, and maybe another half a dozen. But I don’t think they called you here because they’re actually interested about your cause as noble as it is. Remember that these wizards and witches are anything but noble...”

“They didn’t exactly invite me here. Hermione’s been trying to make a speech here for a long time. They finally agreed with the condition that I gave the speech instead of her.”

“They didn’t let Granger in, did they?”

Harry’s green eyes darkened considerably. “They wouldn’t dare to do something like that. I was quite categorical about what I wanted, and I wanted her with me. But in the end she couldn’t come.”

As I thought about the episode, and how icy Harry’s voice must have sounded when dealing with that issue, I smiled. Of course that bunch of good for nothings wouldn’t have the courage to forbid Granger to soil their precious Club with her presence. She was, after all, one of Harry’s best friends. Whatever Harry wanted he had it. Not to mention that Granger really was a brilliant witch. Still, wasn’t it strange that the Club had let them in just now?

“Don’t you think it’s strange?” I asked, voicing my fears.

“What is?”

“Being invited here now. Why now?”

“Why not?” He shrugged. “I guess they’re finally getting into their thick heads that we cannot shut ourselves in our own tiny world and not expect things to affect us all. These boys and girls are just kids, but their doing a lot of damage because we’ve forgotten to look after them.” Harry’s voice was so bitter that it became clear he blamed himself for what was happening. I didn’t know why. After all, he couldn’t be responsible for everybody, let alone for what happened to the families of ex-Death Eaters. Nobody wanted them around. My own family suffered prejudice from our own kind.

“Don’t go thinking that they are nice, Potter,” I said.

“You can rest assure that I do not think that, Malfoy. But the fact is that we need all the help we can get. I didn’t come here to ask for money. I’ve come because I don’t want to see another Voldemort being created.”

At the mention of the Dark Lord’s name, I felt chills down my spine. Harry was probably one of the only people who could say his name aloud so calmly. I couldn’t even think about it without trembling.

“Don’t tell me you’re still afraid of Voldemort’s name, Malfoy,” Harry said, surprised.

“Of course not!” I lied, but unfortunately I wasn’t very convincing. He laughed and two cute dimples adorned his face. I felt like glomping him.

“I’m quite serious, Potter, you should be careful with Matilda.”

Harry stared at me intensely. I wondered if he had mastered Legilimency and was now trying it to penetrate my mind. If that was the case, I would try to keep him out even if it killed me. However, I didn’t feel any intrusion on his part. I bet he would like to try it, though.

“Do you know something I don’t?” he asked with false innocence.

“I don’t know what you know.”

He laughed humourlessly. “Don’t be a smartass, Malfoy. If you know something...”

“But I don’t. It’s just that...” I heard a noise coming from the outside and I stopped talking.

The idea of someone spying on us made me shiver. I stood up at once, ready to escape.

Harry also stood up and stopped me from leaving. “Malfoy...”

My heart thumped hard when I met his eyes. I shouldn’t be afraid of the past, but I was. I couldn’t hide the dread in my eyes for all that had happened and could happen again. I didn’t want Scorpius to have to go through what I had lived.

“Just be careful, Potter,” I said, and I left before I could make a fool of myself. Harry didn’t follow me, and I didn’t expect him to. With a sigh, I saw Astoria, and the moment she looked at me she knew it was time to go home. We didn’t apparate. I was too weak for that. Instead, we went by flu powder. When we arrived I went straight to my room. I wanted to hide from the world, as usual, like that was even possible.

I sat on my bed finding it difficult to believe that some time ago I had been so close to Harry. I had spoken to him. I had felt his male scent. I had seen him smile. I closed my eyes. I didn’t want to think of anything else anymore. I didn’t want to think of my obsession for Harry. I also didn’t want to think of what I had seen inside Matilda’s mind. I hoped it didn’t mean anything. Yet, while I was sleeping, I had horrible nightmares with Death Eaters coming back and murdering Harry. I had to do something. I had to make sure the Death Eaters were a thing of the past. But how? My father? I doubted he was going to tell me anything. Lucius had forbidden any unpleasant conversation about the past. I stood up all sweaty. I went to the window and looked outside where the moon reigned alone.

There was a place I could get information if I wanted to. I guess I’d pay a little visit to Knockturn Alley.


	4. Chapter 4

Knockturn Alley hadn’t changed that much. Perhaps their traders had become a little standoffish, but then again they had always been like that. Respected witches and wizards were almost never seen walking around Knockturn Alley, especially during the day. For at least 5 years after the war, the Alley had been patrolled by Aurors daily. Just the most stupid and unimportant Death Eaters had been caught hanging around, though.

A lot of time was spent discussing whether Knockturn Alley should be closed down forever. Some stores had been empty for fifteen years or more. Some still remained intact. Since certain magical items and products could only be found in Knockturn Alley, closing it down ceased to be an option. Unfortunately, the wizarding community needed a place such as this one. Needless to say that Harry was not happy with the Ministry’s decision, but there wasn’t anything he could do but keep an eye on it.

At the moment, the Alley was convenient. I didn’t want to be there, but I had to. I needed some information. The streets remained filthy. There was barely a soul in sight, and the few people who risked showing up were hooded and discreet. A horribly unattractive witch passed by me. Our eyes met for a second and I flinched. I hated to be here. When I was younger, I felt powerful walking through those dimly alleys with my father. Cursed artefacts had always fascinated me. I could spend hours in Borgin & Burkes exploring every evil item and dreaming of possessing a few. I had changed my mind after the war. I wouldn’t go as far as stating that I hated dark magic, but I wasn’t as interested in it as before.

How long had it been since I had entered Borgin & Burkes? The items on the dusty shelves didn’t look so creepy anymore, but I could bet they were just as dangerous. Almost all of them had the ‘do not touch’ sign. There was a jar full of human eyes on the counter. One of them blinked at me. On the walls I could see contorted masks that seemed to want to scare me away.

The old Burke was still alive, and he came from the backdoor when he heard someone entering the store, but he stopped when he saw me. He blanched, and I thought he would turn his back on me and run away. However, and surprisingly, he limped towards me, his shoulders down and one eye completely taken by cataract. I think his greed was stronger than his fear.

“I haven’t seen you in years. For I moment I thought you were your father. How can I help you?” he asked with his throaty voice.

I wondered how old he was. “I need information, and I’m willing to pay a good price for it.”

His only good eye sparkled with greediness. “I’ll be glad to help in any way I can.”

I took a small bag full of coins from my pocket and put it on the counter to cause an impact. His hands full of popped veins moved around restlessly. I think the old man hadn’t seen that much money in quite a while. I could understand why. Dark magic wasn’t so popular anymore.

“Matilda Junian. What’s she up to?” I asked.

Burke’s hands grabbed the bag before he opened his mouth. I pulled it back forcefully. My body reacted negatively to the whole place. I felt my stomach hurt. If I listened to my instincts, I would run as fast as I could and go back to the comfort of my house. I had to gather a lot of courage to stay and face the disgusting man in front of me.

“I need the information first, Burke,” I said coldly.

Burke stared at me with hatred. “I don’t know anything. Why do you ask?”

“I’ve heard she’s been hosting some strange meetings in her house,” I said, referring to what I’d seen in her mind. I hoped I was right. I hadn’t had a lot of time to go any further into the witch’s creepy head. She might have noticed something.

“Meetings? I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

I fiddle with the bag of money making the coins clink. Burke wetted his dry lips with his tongue. I recoiled.

“I suppose I do know something...” he started.

“I’ll be very generous.”

“I’m surprised you don’t know anything, Mr. Malfoy. I thought you were part of the group.”

“Which group?”

“The Almighty Group. They get together once a week in the basement of the Wizarding Club.”

“To do what?”

“I have no idea. That’s all I know.” He put out his hands to get the bag.

“You didn’t give me anything, Burke,” I reminded him coolly. “I need more.”

He snorted. “And what do I know nowadays? Nothing! I have Aurors coming here once a month! I’ve lost a lot of clients because of them! And you, why don’t you ask your own kind about what’s been going on? Your father must know more than I do!”

I sincerely hoped that my father wasn’t involved in anything illegal. Not again. Hadn’t he learned his lesson? My mother certainly had. But then again, my mother had always been more sensible than Lucius.

“Who’s part of the group?” I asked.

More grumbling and swearing. “Dolohov, Carrow, Avery, Rowle... The usual lot.”

I felt chills down my spine. The old Death Eaters couldn’t obviously get together. They were all dead or in Azkaban. Burke wasn’t talking about the old bunch, but the next generation. Sons and grandsons of ex-Death Eaters. Were they the gang of wizard orphans Harry wanted to help so much? Was Harry in the Club because he knew something was not right in there? I felt so stupid. Harry knew, of course. He didn’t do anything without a purpose. I bet he followed me and pretended to help me to see if I’d say something. Harry Potter was a bastard. He was always a step ahead.

“Why are they gathering? Is the Death Gang a part of it?”

Burke’s eyes squinted. I could only guess at what he was thinking. I thought about using Legilimency against him but it was too risky. I was weak, and Burke wasn’t an air-head like Matilda. He had suffered that kind of magic before. I bet he could defend himself against it.

“I’m clean, Mr. Malfoy. I don’t meddle with these kinds of things anymore.”

“What things, Burke?” I insisted.

“Things that are none of my business. That’s all I’m saying. If you need anything else, I’m at your service. But I don’t deal with that kind of thing anymore, if you know what I mean.”

I clenched my fists. I had never been as good as my father to obtain information from other people. Lucius was a natural at it. He always knew what buttons to press and how much to pay. I, however, didn’t have his wicked talents.

“Just one more thing, Burke, and then this bag will double.”

My father would have killed me if it were here.

“They are connected with the Death Gang, running the show behind the curtains. Are you satisfied now?” he answered much to his dislike.

I didn’t know whether he was telling the truth or just wanted to get rid of me faster. In any case, I gave him the bags with the money. His crumpled hands closed tightly around them, as if he were expecting me to change my mind. My father used to do that. I didn’t. I let him keep the money. I offered him more in case he could tell me something else. Burke seemed tempted, and I wondered if I’d receive news from him soon. I left the store feeling rather disappointed. What a great fool I was. In my fantasies I found out some wicked plan being orchestrated against the wizarding world and Harry Potter thanking me profusely for helping him dismantle the new rising evil. I even thought that maybe he would make me his friend this time around.

My mouth contorted in a bitter smile. I was indeed pretty arrogant if I still thought that I was better than the great Harry Potter.

I felt exhausted, so I leaned against a wall for a moment. What happened next was completely unexpected. A boy came running out of nowhere and grabbed my robe. He looked about five years old. He was very small, with chestnut hair and big green eyes. His face was shaped like a heart, and he was all dirty. My disgust was as strong as my fatherly instinct. His dirty little hands made me nauseated, but his green eyes stopped me from getting away. His eyes looked so much like Harry’s...

Another child appeared, but it was a teenager this time. He was probably fourteen. He was almost as tall as I and had brown eyes and bleached hair. When he saw the boy attached to the hem of my robe he seemed relieved. His relief didn’t last long. Another figure appeared behind him, wand ready to strike. I instantly pulled my wand out, and before the hooded person could hit the teenager with what I knew was the beginning of Cruciatus, I hit him hard on the chest with a Stunning spell. The older boy looked at me both with gratitude and distrust. The little one grabbed my silky robe harder and hid his face behind me.

Another hooded person appeared throwing curses at us. My heart beat faster. A part of me wanted to panic, but the other part told me to hold on. I defended myself the best I could, mainly because even though the older boy had a wand, he didn’t seem to know what to do with it. Another wizard came and shouted something to the man attacking me.

“Stop! That’s Malfoy!” said a familiar voice. Even hidden in the shadows, I recognized the big broad-shouldered man as Gregory Goyle. I hadn’t seen in such a long time.

My mind got filled with past memories of Hogwarts. The other man lowered his wand. It was strange to see Goyle giving another person orders and being promptly obeyed. I was the one who used to do that.

“Malfoy, I apologise for the sudden attack,” said Goyle. “It’s just that we need those boys.”

“For what?” I dared ask.

The man next to Goyle laughed. “Like you have the right to ask, you bloody traitor!’ said the man.

I didn’t know who he was. His face wasn’t familiar.

“Leave it, Travers. We just want the boys, Malfoy,’ Goyle insisted. He had his wand on his hand and he was ready to use it. We weren’t friends anymore. Actually, we had never really been friends.

Goyle and Crabbe had been my thugs in Hogwarts and nothing more. Crabbe had let the Dark Lord’s power go to his head and he ended up dying. Goyle had been a little less idiotic. After the war, our parents had lost touch. Goyle’s father was sent to Azkaban while my father managed to get away with it, as usual. That was one of the reasons we were called traitors. The other one was because we had failed in pretty much every mission the Dark Lord had assigned us with. The fact that I saved Goyle didn’t seem to matter. Or perhaps it did. Perhaps that was why he hadn’t hexed me yet.

The teenager’s eyes were gleaming with anger. He was trapped, but he kept his head up. I almost laughed. That attitude was so Harry Potter’s.

“What’s going on here, Goyle?” I asked using the same drawling voice that had made me famous in the past, and that had commanded Goyle to do my whims. For a moment I actually had him there.

Travers, who I knew now to be an ex-Death Eater, pointed his wand at me and said energetically, “You’d better stay out of this, Malfoy! We don’t want you and your filthy family in our group!”

“Come on, Draco,” said Goyle a little less aggressive. I noticed, however, that he gripped his wand harder. “We just want the boys. They belong to us.”

“I belong to no one!” exclaimed the teenager, pointing his wand at Travers. He tried to hit Travers, but he was a beginner and all he managed to do was make a big hole on the wall in front of us.

The noise was so loud I was suprised nobody appeared. I thought the Aurors’ Squad patrolled the Alley. I didn’t have time to make any more conjectures. I didn’t have time to wait for the arrival of the good guys. Maybe, if I were smart, I would just deliver them the boys and go straight home. Unfortunately, I was done with that kind of bad boy life for good. Before an Unforgivable curse could hit us, I quickly pulled the other boy to my side and as I held him and his brother I ran. As soon as I saw myself in an area free from anti-apparation spells I disapparated to the Manor with both clutched to me. I did my best not to waver and kill us all in the process. The last thing I noticed was Goyle and Travers swearing out loud and the little one hanging on to me for his dear life.


	5. Chapter 5

I was definitely going insane. As soon as I arrived at the Manor, all my bravery seemed to vanish. I just held myself together because there was somebody holding me who was a lot more scared than I.

“Where are we? What is this place?” asked the blond teenager with widened eyes, probably because of the size of the Manor.

The Malfoy Manor was a sight to behold. With at least eighty rooms, those who didn’t know it well would get lost pretty easily once inside. Some peacocks were walking around in the huge trimmed lawn. The little boy beside me relaxed a little when he saw them, looking rather interested at this new scenario. My dogs came running toward us and I had to shout a command so that they would behave. 

“Honey?” Astoria appeared on the front door and looked at me in awe. 

I couldn’t even begin to imagine what was going through her head, but at this point all I wanted was the comfort of my living room and a strong cup of tea, preferably with my pills. I needed my pills urgently. I walked with some difficult toward the porch where Astoria was looking at me as if petrified by a spell. Her eyes grew wide as she saw the little boy attached to me. I guess her motherly instincts kicked in, because she came to us immediately and knelt down next to him, taking him gently away from me and leading him inside. 

“Hey, hey! Where does she think she’s going with my brother?” the other boy shouted, and he ran toward my wife as if to strike her.

It was easy to stop him with a flick of my wand, and I have to say that it was rather fun. The teenager glared at me.

“She is my wife. What’s your name, brat?” I asked. 

He held up his chin. 

“My name’s Alfred. And I’m not a brat! I’m fifteen!”

He was older than I expected.

“And your brother?”

“Why do you want to know?” he asked defensively. 

I smiled humourlessly. 

“Maybe because I was crazy enough to bring you both here, to my house, I think I have a right to know your names, don’t I?”

He grunted.

“His name’s Angel. And could you please release me?”

I walked to where he was. He continued to look at me murderously. He was a brave kid for a brat.

“I’ll think about it, Fred.”

“I hate people calling me Fred!”

“Whatever, Fred. You’re in my territory. I’ll call you whatever I feel like it.”

The kid grumbled louder. He was really fun to tease. His short temper reminded me of Harry. I wondered if that was the reason I’d brought them home with me. The little one had Harry’s eyes, and the old one was short-fused and had that unbearable fearlessness of somebody who wasn’t afraid of anything. They were both so much like Harry.  
I was really losing my mind. Maybe I should schedule an appointment in St Mungus. Astoria might suggest that for sure. Her husband was becoming a loony. 

Looking on the bright side, at least I hadn’t kidnapped Harry’s children. 

“So this is your house?” the annoying voice interrupted my thoughts. “Are you rich?”

I smirked. “Isn’t it obvious?”

He made a face.

“Why don’t you take me off the spell and let me run away with my brother?”

“Why don’t you act nicely and thank me for saving your life first?” I refuted.

“I’d have escaped if you hadn’t been in my way!”

“Of course you’d have. You had Death Eaters chasing after you, and all you had to protect you and your baby brother was a wand that seemed to be doing more harm than good... Indeed, your chances were really good,” I said sarcastically.

I finally let him off the spell and walked to the Hall. The brat walked behind me asking millions of things at once and ordering me to bring him his brother.

When I entered the main living room, I poured myself some whiskey. It was never a good idea to drink with the kind of meds I was taking, but what the hell. I needed something strong. I offered a glass to Alfred, who, in a daring move, took it from me and drank it in on gulp. It was funny to watch him roll his eyes and pass out on the couch. The boy had probably never drunk alcohol in his life. I enjoyed the silence, broken only by Astoria’s light steps.

“Draco, you know you shouldn’t drink,” she scolded softly. Only Astoria had the power to be forgiving even when she was angry.

I wished so much I could love her the way she deserved to be loved.

“It was just one glass. Where’s the other kid?”

She looked at Alfred and frowned as she heard him snore. However, she didn’t ask any questions.

“This is Alfred,” I explained with a smile. “And the shorter one is Angel. They are brothers.”

“What happened? You look awful!” She came to my side and put her hands on my forehead. “You have a fever, Draco. I think you should have a bath and then go to bed. I’ll take care of the rest.”

She was phenomenal. The world was falling apart and all she could think about was my health. 

“You don’t even know what’s going on,” I reminded her.

“Well, you must’ve had your reasons.”

I sighed loudly.

“They were attacked by Death Eaters.”

Her rosy doll face blanched. I knew Astoria had hated the war as much as any normal wizard and witch had. Her father had resisted the temptation of being the Dark Lord’s minion, but he’d paid a huge price for his cheekiness. His first-born son had been killed as punishment. 

“Death Eaters?” she asked in a low voice. “I thought they didn’t exist anymore...”

“So did I. Well, but they might not be called Death Eaters anymore. I guess now they have rebranded it and call themselves ‘The Almighty’.”

“But why? What is it that they want?”

“I haven’t got the faintest idea. Perhaps Alfred might know something.”

“Is that why you brought them here?”

“No.” I sat on the armchair as if afraid that my body wouldn’t take its weight any longer. “I didn’t mean to. It just happened. I couldn’t leave them there. I don’t know what Goyle and the others are planning, but I don’t like the idea that they don’t mind attacking children as they see fit.”

Astoria nodded as if my bizarre actions didn’t surprise her in the least. 

“How’s Angel?” I asked.

She finally smiled a little less anxiously. 

“He’s taking a shower. He was so dirty, Draco! I fear to think of what these boys must have gone through till now...” she shivered. “He’s so cute. But he’s frightened, and I should go to where he is. I left him with Lara.”

I watched her go without saying anything. I called Joah, another one of our house-elves, and I asked him to take care of Alfred. The boy also needed a shower and probably food and plenty of rest. He was rather thin for someone his age. I was sure he was one of the children that would fit Harry’s charity programs perfectly. 

And speaking of the devil... A part of me wanted to get in touch with him and tell him everything that had happened. Another part was too scared. I had no idea of what was going on in the wizarding world and I didn’t like it. 

Another reason not to call Harry was that I had never been a perfect citizen. Although I behaved myself, I had committed some small offences over the years. It wasn’t anything serious, really, but the Ministry never let anything go by. Like when I unsuccessfully tried to import a dragon’s cub from Romania for Scorpius’ sixth birthday party. 

Getting in touch with the Ministry, then, was out of the question. I needed to speak with my father. But before I did, I needed some rest. I went to my room and entered the bathroom and I was not surprised when I looked at myself in the mirror. I looked like the living-dead. I was pale, but sort of feverish at the same time and had deep shadows under my eyes. I felt so much older than I was.

The tepid water ran over my body and relaxed my sore muscles. I was certain I’d fall asleep immediately once I settled my head on the pillow. I wasn’t wrong. I woke up with Astoria shaking me delicately. Her beautiful face looked worried. 

“What’s wrong?” I asked, opening my eyes slowly.

“Harry Potter is here.”

“What?”

I stood up at once.

“Harry Potter is here, in our living room. He wants to speak with you.”

It was impossible to control the hasty beating of my heart. I didn’t want to see Harry, but at the same time I did. If he was there than it couldn’t be a good thing. I bet it had everything to do with the turn of events in Knockturn Alley. Somehow he had gotten word of it. Then again, Harry always knew everything that happened in the wizarding world. There were no exceptions. I still remembered how he knew exactly where to intercept my dragon’s cub and how amused he had been at my audacity. 

He wouldn’t be on my side, I was sure of it. I should be the main suspect in whatever it was that he was investigating. But before my mind could give wings to my fruitful imagination, I decided to go upstairs and face him.

I really preferred the comfort of my chamber, where I knew I would be perfectly safe. I could already feel the familiar dizziness overtake me, and my stomach churned as I got dressed. I also began to sweat. These were typical symptoms of a person who suffered from panic attacks. 

I slowly descended to where Harry was, as if that would somehow relieve me from my suffering. I walked through a long corridor on my right and went to the main living room. As I opened the door, I saw Harry standing against the fireplace. He was alone. His emerald green-eyes turned to me right away. My body turned to jelly. My sickness got worse. The problem now wasn’t just because I was panicking, but also because Harry was right there. 

“Potter,” I said with a drawling voice. I tried to pretend I was bored. 

“Malfoy,” he said in the same tone, an eyebrow raised. “You look worse than when we saw each other in the Snobs Wizarding Club in London.”

“Aren’t you a gentleman?” I said with a smirk. “How can I help you? It’s a little late for social visits.”

“Well, this isn’t one, so I guess I didn’t break any rules of good manners, eh?” his smiled was as cynical as mine. “I think you know why I’m here.”

“Can you be more specific?”

He laughed.

“Should I worry about that affirmation?”

I frowned.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“Well, if I have to be more specific, it means you’ve been living it up, huh?”

Oh, yes. My life was fucking superb. I spent most of my days at home reading, trying to eat something and walking around my property with my dogs. Scorpius was certainly missed.

“I’ve been living on the right side of the law, Potter,” I stated.

“I believe you. Your last five years have been rather secluded.”

I felt my whole body stiff. So he knew about everything. I wondered if he knew I was seeing a psychiatrist. It was possible. Nothing escaped Harry Potter’s tiger-eyes. However, I seriously doubted that he knew what I felt for him. At least this aspect of my life was perfectly safe.

“I still remember quite fondly of that dragon cub you tried to bring from Romania,” he pointed out.

I sneered.

“It’s water under the bridge, Potter. If I remember correctly, I paid a small fortune in fines for that particular episode.”

“If you look on the bright side, you weren’t arrested as you should’ve been.”

He was right. If I had been arrested, I wouldn’t have survived a day in Azkaban. He knew that. My lawyers had managed a fair agreement with the Ministry of Justice Department to make sure I was kept out of prison.

“Why don’t you get to the point, Potter? Why are you here?”

I was exhausted. I sat on the nearest armchair to try to hide my discomfort. If he noticed anything, he didn’t say.

“There was a ruckus in Knockturn Alley at approximately 03h40min in the afternoon.”

If he was expecting me to say something, he got disappointed.

Harry put his hands in his pockets. Unfortunately, he was wearing his typical Auror uniform – a horrible but intimidating black robe with the symbol of an eagle on the chest. I never thought I would hear myself saying this, but I preferred him wearing muggle clothes. They made him look much more attractive. 

His hair remained messy and very, very dark. He ran his fingers through them. I had to bite my lips to avoid a moan of desire.

His green eyes sparkled as he met mine. Did he notice my unhealthy desire for him? I shivered.

“Are you cold?” he asked.

Harry didn’t let anything slide. How annoying!

“A little,” I answered.

“Do you want me to heat up the fireplace?” he offered.

I looked at him as if I was seeing a three-headed dog in front of me.

“Okay, so I’m the one sick and you’re the one who goes crazy?” 

A sexy smile adorned his lips. It was all it took to make my heart beat madly again. I felt like I was falling off a cliff.

“I’m just trying to be nice. Are you really sick? What’s wrong with you?” 

“What does it matter to you? It’s none of your business anyway,” I answered coldly. 

A part of me, though, was delighted for catching a glimpse of genuine worry in Harry’s eyes. 

He sighed.

“Alright, no more chit-chat then,” he said tiredly.

He came a little closer. I held my breath. 

“Knockturn Alley, Malfoy. What happened?”

“How should I know?” I asked nonchalantly. 

“Well, you should. You were there after all. An eye-witness saw you shoot spells around more than once. One of them hit somebody. But no one knows who the others were.”  
“Oh, so I’m the escape goat,” I sneered. “I wonder why...”

“Perhaps it’s because the Malfoy genes are unique.”

“You mean, we’re all tall, blond and incredibly handsome?”

“I’m not sure about the ‘handsome’ part.”

“Ah, but what an interesting choice of words, Potter. So you are torn between finding me devilishly handsome or just plain sexy,” I provoked him not knowing where I’d gotten the nerve to do it.

Harry almost smiled, or at least that was the impression I had. He closed the distance between us and sat next to me. I had to fight hard to remain indifferent.

“Come on, Malfoy. If you don’t tell me what happened, I’ll have to summon you to testify at the Ministry, where you’ll be questioned not only by me but by several Aurors who don’t like you. It won’t be very pleasant, I’m sure you realise that.”

I shuddered at the mere thought of being questioned by Aurors again. 

“Did they find a body in Knockturn Alley?” 

“Are you telling me you killed someone?” he frowned, and his body went stiff.

“No, Potter! I’m just asking if they found someone unconscious.”

“There was nobody there when we arrived, just a big hole on the wall of an empty store, and some damage here and there. You were there, weren’t you?”

“Shouldn’t you be asking me first where I was at 3h40?”

“I’m losing my patience, Malfoy,” he gently warned me. I could see the fierceness in his eyes, though.

I leaned against the armchair and closed my eyes. What good would it be to hide the truth from him? Perhaps if I shared a little of what I knew with Harry, somehow we would be closer. Or maybe I should just cast the killing curse upon myself and end with my sorry excuse of a life once and for all. 

“I was in Knockturn Alley,” I confessed.

I began to tell him my story. I told him about how I suspected Matilda Junian was up to something, and how I had gone to the Alley to gather some information about it. Then I narrated my fight with Goyle and the other two. Harry listened to everything without saying a word, aware of every detail in my tale.

“I’m stunned,” he said after a while. “It’s amazing that you did all this for a greater good.”

I grimaced. 

“I didn’t expect you to turn against your old mates, Malfoy, let alone protect two innocent children against them.”

“Hey, Potter!” I interrupted him before he let me even more irritated. “Please, don’t forget that you’re in my house! I demand some respect! And just so you know, they are not my friends.”

“Do I have to remind you about your past, Malfoy? Or of what my friends and I suffered here in this house?” his tone of voice was grave. 

Alright, he had a point. I was Draco Malfoy, ex-Death-Eater, son of one as well, and my only concern had been to cover my own arse. But that was in the past. So many years had gone by since I’d made all the wrong choices... Didn’t he notice that this room was different from the other one? I’d closed down the former main living room of the Manor forever. So many people had been tortured and killed in there that I couldn’t stand getting near it. Harry didn’t seem to realise that.

“People change,” I declared.

“They don’t change that much.”

“It was so long ago, Potter! I’ve learned my lesson well!” I said with an anger I didn’t know I still possessed. 

He shrugged. He didn’t believe in me. Screw him then! I should have kept everything to myself and refused to see him. Then in the morning the boys would have left and there would be nothing to connect me to Knockturn Alley.

But I was a masochist and I wanted Harry near me, even if it was in such a sordid way.

“So that’s really all you know?” he asked after a minute of silence.

“Yes. You can give me the Truth serum if you want to,” I teased. 

“Don’t try me.”

We stared at each other for a while, and I felt this amazing energy flow between us. There was fire in the green eyes, but I didn’t dare to hope. The attraction wasn’t mutual and never would be. Why couldn’t I just get over it? I was the first to look away. 

“You don’t seem to be in any condition to take a potion as strong as the Truth Serum anyway,” he pointed out.

Merlin, was my appearance that bad?

“I must speak with the boys,” Harry said without taking my unpleasantness into consideration. “They’ll be taken to our Institution. They’ll fine there. Could you call them, please?”  
“Potter, it’s late. They’re sleeping. And far from contradicting you, but do you really think they’ll be safer in the Institution?”

He looked at me as if I was an infant who didn’t know the ways of the world. I got royally pissed.

“They’ll be safer there than here. Your friends...”

“They’re not my friends!”

“Whatever. They’ll come here. You know that. I’m surprised they haven’t come yet.”

“Nobody would ever believe that I’d bring them to my house, would they? Not Draco Malfoy, the coward,” I despised myself for my own bitter words. Unfortunately, they were true. “Besides, the Manor is very well-protected against unpleasant visitors.”

And by unpleasant visitors I meant ex-Death Eaters who would like to see my family annihilated from the face of the earth.

“Maybe you’re right.” Once more his eyes pierced through me and I felt like I was floating somewhere else, somewhere livelier and happier. 

His stare made me restless. 

“Are you trying Legilimency against me, Potter?” I asked suspiciously. 

He laughed.

“I wouldn’t dream of doing something like that, Malfoy.”

“Snape used to say you weren’t really good at it,” I said.

A shadow overcame Harry’s face for a moment, and then it was gone.

“Well, at the time he was right,” he said to my utter surprise.

There was a period of uncomfortable silence. Why had I brought Snape up?

“He believed in you, Potter,” I said quietly. I wasn’t sure Harry had heard it.

What he said next made it clear that he had.

“I know, Malfoy. It’s not a coincidence that my son’s name is Albus Severus.” 

“Oh, right. But really, Potter, poor kid. That’s a horrible name.”

He grimaced. “No more than Scorpius Hyperion.” 

I didn’t have time to retort. He stood up suddenly and went to stand in a corner of the room. I raised a brow, wondering if he had seen something there or if he simply wanted more space between us. 

What I hadn’t noticed before was that his mobile phone had been vibrating in his pocket, which was why he had needed more privacy. He spoke quietly and tenderly, and I could imagine who it was on the other side of the line. I closed my eyes once again. Why did I have to put up with that?

“Malfoy, here’s the deal,” he said when he hung up the phone. “The boys can stay here until tomorrow. After that they’ll be leaving with me. In the meantime, two of my men will stay here to protect them.”

“That’s not necessary.” 

Needless to say that the idea of having Aurors in my house didn’t make me happy. The Manor had served as the Dark Lord’s headquarters during the war, and afterwards it had been swerved by angry Aurors confiscating everything we had. Of course I didn’t want them back in my house. 

“Of course it is. Besides, I don’t see how you can stop me.”

“It’s my house!”

“And the boys are my witnesses. I can’t risk their lives.”

But he could risk mine? I was a witness, too. I thought about complaining, but it wouldn’t do me any good. Eventually, I ended up agreeing. I knew it was useless to be opposed to the idea of Aurors hanging around the Manor. Whether I liked it or not, they would stay because the almighty Harry Potter had said so.

Harry turned his back on me and went to the door. I stood up, and even feeling nauseated and dizzy I kept myself upright. 

“Potter, aren’t you going to tell me what’s going on?”

“I don’t see a reason why I should.”

I wanted to go for his neck.

“Don’t you think I deserve to know? I saved those kids’ lives! I went to Knockturn Alley to obtain information for you!” I let on.

I paled instantly. Why did I say that? What was he going to think of me now? I didn’t have the courage to look in his eyes. I was afraid of what I was going to see in them. He was saying something, but I was so disturbed that I didn’t hear a word of it. I thought I would pass out. Something was compressing my chest, making me out of breath. 

“... So we can finish our conversation tomorrow,” he ended.

And then he was gone. I stood still for a long time, and that was how Astoria found me minutes later. She tried to make me talk, but I had no strength left. I just went back to my room, locked the door and fastened the curtains. Then, in the dark, I cried.


	6. Chapter 6

The morning was cold and grey. Unfortunately, the cloudy sky and the freezing wind stopped me from having breakfast in the solarium as I usually did. Instead, I preferred to remain inside where it was warm but as sombre as my mood. I wasn’t hungry, but breakfast was a necessary ritual. Besides, I needed to eat something. I knew that if I didn’t I’d only feel worse later on.

Astoria showed up with little Angel by her side while I was having a cup of tea with milk. He was now properly dressed up in Scorpius’ old clothes. He really was a remarkably beautiful boy. His tiny mouth and nose were perfect. The once dirty brown hair was now silky and shiny. His green eyes sparkled with joy. Astoria made him sit on a chair that was proper for someone his size. 

Angel opened his eyes wide as he looked at the table. I smiled sadly. Living on the streets, I guess scrambled eggs, fresh scones, cakes, muffins, juice and fruit were something completely new to him. I felt something squeeze my heart, and Harry’s struggle to help those poor kids finally made sense to me, which only made me feel worse. 

I had never paid much attention to the Albus Dumbledore Foundation for Needy Children. I told myself it was because I didn’t want to be near Harry in any way. But the fact was that I had stayed away for my own selfish reasons. 

As I looked at Angel and the way he kept shoving food down his throat as if expecting everything to vanish from his sight at any moment, I felt the worst man alive.

I used to think my character had improved after the war, but had it really? How did I expect Harry to notice me if I was still the same?

My eyes were drawn to the moody teenager that arrived with one of the house-elves fretting behind him. I wasn’t sure whether I should laugh or frown. He certainly looked more presentable that morning. He sat next to his brother as soon as he saw him, and stared at me and Astoria with distrust. Astoria smiled at him sweetly. 

“Please, make yourself at home. I’ll ask Swan to bring you a cup of tea,” said Astoria with her melodic voice. “Or perhaps you’d prefer something else.”

“I don’t want anything,” he replied rudely.

I grimaced.

“Don’t be impolite,” I scolded. “I bet you haven’t had a decent meal in ages. Just eat whatever you like.”

Angel glanced at his brother expectantly. I’m still not sure whether Alfred began to eat to let his brother more at ease, or if it was because his stomach began to rumble. All I know is that the boy finally stopped complaining and started eating just as eagerly as Angel. He even answered to some of Astoria’s questions without being aggressive. He, like his brother next to him, was starving. I almost envied them. How long have I actually eaten anything and felt any pleasure in doing so?

When they were finished, the house-elves came to clean up the table. I took them to another room at the back of the Manor, which was brighter and larger. It was a place where Scorpius used to play around a lot when he was at home. Some of his toys were still scattered about. 

Angel got very interested in two plastic wands that were on top of the coffee table. I let Astoria take him by the hand and give him permission to touch them. Alfred was right beside me, watching everything as if waiting for the perfect moment to escape. Poor kid.

I saw somebody moving outside. A man in a black robe waved at me just to spite me. It was one of the Aurors Harry had left at the Manor the previous night. I swallowed my irritation. 

“Alfred, we need to talk,” I said to the boy next to me, who jumped skittishly as he heard me. He had been staring at the Auror. 

“I don’t think I have anything to say,” he said defiantly. 

The boy certainly had a temper. I expected him to behave like that, so I told him to sit next to me on the loveseat while Astoria, always so aware of my intentions, took Angel to a place where there was a trunk with many of Scorpius’ old toys so she could give us some privacy. 

“I think you’ve got a lot to say. Why were you being chased?” I insisted. 

Alfred grunted. He began to pace nervously with his arms crossed. I knew he was wondering whether he could trust me with his secrets.

“How long have you been living on the streets?” I asked more gently.

He stopped and stared at me.

“I don’t know, for quite some time now... Not that I care or anything. But I worry about Angel.” He looked at his brother with tenderness in his eyes, but also apprehension. 

“Who are your parents?” I was trying not to sound like an inquisitor, but I guess I just wasn’t cut out for it.

“It’s none of your business!”

The same Auror of before, a tall and strong man, tapped the glass door and asked me to open it. Harry was standing next to him. It took me a while to put myself together as I had not noticed Harry’s presence at all. After taking a deep breath, I walked towards them and slid the door open. Harry walked in and so did the other Auror. I hated having Aurors in the sanctity of my home. Death Eaters and Aurors only brought me bad memories. 

Harry scanned the room briefly. Astoria was still playing with Angel a few feet away. Our eyes met momentarily. I tried to show her I was alright. 

Alfred, on the other hand, looked ready to run away. He would have probably tried to apparate away from here had he known how to do it. Harry noticed the tension in him and gave him a friendly smile. It was an open smile, the sort of smile you’d get from a caring father. I guess Harry’s attitude seemed to convince Alfred that standing in front of him was an ally and not an enemy because the boy relaxed a little bit.

“I need to speak with you,” said Harry looking straight into Alfred’s eyes. “Your name’s Alfred, right?”

Alfred didn’t say or do anything. He just kept quiet. 

“And that’s Angel,” Harry continued, pointing at the smaller boy, who now looked at us curiously. 

“Is there a place we can talk in private?” Harry’s question was addressed to me.

I nodded.

“This way.”

I took them to a smaller – though not less comfortable – room. Everybody stood still instead of sitting down. It was as if we were all expecting the other to flee or do something unexpected at any moment. 

“Could you give us some privacy, Malfoy?” 

His words cut me like a knife. I remained as impassive as I could. If Astoria could see me now, I guess she would be proud. 

“I’m sorry, Potter, but this is my house and the boy is my guest. Since I’m the adult responsible for his well-being right now, I’d rather stay.”

The Auror, whose name I didn’t know, got his wand and seemed about to threaten me with it. Harry stopped him. 

“It’s alright, Louis,” he said to the man, and then to me, “If the problem is having someone to be responsible for him, I can ask for one of the tutors of our Institution to come here.”

“I think I have the right to know what’s going on, Potter. After all, I was the one who saved them,” I challenged him. It was quite a step for a coward like me. On second thought, where Harry Potter was concerned, I always felt my blood boil, and I could never refrain myself from standing up to him. 

Harry seemed to know what was going through my head because he smiled to himself briefly. It was quite a sexy smile. 

“Hey, you’re forgetting something!” Alfred exclaimed. “I don’t want to talk to anybody! All I want is to get away from everything!”

“Okay,” said Harry softly as he turned to look at Alfred. “If you tell me where I can find your parents, then I’ll let you go. But if there isn’t anyone to take care of you, then I’ll have to take you with me to the Institution.”

“You mean the orphans’ prison?” Alfred said with contempt. 

Harry raised a brow.

“The Institution is far from being a prison. It’s a very good place for children like you.”

“Children like me? And what do you know about me exactly?” 

“That’s what I’m trying to find out. Why don’t you tell me what happened yesterday in Knockturn Alley? Who were you running away from and why? And before you deny everything, think about your brother in the other room. I wouldn’t like to have to question him, but I’ll do it if I have to.”

“I forbid you to do anything against my brother!” the boy shouted. I had to admit, he was quite a brave kid.

“It’s good to know you care so much for him, Alfred,” said Harry kindly. “We won’t hurt him or you for that matter. I just need to know what happened. Was Malfoy involved in any way? You don’t have to be afraid to tell me the truth. I’m here to protect you from anyone and anything.”

I frowned. I was truly offended. Couldn’t he tell how much I was exposing myself to my old enemies just by having the boys in my house, and with Aurors everywhere? The Death Eaters, or the Almighty, or whatever their name was, were probably keeping an eye on me now. I was in danger. But of course Harry Potter didn’t care. 

“I’m risking my neck for them, Potter,” I couldn’t hold my tongue.

The Auror named Louis sneered. Harry looked at me, but before he could say anything, he was cut off by Alfred’s loud voice, “I didn’t ask for anyone’s help!”

“No, you would’ve been fine without me, wouldn’t you?” I pointed out with a smirk.

“Alfred, we just want to help you,” said Harry with the same tranquil voice that was getting on my nerves. 

“Just because you’re Harry Potter, it doesn’t mean I trust you! We’re in this situation because of you! It’s all your fault! It’s your fault my father’s gone! It’s your fault my mother...”

Alfred stopped talking. He was trembling all over, and he had tears in his eyes. Even so, he was strong enough not to shed them. I pitied him, but more incredibly than that was the wave of fatherly affection that came over me. I wanted to protect him. Harry seemed to be feeling the same way, but for him the feeling wasn’t as alien as it was for a person like me. 

I also noticed how hurt Harry looked by Alfred’s affirmation, which distracted me from my own pain. Harry felt guilty. When we talked in Matilda’s house, he looked sincerely shaken by the increase of wizards who were living on the streets. Kids who were related to ex-Death Eaters. Kids just like Alfred and Angel. I was shocked to realise that Harry blamed himself. 

“I guess you’re right,” Harry finally said sadly. 

Alfred and I were thunderstruck. 

“I’m not proud of a lot of things...” Harry continued. “I wasn’t paying attention when I should have... What happened with your parents?”

“My dad... I don’t know,” Alfred finally said. I guess Harry’s sudden frailty got to him as much as it got to me. “He just disappeared. And my mum... She... She killed herself when I was eleven. You know how it is. The same old sad story. She didn’t have enough money to send me to school, and she didn’t want to accept anyone’s charity.”

The room looked as if it had suddenly been invaded by Dementors. 

“What have you done since then?” asked Harry. His eyes looked so sad. 

“What I had to! Angel was only two! It’s been difficult, but we’ve managed. We found others like us!”

“The Death Gang,” said Louis.

“Yes, and they’re nice! They let us stay with them. They took care of us! They’re just like me. Nobody cares about us, so why should we care about the rest of the world?”  
“Oh, yes, Matthew MacNair is a charming young man. I know he looks after you.”

Matthew MacNair? I didn’t remember him. I did remember Walden MacNair very well however. He was still locked up in Azkaban not only for being a Death Eater but also for killing Broderick Bode. 

“Do you know Matthew?” Alfred asked as if that was impossible.

“I know him very well,” Harry stated.

“Who is he?” I asked. 

“Their leader. He’s 24 years-old and is Walden Macnair’s grandson,” Harry answered. “When his grandfather was arrested, his family fell apart. His grandmother ran away to Romania where she had relatives, taking only her younger daughter with her. The eldest son was recruited by Voldemort but he failed and was killed because of it. Matthew’s mother...”

“...killed herself,” Alfred completed for him.

“Yes.” Harry sighed heavily. He was obviously upset. “You really don’t know anything about it, Malfoy?” 

I shook my head. After the war I’d been too busy with my own wounds to care about everyone else’s. I had hated every minute of my life as a Death Eater. I sometimes felt like ripping my arm out every time I saw the dark mark on my wrist. It had never vanished completely after the Dark Lord died. It was now faded, but still there. 

Louis whispered something in Harry’s ear. I clutched my fists at his audacity. I could see in his eyes that he didn’t trust me nor did he like my presence in the room.

“Maybe I don’t know what you’ve been going through, Alfred, but I’m also an orphan,” Harry said looking at Alfred. “I never met my parents. I know how you feel.”

“You have no idea.”

“That’s not true. But I understand if you don’t want to believe me. You know, however, that Matthew and the others are wrong. The muggles are not to blame for your current situation. They don’t deserve to be punished for something they don’t even know about.”

“Then who deserves to be punished? You?”

Harry stared at him sadly. Louis seemed about to strangle the boy. 

“Maybe. I’m just trying to help. I’ve already waved the white flag. I’m in touch with Matthew. He seems ready to cooperate with us.”

“I don’t believe it.”

“If you come with me to the Institution, I can explain things to you better. You can talk to Matthew too.”

Alfred shook his head.

“I won’t fall for that! Matthew wouldn’t trust you! You’re our enemy!”

“I’m not, and Matthew knows that. You know it too, Alfred. After all, you were chased by the same monsters that created the Death Gang – The Almighty. You know very well that Matthew is just a pawn in the hands of ill-intentioned witches and wizards. It’s because of this that you’re running away with your brother, isn’t it?”

“You don’t know anything.” Alfred seemed extremely disturbed now.

“I know that some of the boys don’t want to be pawns. And they don’t want to hurt anybody. A muggle boy died, did you know that?”

I was taken aback, and so was Alfred. I hadn’t read anything in the papers. I wondered if the Ministry was once again trying to hide the truth from us. That was a really bad sign.

“I...” Alfred stuttered. 

“Were you there when it happened?” Harry asked with so much tactfulness that even I would have confessed my worst crimes if he had asked me.

“No!” Alfred immediately denied. I couldn’t say whether he was telling the truth or not. 

“It’s okay. I know it wasn’t your fault.”

“You don’t get it. They... They want to end it all! They want to make us their slaves! We’re nobody’s slaves! Matthew is our leader. Most of us would never submit to those idiots of The Almighty.” 

A glint of triumph could be seen in Harry’s green eyes. I shivered slightly.

“I know you wouldn’t. You’re proud and too smart to give in to ex-Death Eaters.”

“They failed in the past, didn’t they? Just because they have a different name now it doesn’t mean they’ll succeed. I don’t believe in any of them. But most do. Some of the boys... Well, some need protection. And they’re very angry... But I won’t surrender. I don’t need anyone!” 

“I know.”

There was a brief moment of silence. Harry turned to Louis and told him something that made the man leave the room. Alfred freaked out when he saw the Auror walking away.   
“Where did he go?” Alfred asked trying to go after Louis.

Harry blocked his passage.

“Let me out! I want to see my brother!”

“Louis didn’t go after your brother,” Harry explained to him calmly.

“And you expect me to believe you?”

“I expect you to trust me. I’d like to offer you protection, Alfred.”

Harry’s voice was seductive. I would have followed him to the depths of hell if he wanted. Of course, Alfred wasn’t in love with Harry Potter like I was. The boy hated him. Harry represented the family he had lost. It was unfair and stupid. It was the Death Eaters’ fault. It was Voldemort’s fault. It would be more rational if Alfred held a grudge against me, not Harry. 

But since when people acted rationally when subdued?

“And in exchange I’ll tell you all our gang’s weaknesses, right?” Alfred grimaced.

“No, in exchange I’d like you to tell me a little more about The Almighty.”

Alfred gave his back to Harry and me. I looked at Harry and noticed he was watching me and not Alfred. Why? Was he still suspecting me?

“They can stay with me, Potter,” I said, surprising myself.

Alfred turned to look at me right away.

“I don’t want to stay! And I don’t want to go to that stupid foster home!”

“I don’t think you have a choice,” I told him. “You know you and your brother will be found if you go back to the streets. You can barely use your wand properly, if it is really yours.   
You can’t apparate. At least here you’ll be safe.”

“They’ll be safer in the Institution, Malfoy.”

“My house is safe, Potter! Besides, Astoria is here. She’s gotten quite attached to Angel.”

I didn’t know what I was doing. I was obviously being selfish. If I kept the boys with me, then Harry would have a reason to return. I was a horrible person, but I couldn’t stop myself. In that brief moment with Harry I had realised a strange improvement in my general state of mind. I didn’t feel so weak and scared. It was as if Harry gave me strength to get better. I needed him so much. It was a shocking discovery.

“I just want to go away...” Alfred mumbled.

“And where will you go, Alfred? Think about your brother. He’s fine here,” I tried to convince him. 

“He doesn’t even know you!”

“But you must have noticed the way he behaves around Astoria.”

It was a fact. The boys missed their mother. Astoria was perfect for the part. She was irresistible. Even Alfred had treated her nicely that morning. 

“Why do you want to keep them here?” Harry asked suspiciously. 

I couldn’t blame him or his distrustful look. 

“I feel responsible,” I shrugged.

It was partially true. Harry, however, kept staring at me fiercely. He didn’t believe a word I said.

“I’m not involved in any of his mess, Potter!” I tried to reason with him, knowing quite well it was pointless.

“It’s true,” Alfred said. I was utterly surprised. “I never saw Mr Malfoy before. And Travers called him a traitor in the Alley.”

“I was never part of their group. I had no idea there was such a group!”

Harry ran his fingers through his hair. He was thoughtful and bothered by something. That something was probably me. Eventually, he made a decision.

“Alright, you and your brother can stay here with Malfoy and his wife. I’ll send a Ministry official to formalize the situation. You are now responsible for them, Malfoy. I suggest you play safe. I’m also keeping my men here.”

“I told you the Manor...”

“It’s not safe, Malfoy, and you know that,” he cut across me. “When The Almighty realise you have the boys, they’ll come after you. They might already be planning a little visit.”

I should have let Harry convince Alfred to be taken to his Institution. What was thinking? I was sick. I was in no condition of getting myself involved in any of that mess. Even so, I just stayed quiet. I was going insane.

“Alfred, would you please think about everything I told you? Matthew is on our side, I promise you. He worries about you, and he doesn’t want any of you to suffer more than you already did. I’ll send him to talk to you as soon as I can. I hope you can tell me then the real reason you and your brother are being hunted.”

Hunted was a strong word, but it was true. I felt chills down my spine.

“Malfoy, I’ll be back. In the meantime, try to stay away from trouble. And if anything happens, talk to one of my men and they’ll instantly get in touch with me.”

He turned around and left the room. Alfred and I were left alone lost in our own thoughts. 

There I was, Draco Malfoy, a man who had spent almost twenty years without getting himself connected to any sort of serious trouble; a man who lived in complete isolation and would rather have his dogs for company. I was now a man who didn’t want the limelight. And yet my heart felt so much more alive now that Harry was back in my life. I knew he would come again because it would be necessary. 

I let out a sigh. Everything was horrible and wonderful at the same time. Deep down I was glad, though. 

Harry Potter would be back.


	7. Chapter 7

Harry didn’t show up the next day, but the security around the Manor increased. There were now four Aurors patrolling the grounds and watching out for any dangers. The number of protective spells got bigger also. My dogs seemed agitated, but I managed to keep them in line. 

Astoria didn’t say anything. As usual, she followed my lead blindly. And in the days that went by she took care of the boys perfectly. Whoever saw her with Angel would never say that he wasn’t her son. She was absolutely in love with the child. Even Alfred’s mood had improved. He still got angry easily, but around Astoria he behaved like a perfect gentleman.

As for me, I didn’t know what to feel. I thought Harry would come to the Manor frequently. I was completely wrong. He only got in touch with the Aurors, asking for news and sending them messages. He never spoke to me directly. Needless to say, I was pissed, which made me get worse.

I wanted Harry back, even if for a few seconds. I needed him like I needed oxygen, if not more, for without Harry around it hurt to breath. 

On the fifth day I had a pleasant surprise. I was in my room licking my wounds when Angel got in. I felt like asking him to leave but his green eyes cast a powerful spell on me. I didn’t have the heart to tell him to go away. He walked toward me kind of wary, but he smiled when our eyes met. My frozen heart suddenly melted and I smiled back involuntarily. It was impossible not to. Astoria’s fascination for him and the fact that she insisted on telling me everything Angel did every day even when I refused to listen became clear to me. Angel was indeed fascinating. 

“Are you okay?” he asked me gently.

I nodded even though I was lying.

“What about you?” I asked.

He also nodded, and cute dimples adorned his face when he smiled again.

We didn’t speak for a while. He didn’t look upset or edgy and neither did I. The silence we shared was the kind I liked to share with Astoria. It wasn’t bad at all. Just being together was enough. Angel seemed to understand. Having him near me made me feel calm. 

His tiny hand took something out of his pocket. It was a rather crumbled picture of a twenty-something woman who smiled and waved at whoever was behind the camera. Her mouth, nose, smile and brownish hair had Angel written all over them. Her eyes however, reminded me of Alfred’s. The woman in the picture was obviously their mother.

“Is she your mum?” I asked. When he answered me with a positive nod, I went on, “She was very pretty. You look like her.”

He smiled.

“She died.”

And so did my smile. 

“Yes, I know...”

My heart broke into small pieces. I wanted to hold him tightly, but I was afraid of being turned down.

“What was her name?” I asked.

“Melissa.”

So we finally had a name to go with her face. I didn’t find it prudent to ask for her last name. The boy was too young. I didn’t want to scary him away by asking too many questions. 

“It’s a very pretty name,” I said.

“Yes.”

I couldn’t resist the need to pull him into my arms any longer. He let himself be hugged. He was so small and fragile. I imagined Scorpius with the same age but without the protection of the Manor, or his grandparents to spoil him. I imagined him all alone wearing nothing but rags and starving on the streets of London. It could have happened. I felt an unbearable pain, and I wished I could go to Hogwarts just to see him.

After a while I let Angel go. Our eyes met once more. His eyes seemed to know me inside out. 

“Are we going to stay here forever?” he asked.

My smile was sincere. Angel and Alfred had been in my life for a small period of time, but they were already a part of my daily routine. I wasn’t bothered by their presence anymore. I’d even got used to Alfred’s mood swings and thought he was amusing. Perhaps I really wanted them to stay in my life forever. I was positive Astoria wouldn’t mind them staying, on the contrary. 

“Do you want to stay here forever?”

“Yes,” Angel answered quietly.

“It’s settled then,” I stated, and Angel showed me such a smile that my entire being was affected by it.

So the night came, and in better spirits I went down to have dinner. Angel’s enthusiasm as he filled his mouth with spoonfuls of food encouraged me to eat more than my usual share. After dinner we went to the main living room and played a wizard’s board game that Scorpius used to love. I was marvelled when I heard Angel’s laughter every time his enchanted doll overtook one of ours. 

When the clock struck nine o’clock, Astoria took Angel to bed. Alfred and I remained in the living room, each sat on an armchair, our eyes drawn to the firewood that slowly burnt in the fireplace. It was cold. I shivered a little.

“Did Angel tell you about our mother?” Alfred asked suddenly. 

I was almost asleep, but I woke up immediately.

“Did you ask him to tell me something?”

“No, but he likes you... I know he’s been telling Mrs. Malfoy stuff about our mother.”

That took me by surprise. Astoria hadn’t said a word about it. I grimaced. Astoria was that kind of woman. She would never break the trust of whomever it was, least of all of an innocent child. However, I got irritated. I was her husband after all. I should be informed of what went on in my own house. 

I decided to let it slide for the time being.

“Angel just told me your mother’s name. Melissa.”

“Melissa Brickwall. She was just a poor pathetic woman,” Alfred said with bitterness. I noticed, however, the melancholy behind it that he was trying to hide. “She thought my father’s family would come to her aid. But my grandfather was arrested and my grandmother had vanished from the face of the earth. I guess I have uncles. I don’t know if they’re alive.”

“What was your father’s name? What happened with him?”

“I think he’s dead because he’s not arrested, that much I know. His name is Joe Partride. He was a Death Eater, but not a very important one. He stayed with my mother until Angel was born. Then, when Angel was 2, he scampered.”

It was way too much information coming out of someone who until not so long ago had refused to speak at all. 

“Why are you telling me this now?”

Alfred turned to me nervously. He didn’t look like the confident teenager from before.

“Angel trusts you, and he’s good at judging people’s characters. Your wife is a nice person. She treats us with respect. Besides, none of you are pressuring us to do anything we don’t want to. You simply accepted our presence here. I know we’re trouble...”

“Well, this house has had its share of trouble. One more won’t make a difference,” I joked humourlessly. “You’re good boys, Alfred. I like having you here.”

The sudden confession took him by surprise.

“I... thank you. But we’ll have to leave soon.” 

His statement was proof enough that his demeanour had improved greatly. If Alfred had plans to leave, he would just take Angel and dash without saying goodbye. Even with Aurors all around us, I was almost sure he could make a successful getaway. Instead, he had warned me of his plans in advance. 

“You don’t have to runaway. If you tell us what’s going on...” I said.

“It wouldn’t make any difference,” he cut across me immediately.

“I wouldn’t be so sure. If there’s one person in the world you can count on, that someone is Harry Potter. I know you think he’s at fault here, but you know it’s not true.”

His eyes showed only pain and anger.

“But he didn’t help us before, did he?”

“He didn’t know about you. He’s trying to make amends now.”

“Now it’s too late.”

“No, it isn’t! It’s never too late unless you’re dead.”

“What exactly can he do?”

“We’ll never know unless you tell us why you’re being chased.”

There was a pause. I could see him struggling with himself. He wanted to tell me, but he was also afraid. I knew Alfred didn’t have anyone he could trust. He was quick to defend the leader of the Death Gang, but why hadn’t he stayed with him, hidden under his wings? Or had he escaped to protect those he called friends?

He started his tale with such a soft voice that I had to make a huge effort to listen to it. What I did hear kept me paralysed for a really long time. I didn’t interrupt him once. I just let him share his darkest fears with me. At first it was hard to believe that such a thing was happening. I wanted desperately to escape from reality. However, when he reached the end of his story, I knew he was speaking the truth and that I’d have to face it. 

“You’re going to tell him, aren’t you?” he asked in a whisper. He didn’t resemble the same confident teenager from before at all. He was now a fragile and frightened boy.   
He was right to be frightened. I surely was. Not that it was anything new. I was used to living like that. Anxiety and fear were my old friends. Nevertheless, I didn’t want the boys to go through the same thing. They were so young. I didn’t want to be facing another Draco Malfoy.

“I need to tell him. And before you say anything, I really believe it’s better to stay here. You and Angel will be much safer in the Manor. And Potter will protect you.”

“He will, but only because it’ll be convenient for him, right?” 

“No, he’s not that kind of person. Many years ago, when I wasn’t worth anything at all, he saved me. I was weak and I was not fighting by his side. I supported the wrong sort of people… Even so, he cared about me enough to save my life.”

He had saved me from the Fiendfyre. He had taken pity of my rotten soul. He could have let me burn but he didn’t. I deserved to die after everything I’d done.  
Alfred didn’t say anything. He got lost in his own world, probably trying to come up with a solution for his problems. Fortunately for him, his only solution was to trust Harry. He was just too young to realize just how big Harry Potter was to the wizarding world. His mind, just as mine, was filled with catastrophic predictions. But at least I knew Harry wouldn’t let us down.

As soon as he gave me goodnight I decided to call on Harry. It was my first time doing so. My heart beat madly at the possibility of seeing him again. Poor and stupid heart.   
I found one of the Aurors in the back patio. He was a pudgy man whose name was Barry. I told him I needed to see Harry urgently. I got to give it to Barry. He did try to hide his scorn as he told me Harry was probably too busy at the moment to talk to me, and that I should wait until the next day.

“Alright,” I told him in a tone a hundred times colder. “But don’t blame me if by tomorrow the Manor is all destroyed, and the boys are nowhere to be seen.”

Barry was white, and then red, and then he turned quickly and left me. He came back a few minutes later with another Auror, a very attracted young woman – too young to even be an Auror in my opinion. She smiled at me and said Harry was on his way. At least somebody in Harry’s Headquarter was polite. 

I didn’t have to wait for much longer. Harry showed up in my living room about twenty minutes later with Barry and the woman behind him. We stared at each other. I tried not to be impressed with his muggle outfit which only made him more charming and seductive. I tried not to drool at his dampish hair that showed signs of rebellion. Or his amazingly sandalwood scent that made me weak at the knees. Or his green eyes which haunted my dreams. Nope. I was a man on a mission. I had to give him the bad news and then watch him disappear from my life again. Or I could convince him that he could count on me somehow, hence spending more time in his company. Sweet, foolish dreams. 

“What happened?” he asked as composed as always.

His body language, on the other hand, told me another story. Harry was tense.

“I need to speak with you privately,” I said with a drawling voice, pointing at the other two Aurors.

None of them seemed to be very happy with the idea of leaving me alone with Harry. I almost laughed. What did they think I could do? I wasn’t a match for Harry. I’d never been a match for him no matter how much I’d tried to convince myself otherwise. I was older and wiser now. I knew how to accept my limitations. 

We were finally alone, and the silence was unbearable. 

Harry walked to where I was and stopped in front of me, his hands in his the pockets of his jeans that fit him so well. My eyes were invariably pulled to his lower parts. I felt my throat get dry. My eyes gazed at his perfect Greek god body and I found his green eyes throwing daggers at me. 

I wondered if he’d noticed the lust in my eyes.

“Malfoy? I don’t have all night,” his voice brought me back to our mundane problems. 

“Voldemort,” I said. The name came out with a lot of effort on my part. I always had the feeling Voldemort would appear suddenly if his name was spoken aloud. In fact, for quite a long time after the war I had horrible nightmares with the Dark Lord. His presence in the Manor had been too strong, and it’d lingered for many, many years. 

“What did you say?” Harry asked as if he hadn’t understood me. I knew he had. He just wanted to torture me. “What does Voldemort have to do with anything?” 

“Don’t you want to sit down? Would you like a drink?”

I didn’t mean to postpone our conversation. I was just too afraid of what I was going to tell him. 

“Just cut to the chase, Malfoy.”

Harry got closer. I thought I was going mad. Now my fear was mixed up with my desire. How would I survive such contradictory emotions? I needed to get out. I shouldn’t have called for Harry. But he was already there and he was so real. And intense. And I wanted to embrace him and never let go.

The absurd of the situation made me want to cackle madly.

“I need you to tell me what you know, Potter. I need your word that as soon as I finish what I have to say, you’ll also share information with me. Otherwise, I won’t say anything.”  
It was such a useless bluff. I would tell him anyway. Harry had no way of knowing that, though. As he stared at me with fierce eyes, I tried to remain pokerfaced.

“You’re not an Auror, Malfoy. Any information about my investigation is confidential.”

He was right. I made a face.

“Can you at least tell me if it has anything to do with the Dark Lord?” I insisted.

He ran his fingers through his hair messing them up completely. 

“Voldemort is dead, Malfoy.”

“Ah, but is death really the end of everything?”

“In Voldemort’s case, it is. You should know that. You were there when he died.”

“It was one of the most memorable moments in the wizarding world.” I smiled sadly as I remembered that day. It had also been one of the worst of my life. “Believe me when I say that I really don’t want to think of Voldemort coming back to haunt us, Potter.”

“But...”

“But I can’t pretend it isn’t a possibility.”

“I can guarantee you it isn’t.”

“He came back once.”

“That was different.”

“Because of the Horcruxes?” 

Harry just sighed. There was not enough information about what Harry had done before vanquishing the Dark Lord. He didn’t like to talk about it. There were a lot of rumours, though. One of them made reference to the Horcruxes, pieces of Voldemort’s soul spread in important magical objects. They had been quite the talk during his fall. According to some, their destruction had been essential to weaken Voldemort. 

“It’s not about the Horcruxes this time, Potter. I’m not sure whether this is good or bad.” Before he could stop me I went on, “Alfred decided to tell me his secret.”

“He told you?”

He was so surprised I felt quite offended. 

“Yes, he did. Is it so hard to imagine him trusting me?”

“It’s almost impossible,” Harry was brutally honest.

“Well, they’re here, aren’t they? In my house! Under my protection!”

“Don’t forget about my team of Aurors. And would you please stop running around in circles and just tell me what Alfred told you? You’re starting to piss me off!”

Great! He was mad at me. I hadn’t seen that expression in Harry’s face in years.

“Melissa Brickwall and Joe Partridge were their parents. Alfred thinks his father is dead, but he isn’t sure.”

“Joe Partridge...” Harry’s eyes became distant. “He was an ordinary Death Eater that disappeared after Voldemort’s fall. We could never find him. But Melissa Brickwall is a stranger to me, so I guess she wasn’t part of the group.”

“What about Partridge’s mother? Alfred told me she’s vanished too.”

Harry looked thoughtful. 

“If I’m not mistaken, we found her living with her brother in Poland,” said Harry. “She didn’t know where her son was. We watched her for a while. She died ten years ago.”  
“So you never found Joe Partridge.”

“He’s still on our wanted list, but he’s not dangerous. He was just a poor man who couldn’t get away from Voldemort’s influence. I didn’t know he was married.” 

“He wasn’t. Joe and Melissa only lived together. Partridge vanished when Angel turned two and he realised the boy could talk to snakes.”

Watching Harry suddenly turning pale didn’t make me happy. What I was about to tell him would only make the situation worse for all of us.

“Alfred’s joined the Death Gang when his mother died, but at the time Matthew’s little group was already being slowly snared by another group of cunning wizards.”

“The Almighty. I know that.”

“They found out Angel could talk to snakes a year ago. For a boy his age, he’s extremely skilful with magic. Some boys of the Death Gang reported the news to The Almighty group and they were ecstatic. Apparently there’s a prophecy...”

“Yeah, I know about the prophecy.”

Harry finally sat down, but far away from me. He looked worried and distressed. It was as if I wasn’t there. He was immersed in his own dark thoughts. I decided to go on even though he might not be listening.

“I don’t know the exact words of this prophecy and neither does Alfred. But The Almighty thinks it has something to do with Angel. The prophecy speaks of a child with extraordinary power, the kind of power found only in dark wizards. According to some, Angel is only a recipient. Until he’s 12, his soul is inclined to... possessions. But the magic behind it is way too dangerous. When Alfred heard what they planned to do with his brother, he ran away. He believes Angel will be used in a ritual to bring Voldemort back.”

Harry smiled bitterly.

“It isn’t Voldemort, Malfoy. Voldemort cannot come back.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“Because I do! I was the one who defeated him! Besides, Voldemort isn’t the one they want it back. It isn’t Voldemort they’ve been worshipping in Matilda Junian’s basement.”  
There was dreadful pause.

“Then being in her house wasn’t just to make a speech...” I said.

Harry nodded almost imperceptibly. 

I felt the most idiotic person alive. I thought I was helping Harry and that I knew something he did not. I thought I could make him need me. How could I be so innocent? So stupid? 

And yet I still knew something he didn’t. I was certain Harry hadn’t known about Angel, otherwise he wouldn’t have looked so taken aback.

“So they’ve chosen Angel... I’ll have to take him away from here, Malfoy,” Harry said.

“They’re not in danger here.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“It might have slipped your mind but the Manor was once used by the Dark Lord himself as his headquarters.”

Harry grimaced.

“How could I forget something so horrible? Still...”

“Why don’t you become my Secret Keeper? I’m willing to submit myself to it in order to convince you once and for all that my intentions are good.”

Harry looked at me as if he was trying to read my mind. I got the feeling he was trying to use Legilimency against me. 

“You’re wasting your time. It would be easier if you just asked me to open my mind to you. I wouldn’t refuse,” I stated casually. 

Another grimace.

“I’m not trying to read your mind…”

“Ah, so this piercing look can only be because of my radiant beauty,” I joked.

Harry stood up and once again stopped in front of me.

“Beauty? You still look like the living dead,” he declared.

“And you’re still a fucking gentleman.”

I stood up this time. We became face to face, eye to eye. I was a little bit taller than him, which seems to irritate him. I felt something change between us. There was tension alright, but it wasn’t the same as it’d always been. I felt tempted to lean forward and touch my lips with his. Harry, however, seemed so strange. I was certain he would turn away. To my utter surprise he got even closer. It seemed unintentional, like two opposite poles that could not help feeling attracted to each other. 

I didn’t dare to create false hope, but who said that it was possible to stop our illusions from building up?

“Potter...” I murmured.

It was enough to break the spell. He pulled away at once. 

“Don’t think you can use Legilimency against me, Malfoy,” he grunted. 

Ah, so that was what he thought I was doing. I guess it was better to be accused of casting a spell on him than cheap seduction. 

“I didn’t intend to...” Nope. My intentions were much, much worse actually. 

“Listen, I’ll send more Aurors to guard your house. In the meantime, be very careful.”

Harry was about to leave without saying goodbye. I crossed my arms but resisted the impulse to pout like a spoiled child. 

“If it isn’t the Dark Lord, Potter, then who is it?” I asked when he was with his hand on the knob ready to open the door. 

He stopped, but he didn’t look at me when he said, “It’s none of your business.”

“Try again,” I said coldly. “Because I still know something you don’t!”

I got Harry’s full attention with that. He let go of the doorknob and turned to face me.

“I pretty much doubt it.”

“I knew about Angel.”

“That’s because they’re here. What else can you know?” 

“Alfred knows what they are looking for. He knows what they need to start their dark magic ritual.”

“So I guess I should ask Alfred.”

“He won’t tell you anything, Potter. I know it’s difficult to accept, but you’re not every child’s hero,” I said with a sneer. “Why can’t you just accept my help?”

“Because I can’t shake off the feeling that I’m selling my soul to the devil,” he retorted.

Ouch, that hurt a lot. Why did he have to be so brutally honest all the time?

“I’m not the devil, but thanks for the compliment. Does it really seem so strange that I want to be informed of what’s going on?”

“Are you going to throw it on my face again that the boys trust you but not me?”

“No, I won’t,” I sighed. “But I’d like you to trust me.”

Harry bit his lower lip. My mouth watered. 

“As strange as it seems, Malfoy, I am putting my trust in you, aren’t I? Don’t ask me more than this. I don’t know what your intentions are. We are not friends. We cannot be friends. You know that. There are too many things between us...”

“I know,” I interrupted him before he could go any further. “I know. But maybe... Maybe I want to find a way to redeem myself. I know I wasn’t a saint, Potter, but neither were you. Not with me at least. You never gave me a chance. Since the beginning...”

He opened his eyes wide as if he could not believe what I was telling him.

“That’s it? You want to relive the past? You know you were a jerk since the beginning, Malfoy. If you hadn’t insulted the first person I had made friends with... If you had been a little less arrogant...”

I was the one to give my back to him this time. I wanted to hide my shame and humiliation. Even after such a long time I still couldn’t tell him I was sorry. I was still too proud. I still hated the Weasleys, now more than ever. They had Harry Potter. They’d always had him.

I felt out of breath. I wanted to run and hide. I felt my eyes filling with tears, and how humiliating would it be to cry in front of Harry Potter? I’d done it once with catastrophic results. I bit my lips. I had to be strong.

“I don’t think you know anything else, Malfoy. You’re just wasting my time...” said Harry in a whisper.

I could hear him walking away and opening the door. I also noticed his hesitation. It was enough to make me turn around and say, “They want the Book of the Dead. That’s how they intend to bring the Dark Lord back. They’re going to use the most ancient kind of dark magic there is.”

“I don’t believe you. And how many times do I have to tell you that it isn’t Voldemort they want back?” he practically growled. 

“Then who is it? Don’t I have the right to know? Shit, Potter! I’ve opened up my house for you! I let your men come and go as they please!”

“It’s Slytherin, Malfoy!” he dropped it like a bomb. “It’s the most horrible bastard that ever existed. It’s someone worse than Voldemort because Slytherin was a more sensible lunatic, if that makes any sense. But of course it will never happen. Besides, the Book of the Dead is nothing but a legend.” 

“Of course it is, and so are dragons and giants!”

“You know what I mean!”

“If I find where this book is being kept...”

“Do you really think you can do that?” he asked me disbelievingly. 

“If I find it, Potter, I want your word that you’ll let me go get it with you.”

“Are you insane? Even if this is all real, even if the book isn’t just a work of fiction, you can barely stand, Malfoy!”

“If I find it, Potter, I’m coming with you to retrieve it.”

“You are insane. That’s all I can say for the moment.”

And he left slamming the door.


	8. Chapter 8

Two things made me relax when my anxiety attacked me and I felt like I was stuck inside myself, desperate to simply be free, and that would be walking around my property with my dogs or play the piano. 

My father had never quite liked the idea of me on the piano. It was an activity for sissies in his eyes. My mother, however, made sure that I learnt it, and have learnt it well. The art of playing the piano, of running your fingers gently along the keys and creating perfect harmony is magic. It transcends one’s soul. It shapes it, makes it softer and more beautiful. At least that’s how I felt every time I played it.

With my soul torn, I sat on the piano bench and started to play Rachmaninoff, concert n.2. I let the music flow and overtake me. I didn’t have an orchestra behind me, but I could hear it anyway. I could hear each and every instrument as if they were a part of me. I let myself go hoping that the music would make me forget about Harry and the fact that I knew absolutely nothing about the Book of the Dead apart from what I’d read in some muggle and wizarding books. 

The Book of the Dead was an Egyptian artefact desired by all of those who appreciated magic or simply history. It was said that the book was written more than 3,000 years ago by a very powerful wizard of its time. The book had potions and incantations. It was supposed to be some sort of spiritual guide to life after death. However, some said it went beyond it. It was also a very dark magic book. It could bring back the dead provided you had an appropriate recipient – a body with a soul. It was not a book for the faint-hearted. It was as much of a taboo as the Unforgivable Curses. In the past, however, it hadn’t been. It wasn’t an evil book per se, or at least it hadn’t been designed to be so at first. There were far too many things in it that went beyond our knowledge. It went beyond pure and simple dark magic. Alright, it was not that simple, but it was powerful and interesting.  
The foolish muggles thought they had it, or at least part of it, in a museum in London. It was a 24 metres papyrus which contained wondrous things, but lacked the truly interesting bit: magic spells and potions that could make a person run away screaming or smile wickedly with delight. Or so they say. The whole papyrus was probably 50 metres long. It was obviously bigger and better. It was a door to another world. 

It had been found by none other than a muggle, but the truly magical part had been stolen by a wizard who decided that the book was too dangerous to be shared with the world and therefore should be hidden forever. What the muggles had was historically interesting, but it had nothing that could tempt a wizard to steal it. The part worth stealing was long gone. And I had no idea where to begin looking for it.

My only consolation was to know that The Almighty also didn’t know. I had turned to Burke for information once more. Although he had been his usual grumpy self, a bag of money performed miracles in the hardest of the hearts. He had assured me no one knew about the location of the Book of Dead and I believed him. I had been very generous after all. 

For now, I’d rather focused on my music. Perhaps I could get some answers from it. I was hoping each note would bring me some inspiration if not oblivion from everything else. A sudden noise distracted me. I looked around and found Angel observing me with his big green eyes. He looked startled to have been caught spying. I smiled. 

“Are you alright, Angel?” I asked softly to make him feel more at ease.

He nodded.

“Do you like the piano?”

“I do. I listened a few times when we lived next to the theatre in London...” he answered shyly.

My heart constricted at the thought. 

“Come here then,” I invited softly.

After some brief hesitation on his part, he sat next to me. I encouraged him to feel the piano keys with his little fingers, which he did almost reverently. He reminded me of Scorpius at that same age as he sat beside me and watched me play. Scorpius played as well, but he didn’t have the same passion I did for the instrument. 

I could see, however, that Angel showed clear signs that he was very interested in it. To my utter surprise, he played the first chord of the song perfectly. I was delighted.  
I played some more and was impressed with his ability to copy me. He seemed to feel the song as much as I did. Perhaps he lacked the delicacy, but he certainly had the talent. He was a prodigy. 

We smiled at each other. I played a few more difficult chords, and even though he got a little confused in the end he managed to copy me again perfectly. He was incredible.  
I started playing Pathetique, by Beethoven. It was a little less difficult than Rachmaninoff, but not less beautiful. After that we played Konna ni Chikaku de. It was softer, just like a lullaby. He followed me well. We left the melody overtake us. I smiled as I hadn’t in a long time. Angel’s sweetness and innocence made their way into my heart.

We got fully immersed in the melody. He won me over completely. Until that moment he had been nothing but a means to an end – keeping Harry Potter close by. Now I was really seeing him for the first time. I saw the fragile and adorable boy that he was, a boy people like Goyle wanted to turn into Slytherin. It was as surreal as both of us playing the piano together. 

I made a vow to protect him no matter what.

Astoria interrupted us a few minutes later and took him away to have tea with biscuits. I didn’t join them. I continued to play feeling thankful for my sudden peace of mind. How much I had changed in a few seconds. The piano was really magical, and it wasn’t even made by a wizard. 

I wanted Harry more than anything, but I didn’t feel the need to use the children just so I could spend some time with him anymore. Was I maturing at last? I sneered. Better late than never. 

“I had no idea you could play the piano,” said a voice behind me.

I missed the right key and my hands froze. I hadn’t noticed his presence at all, which was something completely unusual. I always knew when Harry Potter was around. I remember when he used to follow me around with his invisibility cloak in Hogwarts. I have to say, though, that he had managed to surprise me at times. I dreaded to remember that humiliating episode where he’d caught me crying in one of the toilets of Hogwarts. I shivered slightly as I thought of how close I had been of getting myself killed by Harry that day.

“What are you doing here? Don’t you think you should’ve knocked first?” I asked drily.

I turned to face him. His green eyes were shining brighter than usual, like something had touched him deeply. My music, perhaps? I wouldn’t dare think of something like that. But then again, I could hope, couldn’t I?

“Since when do you play?” 

It was quite typical of Harry to just ignore my questions.

“Since I was a child. Not that this is any of your business.”

“I didn’t expect you to have such a…”

“…softer side?” I finished for him.

“I guess.”

I hid my hands inside my pockets.

“What are you doing here?”

“Wasn’t it you who told me I could come and go as I pleased?”

Touché.

“If you’ve come to talk to the boys…”

“I’ve already tried. Alfred didn’t tell me much, and I don’t think Angel really realises that he’s in danger.”

“So you believe in me now?”

“I never said I didn’t believe you. I just said Voldemort wasn’t their target.”

He walked to the window and looked outside. His eyes seemed to get lost in the scenery. Mine took their time to admire his beautiful silhouette against the light.  
“The book in the British Museum definitely doesn’t belong to us wizards,” he said. “There’s nothing there that could be considered dangerous.”

“You didn’t have to go to the trouble of going there just to check it out. I could’ve told you that. Besides, Potter, if that old parchment in the muggle museum was really dangerous, do you think it would have been left there? Don’t you think someone would have stolen it by now?”

He sighed.

“We had to make sure, Malfoy. It’s the normal step in an investigation. I guess you wouldn’t know that as you’ve never worked in your life, have you?” he provoked.

I frowned. It was partially true. It hurt to hear him saying it, though.

I stood up angrily.

“Do you think I spend the whole day doing nothing? My family has a lot of businesses.”

“Oh, yes. Lucius Malfoy is a stockholder in many wizard companies, and even some muggle ones! How he got hold of them, however, is something to be fully investigated, especially the muggle ones.”

“I thought your super-heroes in the Aurors Squad had already investigated the Malfoys.”

“Your father is a master in dirty businesses.”

That was undeniable. I was actually envious of how clever my father was when it came to breaking the law. I’d tried to be like him, but I’d failed miserably. Nowadays I couldn’t care less about that kind of lifestyle. I didn’t wish for fortune, power or fame anymore. I didn’t wish for glory or the wizarding world at my feet. Nope. All I wanted was Harry Potter.

I guess I’ve always wished for the unattainable. 

“Did you come here to talk about my father?”

“No.” Harry got next to me. He looked exhausted. “I came here because I need to make some things clear. I don’t know exactly what you’re planning...”

“I’m not planning anything. Can’t I just play the good Samaritan for once?”

“Things have never worked like that between us, Malfoy.”

“Well, that’s how I want them to work now.”

“Don’t you see how absurd that is?”

“Listen, Potter,” I bravely walked to where he was standing and stopped in front of him. “I really don’t want to live through another war. Even if Slytherin does sound like a pleasant alternative over our current...”

“What are you talking about?”

Harry was angry. He crossed his arms and glared at me.

“The wizarding world has never been better, Malfoy,” he started. “The crime rating is the lowest in more than forty years. Our laws have never been fairer. The taxes are...”

“Yeah, yeah, I know, Potter,” I cut across him quickly. I really didn’t want to hear his passionate speech about the wonders of the Ministry of Magic. “If you don’t take the Death Gang into consideration, I guess our world is indeed safer with you in charge of the Aurors Squad. 

I made a pause. If my father could hear me now, he would certainly disinherit me in the act.

“Shacklebolt is a very good Minister,” I said and I hated myself for admitting it. “Nobody would dare say something otherwise.” 

“Not to my face, at least.”

“Definitely not. But this is neither here nor there. I’m doing this to protect those boys.”

I stopped talking as I literally was at a loss for words when my eyes got lost in his.

Harry was staring at me with such intensity that I was finding it difficult to have any coherent thoughts.

“Are you trying to use Legilimency against me again?” I asked suspiciously.

“You stun me sometimes,” he said to my utter surprise. 

“That’s news.”

“I thought you’d be overjoyed at the thought of having Slytherin back in charge. I thought you’d join your old friends and become a member of their super powerful group.”

I made a face.

“I think that being ‘overjoyed’ is a little too much,” I stated.

“You know what I mean. I’ve been watching you.”

That pissed me off and pleased me at the same time. I was a paradox.

“You’re not part of their group. I’ve turned your life upside down these last few weeks,” he informed me without any shame whatsoever. Then again, that he would investigate my life once again should not be such a surprise. I was still upset, though.

“I’ve discovered some interesting things about you, things that have intrigued me. For example, I’ve found out that you’ve barely left the Manor in quite a while.”

I gave my back to him and went to stand next to the window. I felt my face burning. I was so embarrassed I could die. Had he found out about everything? Did he know about my feelings? I put that idea aside. Of course he didn’t know. It was impossible. It would be way too humiliating if he knew about them.

“You’ve been seeing a psychiatrist.”

“I’m on vacation at the moment,” I tried to sneer unsuccessfully. 

“I know you’ve been suffering of some sort of magical deficiency caused perhaps by those psychiatric problems you’ve been facing all these years.”

“That’s all classified information!” I exclaimed in outrage. “How did you find out about it?”

I knew I was probably very pale. My stomach turned and I felt dizzy. I closed my eyes. If the darkness came to get me I’d welcome it. I would do anything to escape that unpleasant moment.

Harry Potter was without a doubt the new Dumbledore. He knew absolutely everything that went on, just like the old man!

“Malfoy.”

“How did you find out?” I insisted.

“I’m an Auror. It’s my job.”

“That information is highly classified, Potter! Or at least I thought it was... I think you really can’t trust anyone...”

I was going to kill my psychiatrist, Azkaban be dammed. 

“Your psychiatrist told me nothing,” he said as if he knew exactly what I was thinking. “Besides, how I found out is irrelevant. The thing is...”

“What do you mean it is irrelevant? Are you mental? It’s my private life we’re talking about!”

“I had to make sure you weren’t involved with The Almighty! And believe it or not, I do believe you are not involved with them. And I believe you actually care about those boys!” 

My eyes went wide and my heart started beating like mad. 

“So you see… I’m starting to believe in you, Malfoy,” he continued. “Besides, Alfred and Angel like it here, I can tell. I suppose it does help to have a wife like yours. She’s nothing like I imagined her to be.”

“And what was that exactly?”

He grimaced as if wondering whether he should tell me or not.

“I imagined her to be just like you.”

“And that’s a bad thing because...” I sneered.

He laughed but there was no humour in it.

“Do I really need to answer that?”

I could guess exactly what his thoughts had been about Astoria. Everyone thought she was a female version of me. They couldn’t be more wrong. 

“Anyway, the thing is, I appreciate your help, but...” he started again.

“Are you serious? That’s it?” I interrupted him. “You appreciate my help but you want me to step back?”

“Dammit, Malfoy, would you shut up and let me talk?” Harry said extremely irritated. 

Unfortunately I did what he asked. I was an idiot.

“I don’t want you to get involved in this,” he stated.

“I’m already involved, Potter, whether you like it or not!” I replied.

“You’re in no condition to help at all, Malfoy! Have you looked at yourself in the mirror lately?”

I don’t know if he meant to hurt me or if he was just trying to make me face reality. I think he meant for both. I glanced at my image in the big mirror hanging above the fireplace and I saw that he was right. I was white, almost translucent. I was also terribly weak and thin. My old charm was long gone. It was humiliating.

Harry stopped inches behind me. We stared at each other through the mirror, lively green eyes against faded grey. I bit my lower lip. Harry opened his partially. If I turned suddenly and kissed him, what would he do? I could be finished but I wasn’t dead. My desire for Harry was stronger than anything else, even my weaknesses. 

“I’ll be your Secret Keeper. The boys can stay here,” he said at last. “But that’s it. Forget about the Book of the Dead. It doesn’t concern you. Let my Squad take care of it.”

I slowly turned around. Our bodies almost touched. I shivered slightly. I hoped he thought I was just cold. 

“Great,” I said surprising myself. “Just for your information, I’m going to adopt the boys.”

Harry opened his eyes as wide as he could. I had caught him completely unaware. It felt good.

“Don’t you think you’re getting ahead of yourself? Or have you just made that decision after finding out about Angel’s connection with Slytherin?” Harry asked suspiciously.

“Honestly, Potter!” It was outrageous. “If that was really the case, I’d have already turned him to The Almighty! I know it’s hard for you to accept that I have feelings. I like the boys! I’m a father! I love my son! Every time I look at Angel and Alfred I think about Scorpius and what kind of situation he would be in if I hadn’t made it! If I had been arrested or killed, Scorpius would be just another lost child in the hands of those bastards!”

I was standing up to Harry. I felt more alive than ever.

“Say what you will, but I will adopt them!” I went on. “And if I have any information about the Book of the Dead, I’ll go after it! I don’t care what you say. I’m still alive, you know?”

“Still? What does that mean? What is really wrong with you?” he asked, and he seemed genuinely concerned for my well-being. 

Well, well, well. And what did that mean? Before I could say anything, however, Astoria showed up. 

“Draco, honey, would you like anything special for dinner or...”

Her soft voice died away as soon as she saw Harry and me standing only inches apart from each other. We were both angry given our arguing, and our faces were red. I feared what she could be thinking. Thankfully, Astoria wasn’t the type to make a scandal or say anything inappropriate. Although she was a little flushed – as was I as well – she simply smiled and apologised.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know Mr Potter was here. I should have knocked.”

“It’s alright.”

“Yes, I was about to leave anyway,” Harry said. He was back to his old self. I envied his ability to quickly dismiss his embarrassment. “Malfoy,” he called my name looking straight at me. “Forget about everything.”

“Oh, really?” I crossed my arms in a way I hoped was threatening, but it was rather childish.

“Really. Think before you act. Don’t do things just to piss me off.”

Alright, I was guilty. But I really wanted to adopt the boys. The idea didn’t seem so frightening anymore. I liked them. Was it that unbelievable?

Harry didn’t say goodbye to me when he left, but at least he greeted Astoria on his way to the door. Astoria stared at me with curiosity.

I sighed. I felt drained. I sat on the nearest armchair and covered my face with my hands. Astoria got worried and she quickly came to sit next to me. I had to let her know about my impulsive decisions. And so I did.


	9. Chapter 9

By nightfall I was a nervous wreck and I had trouble sleeping even after taking the Sleeping Draught. Surprisingly, by the next day I found myself more energetic and with my head full of ideas. 

Astoria and I talked about our intentions with Angel and Alfred. Angel’s amazing green eyes sparkled brightly as he listened to the idea of becoming our son. Alfred, on the other hand, seemed rather taciturn and disbelieving. I couldn’t blame him. He was a teenager after all. Besides, his life hadn’t been easy. Adults were not to be trusted in his world. To make matters worse, I was an ex-Death Eater. 

I gave them plenty of time to think about things. Angel’s decision was immediate and rather sweet. He put his arms around Astoria and hugged her as tightly as he could. My wife almost cried her heart out. 

Alfred didn’t say anything. I knew he would need time to make his decision. We would have to prove to him that we honestly cared about them because just a few days ago we’d been nothing more than strangers. 

The next step was to call my parents and tell them the news. After pondering about it, I decided to skip that part for the time being. I wasn’t in the mood to receive a furious Lucius in the Manor telling me I’d lost my mind for good. 

My mother’s reaction wouldn’t be any different, or so I thought. I wasn’t really sure. My mother had become more understanding over the years. Still, there was the matter of Scorpius’ inheritance. I knew for sure my father would think of my adoption as a betrayal to Scorpius. I wasn’t ready to face him and his angry accusations yet. 

I left the boys with Astoria and fetched three house-elves to help me do something I’d thought about the previous night while tossing and turning in bed. I’d decided to go through some of my grandfather’s old possessions to see if I could find anything about the Book of the Dead. My grandfather had been a great dark magic lover and collector. Even though the Aurors had confiscated a lot of our stuff in the past, we had kept some rare ancient books and old family correspondences that were in a hidden chamber in the library.

I had fun thinking about Harry’s reaction when he finally realised that the Auror responsible for inspecting the raid in my house after the war - a man who was now retired – had been properly paid up by my mother to leave some things behind. 

It wasn’t easy to get into the chamber. I knew the spells that protected it all well, and I knew how to get past them without much effort. The main problem I think was the dust, something that even magic didn’t seem to be able to get rid of. I looked at Swan, our main house-elf, with a glare. She let her ears down and looked at the floor as if ashamed. She should be. She was being paid now to keep an eye on the others so they did their cleaning well. 

And before somebody could call the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures, and quote the Hermione Granger Law for House-Elf Protection, you should know I’m very fair with mine. Against my father’s will, I paid them a salary and gave them days-off. They even had a right to go on vacation! To be honest, I felt some affection for Swan, our ‘governess’ house-elf. She came with Astoria after our wedding. Astoria was very fond of her and vice-versa. Swan was loyal, and I was sure she would work for us on the old terms. She was a true jewel and had authority over the others. And, well, I wasn’t as heartless as before. Although I had followed on my father’s footsteps most of my life and treated the house-elves like scum, I knew better now. Living and learning. 

When we were finally inside the room, I told them what to look for. We started our arduous task: separating any books or correspondences which mentioned the Book of the Dead. I spent practically the whole afternoon reading old yellowish letters. All of them were very interesting. Some were even dangerous. A book tried to bite one of the house-elves. Another one screamed so loudly that one of the Aurors showed up at the library immediately with his wand ready. I sighed and then I ordered Swan to undo any misunderstandings. 

It didn’t work. The pudgy Auror, who I could never remember the name, tried to enter the chamber without any success. The man went berserk. He talked to his peers and left the library after some time.

I watched everything on the inside. On the outside I could imagine how frustrated they were for looking at a wall without seeing anything. I heard them grumble, but I refused to let them in. I smiled wickedly and it must have been scary because the house-elf by my side shivered a little bit. 

I forgot about everything else when a rather thick letter came to my attention. It was from a friend of my grandfather who had spent his vacation in Egypt in 1930. But before I could read it my hiding place was rudely invaded. 

All my senses became fully alert. I felt something at the tip of my stomach, and my mouth went dry. Slowly, as if I didn’t really care, I folded the letter and held it tightly in my hands before turning around to look at Harry. I should have known he would be called here. I guess deep down the whole point of annoying his Aurors was to get Harry here in the first place.

I wasn’t surprised that Harry had gotten into my hideout so easily. He was the truly Almighty here, the Great Harry Potter. He could do anything. 

“Should we arrest him, Mr Potter?” asked the pudgy one. 

I raised my eyebrows.

“And what would the charges be?” I asked as I crossed my arms. 

“It’s alright, Barry. Can you wait outside?” Harry asked with a soft but commanding voice. 

Barry left the room, but not before sending me the evil eye. Harry and I were left alone with only the house-elves as witnesses. I felt my breath being taken away.

Harry ran his eyes through my secret chamber. His hands touched some of the books that were on the mahogany table. I followed with my eyes as his fingers stroked the leather covers. It was torture to my senses.

“What are you up to this time, Malfoy? For somebody as sick as you, you’ve been quite energetic lately…” 

I grimaced. 

“What can I say? That I can’t help it? Is that a good defense? Besides, I’m not really doing anything. I’m in my own house. What’s the problem with that?”

“Well, let’s see...” Harry got a little closer, but not enough to let me intoxicated, just enough so that his perfume could invade my nostrils and tease me a bit with his manly scent. “For starters, you’re in a secret room full of old parchments and suspicious books... And my men told me they heard some horrible noises coming from here.”

Harry looked at the house-elves as if he expected them to be hurt. I felt extremely offended.

“Like I said before, Potter, it’s my house. I can scream like a Banshee if I desire to and nobody has anything to do with it!”

“Oh, so you were the one who screamed? That’s quite a nice hobby you have, Malfoy.”

He was trying to piss me off, and it was working rather well. Bastard! I felt my blood boiling. Why was it that only Harry Potter could make me feel this way?

He got even closer, the sneaky bastard. It was definitely hard to breath now.

“What are you doing?” he asked in the same soft tone of voice that I knew was hiding something else entirely.

“Spring cleaning.”

“Of course you are. What have you got in your hands?”

I held the letter tighter and shrugged. He gave another step in my direction. Was the room shrinking by any chance? I swallowed hard. Another step, then another, and next thing I knew we were only a few inches apart from each other. 

As a skilful Seeker, he quickly tried to take away the letter from me. However, I’d been a Seeker as well. Perhaps I hadn’t been as good as Harry, but I also had quick reflexes. I managed to move away from him. I wasn’t so quick to hide my flustered face and my heavy breathing when our bodies touched and our mouths got so close that for a moment I thought about leaning in and kissing him. 

I was out of my mind.

“What’s in the letter?” he asked.

“It’s none of your business.”

“Oh, really?”

How come the idiot didn’t realise he was dangerously close to me? Wasn’t he aware of what he could do to me? The insensitive prick! 

“I can just confiscate everything that’s in here, Malfoy.”

“Of course you can. You’re the Great Harry Potter. You can do everything you want,” I whispered. Maybe my voice sounded too sexy for my taste. 

Harry raised a brow. He tried to take the letter away from me one more time. Honestly, it was becoming quite childish. 

“You don’t need to get heavy on me, Potter. In case you’re wondering, you can use spells. A simple one ought to do it.”

Was it just me or did he seem to be having fun? With a smile, Harry finally got the letter. Curiously, he didn’t move away at all. He kept torturing me with his body as if he knew exactly what kind of power it had over me.

His green eyes left mine for a minute to unfold and read the letter. I sighed. I supposed I could use a spell of my own to steal it back. It would be rather pathetic, though, if I suddenly felt down from exhaustion in front of him. I would never humiliate myself in such a way. So I let him read it even though I had no idea what was in it.

It was funny to observe the different reactions on his face as he skimmed it – surprise, distaste, extreme distaste, and finally contempt. 

“So that’s it...” he said it at last. “You were looking for clues about the Book of the Dead.”

My heart began to beat really fast.

“Didn’t I tell you to stay out of it?” he insisted.

“Didn’t I tell you I wouldn’t?” I replied.

“You’re so stubborn, Malfoy! I hope you’ve at least changed your mind about the things you said to me yesterday.”

“Why would I? I said I would do it and I will! I always keep my word! And don’t look at me like that! Besides, I already told Astoria and the boys about it. Angel is very happy.”

Harry sighed, “I hope you know what you’re doing. Adoption is quite serious.”

“I am being serious, Potter! I wouldn’t joke about something like that!”

“You’ll be in great danger.”

“More than I am already? Anyway, could you give me back the letter now that you’ve finished reading it?”

“I’m sorry but I need it.”

That made me lose my temper for good. I sent caution through the window and cast Accio to get the letter back. It flew towards me, but before I could put my hands on it, Harry got it back with a counter-spell. Spells be damned. I decided to get physical with him. It was a lousy idea, for many reasons, one of them being that Harry was stronger and healthier than me. We felt down and the house-elves got frightened. It was not difficult for Harry to subdue me. My wrists were held to the floor by his strong hands. Our bodies were now touching one another completely. 

“Don’t get cocky. You’re not strong enough,” he muttered. 

“The letter belongs to me!”

“Not anymore. You should’ve been more discreet if you didn’t want anyone to know what you were doing.”

“Just remember something, Potter. Wherever you go, I’ll go with you.”

He looked at me with astonishment.

“Was that a threat or a new kind of pick-up line?”

I laughed nervously. My heart would certainly come out of my chest at any moment.

“It’s a fact. I’m going after the Book of the Dead,” I stated.

“Stop being so thick-headed!” 

“Stop teasing me then!” 

He was even more surprised now.

“I’m not teasing you.”

“Yes, you are!”

Silence. My body began to show signs that having Harry on top of me was making me quite a happy man. I panicked and tried to escape. Harry just locked me in his arms tighter. He was having fun at my expense. I wonder if he would find it that funny to have my erection brush against his leg. 

“Potter...”

“Malfoy...”

It was only for a second, but I could swear I saw desire in his eyes, which were shining as brightly as jewels and were making me feel all mushy inside. His eyes seemed to be telling me to capture those soft lips with mine and just let myself go.

It was official now. I was very excited and I knew Harry could feel just how much. I expected him to push me away and act properly shocked. However, he did nothing. He only stared at me with those bloody marvellous eyes. Could a person have an orgasm just by being looked at so intensely? In a few seconds I’d probably know the answer to that.

I decided to take my chances. To hell with everything else. My lips parted and I made my move. I brushed them softly against Harry’s lips, and it was enough to make him stand up quickly as if an Unforgivable Curse had hit him. 

I didn’t know whether I should laugh or cry. Perhaps both.

“This isn’t funny,” he finally said as his fingers touched his lips absently.

“It wasn’t meant to be funny,” I muttered, standing up as well and staring at him without shame.

I was shaken, though. Harry’s green orbs were now as cold as ice. However, as I stared at him intently, I realised things were not as they seemed. I was almost positive that he was as shaken as I. The difference between us was that he was much better at pretending to be fine. I, on the other hand, could not stop my hands from trembling.

“This game is becoming quite dangerous...” Harry muttered. 

I raised a brow. 

“Game? And who’s playing here exactly?”

He smiled bitterly. 

“Life’s really strange,” he started mysteriously. “We were apart for so long... But now it’s started all over again.”

“What has started again?” I asked. I was confused and irritated. “Why don’t you stop talking in riddles and just say what you really think, Potter?”

“Because it isn’t such a good idea.”

“Harry...”

Calling him by his first name definitely got to him. Was I getting the signals right? Was he interested? And did it mean that we... Perhaps in the past... I couldn’t even think about it.  
Harry’s bloody mobile phone rang and interrupted us. I clenched my fists to try to stop my anger. I wanted to curse the damn gadget, explode it into tiny little pieces. It only got worse when I realised who was on the phone with him. Ginny Weasley.

Harry didn’t say much. He just listened, and when he finally said something it was in such a low voice that I doubted even Ginny could hear him. 

As he turned it off, our eyes met. We were so stupid. The biggest one of all was me, of course. For a brief moment I had actually believed that Harry wasn’t as indifferent to my feelings as I thought he was. And maybe, just maybe, I wasn’t all alone in my unhealthy obsession.

It was all just a dream, though. I needed to pull myself together. What I’d read between the lines could not be the truth. It simply could not. Because if it was... What would happen to me if our attraction was mutual and real? What would happen to us?

“Potter, I think that...”

“It’s time for me to go,” he cut me off. “I’m taking the letter with me.”

“Wait a minute. You can’t simply...”

“I’m taking everything else too.”

And what was that exactly? He’d take all of my possessions as well as my heart and soul? 

If Harry thought I would just let him go he was seriously mistaken. He had no right to just take away what was mine without an injunction from the Ministry. Without a care in the world, I cast a spell on the door and locked it before any of the Aurors outside could even realise what was going on. 

“Are you really going to make things difficult for me?” Harry asked with his wand already in his hand.

I smiled wickedly. Of course I wouldn’t make things easy for him. I was already being way too nice and he hadn’t even thanked me for it. I gripped my wand tightly. I wonder for a moment what had happened to my old wand, the one which had been taken and subdued by the man in front of me. Harry Potter had even taken away from me my bloody wand. I was never the same without it. As far as I knew, Harry and my old wand had gotten along splendidly. And how ironic was that?

“Do you really think it’s wise to use magic against me?” he asked with his eyebrows raised.

Once again I realised he was having fun. I cast a spell on the bastard, but it barely scratched him. Knowing that he wasn’t taking me seriously only made me angrier and I lost it. I would not give up until one of my spells hit him somehow. 

He easily deflected from all of them. In fact, at every spell I cast, Harry seemed to grow stronger while I was growing weaker.

In the end, the whole room got semi-destroyed, with papers flying all around. The house-elves were long gone. I heard Aurors shouting at the other side of the door. I couldn’t help to think that Harry needed better agents. 

Finally, I fell down on my knees. My magic had exhausted me. I hadn’t cast that many spells in quite some time. I closed my eyes and felt Harry’s presence next to me. I tried to push him away but I was too weak. Harry just took me in his arms. My last thought before I passed out was that dying in Harry Potter’s arms wouldn’t be so bad.


	10. Chapter 10

I woke up with the world spinning round me. I smiled as I thought that metaphorically the world had always revolved around me in one way or another. My dizziness was only a confirmation of that. 

“What’s so funny?” asked a hoarse voice beside me.

I opened my eyes at once. My sight, however, was a bit blurry. I turned my head around slowly. I felt tremendously sick. I spotted Harry’s silhouette against the light. He was sitting on a very uncomfortable hospital chair. Great. I was in St. Mungus. 

“Do you know where you are?” Harry asked coming forward.

Interesting. Harry was worried, I could tell. I kept smiling, which only made him confused and irritated. 

“Malfoy, are you okay? Were the drugs too strong?”

I wanted to laugh, but before I could do or say anything I heard Astoria’s voice from behind him.

“Is he awake? How is he?”

I made a face. I didn’t want Astoria and Harry in the same room. She knew too much. I was afraid that she would let something slip. Although Astoria was a discreet woman, it was better to be safe than sorry.

“I think he’s a big groggy from the medicine and it’s not making much sense. Oh, wait, he’s always been like that,” he said with a smirk.

“Ha-ha, Potter,” I replied in such a throaty voice I wondered if I was the one speaking at all.

“I’m going to call the Healer,” said Astoria.

“It’s not necessary,” I tried telling her, but she had already left.

I blinked for a few times. I was finally able to see things more clearly. I looked at Harry, who was staring at me with angry eyes. I trembled slightly.

“What is it?” I asked.

“As the Head of the Aurors Office it is my duty to inform you that you are under arrest for attacking me and also for being in possession of forbidden articles,” he started all business-like. I raised a brow. “Unfortunately, your wife’s already paid your bail. You must, however, be in Court on the set date to answer to the charge of n. 50 and 138. Because of your circumstances, I’ll recommend house arrest as your penalty.”

“Is this a joke?” I asked. House arrest? I didn’t even leave my house! “Oh, I get it. You’re doing this so I won’t follow you when you go after the Book of the Dead. Good luck with that, Potter.”

Harry sighed heavily and he clutched his fists. I didn’t know why he was so mad. None of my spells had affected him in any way. All I’d managed to do was damage my own legacy, something that would make my father furious when he found out.

“This isn’t a joke, Malfoy. Your wife told me your Healer has forbidden you to cast heavy spells! Don’t you know you might drain yourself in such a way that you may never recover? You can lose your magical powers!”

Oh, I knew that. I avoided thinking about it, though. I’ve been losing my powers for a long time. I didn’t know why. No one did. There were theories, lots of it. My psychiatrist, for instance, had a very brutal one involving Harry. But at that particular moment I didn’t feel like talking or even thinking about it.

“Is it my fault?” he asked quietly, almost making me suffer a heart attack. “Is it because I took your wand from you all those years ago? Did it traumatize you or something? I still have it. I can give it back to you. Or I can let you take it back if that helps somehow.”

It was unusual for Harry to behave in such a thoughtful way towards me, to say the least. In fact, it was kind of creepy. For a moment I thought I was actually dreaming the whole think, and the medicine they’d given me was making me hallucinate. 

I cleared my throat.

“Even though I miss my old wand,” I said in a low voice, “what happened so long ago has nothing to do with my current state.”

“Are you sure?”

No, not at all. As a matter of fact, I had wondered many times before if my problem wasn’t linked to Harry Potter. I had discussed it endlessly with my psychiatrist. We believed it had everything to do with him. But if I said it aloud, would it change anything? I was happy that Harry was showing such concern for my well-being, which made me consider telling him what I really thought. My heart was full of hope. It was pathetic, but it couldn’t be helped. And yet, I couldn’t say anything.

“Don’t be so conceited, Potter. Not everything is about you,” I stated. 

If he insisted on the matter, as flattering as it was, I would hex him. I didn’t want to delve into the subject any longer. 

Luckily, Harry kept quiet. He just stared at me for a long time as if trying to know what was going through my head. He looked at me as if he had never seen me before, as if I was a puzzle to be solved. The Great Harry Potter was perplexed and I was the cause of it. I felt as though I had accomplished something very important. 

Then I realised something.

“Do you still have my wand?” I asked, baffled. 

He shrugged like it didn’t matter. Bastard! 

“I thought you were going to get rid of it,” I insisted.

“Why would I do that? It’s a good wand.”

“You don’t need it.”

Was it my impression or did Harry Potter just blushed? I opened my eyes wide. My heart was overjoyed.

“Does it matter? I said I can give it back,” he said trying to look aloof.

The offer was tempting. I did miss my old wand. The first one was obviously unforgettable. It mirrored the wizard’s soul. It was not a coincidence that mine had been taken away by Harry and subdued to him so easily. Perhaps my wand was destined to be his all along. Perhaps my wand was my love declaration. I wonder if he had ever thought of that. I felt like laughing hysterically. 

“Maybe I do want it back,” I said, looking the other way. I didn’t want him to see the excitement in my eyes. 

“Good.”

“Good.”

Silence. All I could hear were steps coming from the corridor. I thought somebody was going to enter the room, but no one did. Harry and I were completely alone. 

“I...” we both said at once.

I smiled. I saw Harry’s lips open up a little bit, but he immediately got stiff and serious, as if he was afraid I would misinterpret him. 

“How do you expect to come with me after the Book of the Dead when you are clearly sick? I’m not your babysitter, Malfoy. Besides, this isn’t your business but mine. You’re not part of my Squad. You’re not an Auror.”

“I know. But I want to help. I know you don’t believe in me...”

“I don’t know what to believe anymore,” he interrupted me. “But I know that you’d be much more helpful if you just stayed out of it.”

“I can’t do that,” I replied.

Harry breathed hard. He was probably counting to ten, too. 

“I’m going to Egypt in a week.”

“I’m coming with you.”

“And how exactly are you going to achieve that?” he snorted. “Lying on a hospital bed with an IV attached to your arm?”

I shrugged.

“I’ll be fine until then.”

“If you come after me I’ll kill you myself.”

I smiled.

“Promises, promises. You could’ve killed me in the past... You actually almost succeeded. Besides, Potter, if you really wanted me to behave like a good boy, you wouldn’t have told me about your plans.”

He seemed slightly surprised as if he had just realised that. I grinned. I guess my smile caught him unguarded, for he did not reply as I was expecting.

“You are such a...” he started but didn’t finish.

We were interrupted by the arrival of my Healer, followed by Astoria, Angel and Alfred. I was annoyed. Why was it that Harry and I were always interrupted at the most crucial moments? 

I forgot about Harry for a while when Angel appeared next to me with a worried look. I stroked his face tenderly. 

“I’m alright,” I said.

“I wouldn’t say that,” the Healer stated as he examined me. I glared at him, but the man didn’t seem to care and just laughed it off. “Don’t worry. There’s nothing a good day’s rest can’t cure. Mr. Potter will have to wait awhile if he wants to arrest you, though.” 

It was a humourless joke. Angel and Alfred opened their eyes wide and their concern for my health increased. I was touched that even Alfred seemed worried about my wellbeing.  
“I’m not going to arrest Malfoy,” Harry said quickly as he saw Angel looking scared. “We just have a... date in court to solve the problem.”

I couldn’t help but laugh.

“A date, Potter?”

Harry went totally red, which made him incredibly adorable. He mumbled something I couldn’t get and left the room as if he was being chased away by demons. I was intrigued. 

The Healer was gone after informing me about the marvellous powers of a good rest, and he left me a prescription. My personal Healer was not around but he would get in touch as soon as he could. 

Astoria squeezed my hand. 

“You gave us quite a fright. What were you thinking?”

Her pretty face was slightly contorted with fear. I felt guilty.

“I wasn’t thinking.”

“Are you going to be okay?” asked Angel, looking at me with his big green eyes. 

“You’re an idiot for worrying my brother like this!” exclaimed Alfred aggressively.

“Don’t be rude, brat! I am going to be fine,” I retorted, then turned to Astoria, “I hope you haven’t said anything to Scorpius.”

“I haven’t. But he’s sent a letter. He’s doing quite well in Hogwarts,” she smiled.

I felt my heart getting lighter. I missed my boy so much. Perhaps I should visit him before going to Egypt. Then again, perhaps I should not. Scorpius was a very clever boy. He would suspect of something wrong if I just appeared at Hogwarts out of nowhere. Parents didn’t go to Hogwarts unless they had a very good reason for it.

I was convinced to stay in bed. I spent two days in hospital, and when I finally went back home I was spoiled rottenly by everyone. I confess I liked being the centre of attention. Even my dogs seemed to have missed me. 

We spent the afternoon in the gazebo watching Porthos, Athos, Aramis and D’artagnan playing around with the boys. The weather couldn’t be more pleasant, and the sky was incredibly blue. 

I had a lot of fun with Angel. The boy was really special. His sweetness had won us all, even the crankiest of the Aurors guarding us. The elves were absolutely delighted to have him around, and they spent a great part of their time helping Astoria watch over him. He was adorable, but his angelic face hid a very naughty boy, so he needed someone keeping an eye on him 24/7. 

I smiled as I watch him play with Porthos and Aramis. It was good to be a kid. An invisible force squeezed my heart as I thought of Angel and Alfred living on the streets of London having for company rebel young men without any real life perspectives. I felt a bit ashamed of my own spoiled childhood.

“Are you really going to adopt us?” asked Alfred after coming to sit next to us.

I glanced at him and then answered, “I’ve given you my word, haven’t I?”

“Only because you pity us,” he retorted distastefully. I could tell, however, that it was just a defensive mechanism. 

“Malfoys pity no one, dear boy. You’ll end up learning that since you are joining the family.”

He stared at me as if I was delusional. Maybe I was. 

“I’m going to be a Malfoy?”

My smile was not so pretty. Being a Malfoy had meant the world to me, but that was ages ago.

“Isn’t that the purpose of adoption, to welcome you into the family?”

His countenance darkened. He crossed his arms and looked at his brother.

“I was just asking…”

In the beginning I thought Alfred was very much like Harry. Now, however, I was changing my mind. That irritating posture, those defences he’d carefully built around him, the arrogance… He was just like me. Even his hair, which was supposed to be brownish like his brother’s were now a pale shade of blond, just like mine. He probably bleached them as a sign of rebellion. I wonder if he wasn’t really my son. I smirked. 

“What’s so funny?” he groaned. 

“We are very much alike,” I stated.

He arched his eyebrows.

“Are we? What d’you mean?” there was doubt but also curiosity in his voice.

“I was also an arrogant brat.”

“I’m not arrogant! And I’m certainly not a brat!” Alfred immediately answered back.

“Of course you’re not. It’s just the image you show to the world. Deep down, you’re just afraid.”

He grunted. “Afraid? I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m afraid of nothing!”

I sneered. Angel’s happy screams distracted us for a moment. Then I heard Alfred ask as if it wasn’t important, “Were you afraid?”

I sighed. What was the point of lying anyway?

“I was.”

“Of what?” I could feel his immense curiosity behind his question. 

“Of life...” And of Harry Potter. “I was raised to boss people around, not trust them. Potter was the first to challenge me, the first to question the world I lived in.”

My mind wandered to the first day my friendship was turned down by the one who would become my world from then on. 

“You trust him,” was the statement.

I closed my eyes. I hadn’t trusted Harry, but I had wanted to. Now he had me wrapped around his finger.

“It’s not easy to trust people, but Potter is someone who would take pity on his enemy and even help him in the end. You can trust him.”

“He’s an idiot then. I don’t trust idiots.”

According to his way of thinking, I was an idiot as well. As if that fact was any news to me. Hearing it from the mouth of a brat, though, annoyed me.

Our afternoon tea went by smoothly. The elves brought us a huge basket of scones and different types of muffins to Angel’s delight. I could tell that Alfred was also content, even though he tried really hard not to show. I pretended not to notice them feeding the dogs under the table. Kids would always be kids after all.

We returned to the main house together. Angel, who by now had almost completely lost his shyness, was speaking nonstop about his adventures around the Manor – which were always closely watched by two Aurors, but also by Astoria. Out of the corner of my eyes I saw Alfred smiling at his brother. He looked so peaceful that I couldn’t help but smile too. 

As we reached the backdoor, though, he went stiff. I followed his eyes and found Harry’s.

“Shouldn’t you be resting, Malfoy?” he asked crossly. 

I frowned.

“I didn’t know you’d become my private nurse, Potter,” I teased him.

The outrage on his face was priceless. I wanted to tease him some more, make him as angry as I could manage so I could kiss him later. Just like a schoolgirl in love. Ridiculous, Draco! Get a grip of yourself! I was lucky nobody could hear my stupid thoughts. 

I was still shaken by our almost-kiss. For that brief moment our lips had met, I saw heaven. My mouth still burnt at the memory, wondering what it would be like to kiss Harry properly, to feel his tongue touching mine, to hold him. Would it be heaven or hell?

“We thought a little fresh air would do him good,” said Astoria. “And it did, right? Draco’s face has a lovely colour now, don’t you think?”

Harry looked at Astoria as if he couldn’t believe she had just asked him that. I think Astoria always managed to surprise Harry in one way or another.

“He looks less like a ghost now,” said Alfred with his usual charms.

In a way, he was trying to be nice. I hid a smile.

“We need to talk,” said Harry, ignoring the chit-chat.

“Wasn’t I supposed to be resting?”

“Our conversation won’t take too long.”

My only concern was staying in the same room with Harry without having a heart attack. A part of me was afraid of being alone with him. The other part, however, was more than willing to face his green eyes.

Astoria, the boys and the dogs went one way. Harry and I went the other. When we were finally alone, I took a deep breath to keep calm. It didn’t work. My heart was beating violently in my chest. It would be difficult to control myself around Harry. It was almost impossible to remain impassive, especially when I was starting to believe that Harry might not be as indifferent to me as I once thought. 

Maybe he was just curious. My desire for him had become quite clear that day. Who could tell what was going through Harry’s head at this point. The worst part wasn’t the forbidden desire between enemies. It was the fact that we were both married, with kids. An affair was a terrible idea.

I often wondered what Harry’s marriage life was like. He and Ginny gave the impression of being the perfect family, the kind that makes one want to vomit. What if it wasn’t true?  
“Things have become more complicated than I first presumed,” Harry started.

Oh, yes, things between us were certainly very complicated. But that was old news.

“The hard truth is that right now I need you.”

Huh? My heart literally stopped and I think my soul left my body for a moment, perhaps to try and understand what he had just said. That was the reason why I missed the rest of his speech, and when I finally came back to earth Harry was staring at me angrily.

“So?”

“So what?” I asked slightly dumbfounded. Bollocks.

Harry’s sigh spoke louder than words. 

“Do you think you can get ready by the end of the week?”

My confused state was such that Harry only got angrier.

“Did you hear a word I said? Dammit, Malfoy! This isn’t going to work!” Harry started pacing impatiently. “I wasn’t happy to find out that to put my hands on the Book of the Dead I’d need your help, but what am I supposed to do? Hermione made it quite clear when she said that only a Malfoy can open the chamber where the book is, and only a Malfoy can break its curse. Others will be pulverised, and I’m guessing they meant literally. I told her I wasn’t afraid and that you are in no condition to...”

“Wait a second!” My mind was working miles per hour.

I sat on a bench nearby and stared at the floor. My eyes were lost somewhere else. I swallowed hard. Harry Potter needed me because only a Malfoy could break the curse of the book. My eyes went wide open and I looked at him. Before I could help myself, I smirked.

“Malfoy...” Harry’s voice was threatening.

“So that’s why you need me.” 

There was a hint of victory in my trembling voice. My eyes were probably sparkling madly with deep satisfaction. That was my moment of triumph. So Harry Potter didn’t need me like I needed him. But at least he needed my help. It was a huge step. Would I be able to hide my excitement? 

“You really didn’t hear a word I said, did you?” 

No, not really. But what did he expect? Listening to Harry Potter telling you he needed you was enough to leave anybody dazed and out of words.

“Could you start again? I got... distracted.”

Harry made a face.

“The stuff we got from your secret room, or the little that was left after you had your fit, was really helpful.”

So they had confiscated everything. Astoria hid that fact from me. Needless to say, I wasn’t happy. My father would be even less.

“There were other letters exchanged between your grandfather and Diggus Clark. In one of them, Clark found out how to get the book from the hideout in Egypt, and he demanded your grandfather’s presence there because he was the only one who could break the curse of the book. It seems that the book was left there by another Malfoy, and the dark magic used to protect it could only be broken by a Malfoy. However, your grandfather discovered that Diggus wasn’t really the respected wizard he thought he was, so they ended up breaking their association.”

“He killed Diggus, didn’t he?” I asked already knowing the answer.

“Yes. You seem to know your family well.”

I felt like showing him the finger, but I realised it would be rather childish so I held myself back.

“You found everything out through the letters?” I asked with mistrust. 

“Of course not. I am investigating the case after all. We suspect your grandfather ordered someone to kill Diggus, but there isn’t any proof. There’s also the fact that your grandfather didn’t set foot in Egypt before or after that. He most likely thought that what Diggus told him was not true. Diggus was only after his money, so the whole thing could have been just a big scheme to rip him off and he found out and dismissed it all.”

“But if it was just a scheme, then why...?”

“A little before Abraxas Malfoy got sick, he received some news again about the Chamber, this time from a very reliable source. The curator of the Cairo museum, Illius Mubarak, sent him some interesting news about it all. Through hieroglyphs they found out that the Malfoys’ blood was needed to open the place where the book was hidden. The clues end there. Abraxas died a little afterwards and so did Illius. He was hit by a powerful curse as he tried to open a tomb. The location of the chamber was lost.”

“Then how are we supposed to find it?”

Harry’s smile was so large and bright that it almost blinded me. 

“I have my sources.”

“So you know where the chamber is?” I didn’t want to sound impress, but dammit, I was. 

“I know of people who can help me locate it.”

I frowned. Not that I really cared. What I really wanted in all of that was a chance to be near Harry, as pathetic as that was. Spending some time with him in Egypt would be glorious, with or without the Book of the Dead. 

Part of me wanted the adventure. It was a way to prove to the world – and to Harry in particular – that I was worth something. I was the key to save the wizarding world this time. I was elated and so was my ego. But then I realised something that made me terrified.

“Does The Almighty know of this?” I asked. 

“They know that the book is in Egypt. They also know somebody who can give them some information about its location.”

“Do they know about the Malfoys?”

Our eyes met and I was certain that Harry knew where I was getting at.

“I don’t think they do.”

“You think?”

It was my time to pace nervously about. 

“I’m going to Hogwarts and I’m bringing Scorpius home. I can’t leave him there. He’s a Malfoy. If The Almighty knows about Egypt, they will certainly go after him. He’s an easy target since he’s only a child. I will never let that happen.”

I would never let my son experience an ounce of the hell I had to go through with the Dark Lord.

“Would it help you calm down if I told you that your son is being carefully watched?” Harry said.

I stood still. Harry was now just a few steps away from me. I was definitely disturbed if I hadn’t realised until that moment how close he really was. 

“Don’t worry. Your kid is safe,” he said with a certainty that impressed me.

“I’d be much more at ease if you were personally watching him.”

He looked at me in a strange way.

“I’m flattered by your trust, but I also trust my men. Besides, I have an agent spying for me from the inside of The Almighty group. I’ll be the first to know if they decide to attack.”  
I took a deep breath before I could send Harry to hell.

“I don’t like it. In fact, it actually makes me more upset to know that! We both know what can happen with spies, Potter.”

Harry gave one more step in my direction. Honestly, he was playing with fire. I crossed my arms. Was he trying to make me dizzy with his smell? I wouldn’t be that easily deceived. I wasn’t that vulnerable to his charms, at least not when my son’s life was at stake. 

Breathing, however, did become a little bit complicated, and when Harry’s scent made its way inside my nostrils, I felt slightly intoxicated. Sexy bastard. 

“What if I told you that Albus is also in danger?”

“Albus? Your son?”

He nodded affirmatively. I was baffled. 

“Why? What does your son have to do with it?”

Harry’s countenance darkened as if just remembering the subject made him upset. 

“Scorpius is Albus’ best friend, and from what I’ve heard, they’re always together. Therefore, if anything happens to Scorpius, it might also happen to Albus.”

That was some news. Scorpius had never even mentioned Albus Potter. Then again, why would he have said something about it in the first place? The boy had grown up listening to his grandfather complaining about how insufferable Harry Potter was, and how much “daddy” hated him. I avoided talking about Harry in front of him. It wasn’t strange at all that Scorpius had decided not to tell us that his best friend was none other than Albus Potter. 

Wasn’t life damn funny? My son succeeded where I had failed. He managed to gain the loyalty and friendship of a Potter. I wanted to grin, but in the current circumstances, I was in a state of shock. 

“I need a drink,” I said.

Harry had the audacity to laugh.

“What’s so bloody funny?” I asked angrily. I knew exactly how he was feeling but I wouldn’t let it show.

“Sorry. That was exactly what I said when I found out.”

We looked at each other knowingly. It wasn’t really difficult to accept our sons’ friendship. It was just extremely odd to picture it, to say the least. 

“Do you understand now why Scorpius is safe?” 

I made a face.

“This is quite surreal, Potter.”

“More than us?”

And what exactly did he mean by that? My heart raced. 

“The fact is, Malfoy, that you’ll have to come with me to Egypt, even though the idea doesn’t please me in the least,” he went on. “Do you think you’ll be feeling better by then?”

I took a deep breath and nodded. Of course I wouldn’t be a hundred percent well, but I would do anything to be Harry’s partner in that journey. Perhaps I could even try something that I didn’t believe much, but that muggles seem quite fond of: acupuncture. I felt chills down my spine at the thought of needles on my body.

Another point had to be clarified.

“What about my father?” I asked.

I was afraid that Lucius already knew about everything, or worse, that he was involved with The Almighty. Although he had promised us not to deal with dark magic anymore, one could never be sure, especially when the said group wanted to bring back Slytherin, an idea that I was sure my father would find interesting.

“Your father is being carefully watched, too. He won’t go anywhere.”

I frowned.

“Even though he’s in France?”

“We have an agreement with the French government. You see, Malfoy, we’ve always been watching Lucius Malfoy. Do you think we’d just let him move out of the UK without doing anything? Your father knows that if he steps out of line he will go back to Azkaban, and this time he won’t have the right to an appeal.”

The glint in Harry’s eyes was merciless, and the way he clarified things to me was enough to assure me that Lucius could not be involved with The Almighty without the Auror’s Squad knowing it – and putting a stop to it.

“Alright.”

Just in case, I should speak to Lucius. I could not delay that conversation any longer. The mere thought of it made me cringe.

“Did you think of using my father on this mission instead of me?” I asked him.

Harry sighed.

“The idea crossed my mind for a second. Unfortunately, Lucius Malfoy is the type of person you cannot depend on.”

“But I am?” I couldn’t hold my tongue. Being the only one to be able to help Harry in that situation went to my head.

He only smirked.

“Let’s just say it’s less... complicated. Besides, aren’t you the one who said that you are way too involved in all of this to be left out of it?”

Indeed. Life was certainly strange. A Malfoy had the power to recover the Book of the Dead and save an innocent kid from becoming Slytherin. A Malfoy who was weak and insecure and that loved Harry Potter. 

“I think you’ll need this,” said Harry taking me out of my reverie. 

He had my old wand in his hands. My eyes sparkled like jewellery. Seeing it now I realised how much I had missed that part of me. My hands trembled with the need to touch it. Harry held it out for me. I took a step forward. We were now only centimetres away from each other. I felt as if there was an electrical current surrounding us.

I took it in my hands. Harry was still holding it. I felt a pleasant tingle though my body as we touched. My eyes searched for his, which were staring at me intensely. My wand seemed to have created a powerful connection between us, and I wonder if he could feel it. This wand didn’t belong to me anymore. It had bowed to Harry’s greatness and became as much in love with him as I was. I couldn’t blame it for leaving me so easily.

Blue sparkles came out from its tip. Harry and I both opened our eyes widely. There really was some powerful energy flowing between us. I think Harry could feel it too because he instantly let it go, thus breaking our connection. Having my wand all to myself wasn’t the same. It was now just an ordinary wand. It wasn’t mine anymore, and I guess it would never be. It was pointless trying to make it mine again. It was like trying to ask for my heart back. I made a face. I was getting rather sentimental around Harry.

I sighed loudly.

“It doesn’t belong to me anymore, Potter,” I said ready to hand it back to him.

“Maybe we should duel.”

That was a ridiculous idea. I wasn’t in any condition to duel with Harry Potter and he knew it.

“It won’t be for real, Malfoy,” he went on as he saw the look on my face. “Just so you could it win it back properly. Perhaps...”

“Perhaps. But my wand has been in your possession for ages. I think it doesn’t recognize me anymore as its owner.”

“Are you kidding me? Didn’t you feel something when I gave it back to you? I did.”

The truth was revealed. He had felt something when we touched the wand together. Glory, Alleluia!

“What did you feel, Potter?” I pretended not to care.

It was Harry’s time to frown.

“As if you didn’t know, Malfoy. As if you haven’t felt it too.”

The air around us became suddenly very dense. The way he said my name made my knees turn to jelly. Damn Potter. What was he trying to do to me? I felt my face heating up.  
He got closer again. I lost the capacity to breathe normally. His hands touched mine. Everything around us disappeared. I forgot who I was. All I really wanted was to close the distance between us for good.

He took the wand from my hands and then stepped away. He looked at me from the opposite side of the garden and pointed the wand at me. I suddenly became very aware of myself and my surroundings.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“Take out your current wand. You’re going to disarm me with it.”

He was using his best Chief-Auror voice to order me to do it. I sneered.

“Are you serious?”

“Just take out your wand, Malfoy.”

“It isn’t going to work, Potter.”

“We won’t know unless we try it out,” he said shrugging.

“I’m not recovered yet.”

Was I scared? Of course I was. Stronger spells drained me quickly.

“You’re just going to cast a simple disarming spell, Malfoy.”

What was simple to him was not so simple to me anymore. However, maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to just try it out. Would it be that easy to have my old wand back? I doubted it. I remembered when we used to duel at Hogwarts. We had disarmed one another many times, but our wands had kept their identity. 

“This isn’t a real duel,” I stated.

Harry breathed hard.

“Do you want us to duel for real? Very well, then. Take out your wand. Now.”

He was challenging me. A duel with the Great Harry Potter. I almost pouted, but as soon as I put my hand on my current wand and aimed it at him, something grew inside of me. Our first duel in Hogwarts came to my mind. I’d had him there for a second by suddenly conjuring up a snake. Nobody knew at the time that Harry could talk to them.

“What are you waiting for?”

Good question. Perhaps I was waiting for a divine sign of some kind. I took position and a wave of excitement filled me up.

“On three?” he suggested. “One, two...”

“Expelliarmus!” I shouted before he could finish. Blame it on the Slytherin that still lived inside of me.

I guess I got way too carried away. The idea of duelling with Harry left me way too excited. The spell came out stronger than it should, and the wand did fly back to me, but Harry was thrown to the floor. 

I didn’t have time to celebrate the fact that my wand was pulsating in my hands. I ran to Harry thinking that he was probably fuming and that I’d definitely suffer the consequences. When I got to him, I knelt down by his side and got the surprise of a lifetime. He had a huge smile on his face.

“How about now? Are you feeling stronger?” he asked me still lying on the floor, his green eyes shining.

I smiled back at him. I tried not to, but his smile was contagious. How could I resist him? My old wand did make me feel different. Perhaps I wasn’t feeling stronger, but I was definitely feeling more confident. I had my old friend back. I knew that if Harry claimed it, it would come back to him. But right now it had accepted me back, and that should be enough. I gripped it hard.

“Thank you,” was all I managed to say, and for a Malfoy that was saying a lot.

Harry sat down. We got lost in each other’s eyes for a long time. Somehow we ended up with our faces closer.

“Do you have a guest room available?” he asked in a whisper. 

My heart almost came out of my chest.

“Of course I do.”

“Would you mind if I stayed here until we’re ready to go to Egypt?” 

It was the most wondrous, surreal and scariest request I’d ever heard coming out of Harry’s mouth.

My voice simply disappeared. What I actually wanted to do was tell him that he could have my bedroom if he liked. What would he say if I asked him to sleep with me?  
Better not take any chances. I didn’t know what his intentions were, but I was sure it wasn’t going to bed with Draco Malfoy.

“Malfoy?”

I cleared my throat hoping that it would help me regain my voice.

“Of course I don’t mind. I thought you would. Why do you want to stay here?” I managed to ask. 

Harry didn’t smile this time. In fact, he became quite serious when he said, “I need to make sure that you will be better until then. And maybe... maybe I should stay and help you out a little bit. You seem kind of rusty.”

His words were magical and they almost made me melt. If Harry wanted to stay in the Manor, so be it. I was his.


	11. Chapter 11

I couldn’t sleep that night for obvious reasons. Harry Potter was in the room next to mine. I leaned my head on the headboard of my bed wondering if he was already asleep.  
Harry had gone to London and then came back to the Manor bringing just a backpack. Astoria didn’t say anything. She simply smiled at him and immediately took him to one of the many rooms in the Manor, which turned out to be exactly next to mine. I smirked as I remembered Harry’s face when Astoria told him that ‘Draco would be right there in case he needed anything’. 

It was hard to tell what was going through Astoria’s mind. It was even harder to imagine what was in Harry’s head when he bid me goodnight, and if he thought it very strange that my wife and I didn’t share the same room. 

The Manor was now fully protected. We had two Aurors on patrol, though it wasn’t really necessary as we were already protected by the Fidelius charm. My biggest concern was Scorpius’ safety, but Harry assured me he would keep him safe. 

My other concern was Harry in the other room. It wasn’t much as a concern as it was a torment. I glued my ear to the wall without even realising it. I thought I heard something, a kind of a soft moan. Or perhaps my imagination was just running too wild.

I closed my eyes. Imagining Harry in bed was driving me insane. How long didn’t I feel the touch of another human being? Sadly, it’s been years. I didn’t miss sex. Not really. But if Harry was my partner, would it be different? 

I had slept with Astoria for a few years after we got married. The sexual act had been satisfying but rather empty. As time went by we decided to sleep in separate rooms so we could have more privacy, and our sexual life ceased to exist. 

And yet now my body seemed to be on fire, and all because of the man next door. I unbuttoned my silk pyjama shirt and I threw it on the floor. I ran my fingers down my torso, which was horribly skinny. I was far from being attractive. However, I wanted to be desired. I wanted to feel desire. More than anything, I wanted Harry Potter to want me. I pictured his hands touching me instead of my own. They were strong hands; hands of someone who knew how to touch and protect. Hands of a Seeker. Those imaginary hands were squeezing my nipples and torturing my soul. I thought I felt his tongue encircling them. I let out a strangled moan.

The hands caressed my navel. My cock got extremely hard. I was feeling so alive. It’s strange to think of it now. I’ve been punishing myself for years for everything. My mind was my executioner. My body suffered the consequences of it.

But not tonight. Tonight I wanted to join the stars. I wanted to forget about everything and focus only on Harry and the pleasure he could give me, even though I knew it was all an illusion. 

My hand finally stroked my cock. I shuddered. I haven’t done that in so long. All I could think of was why not, if the pleasure was so intense. Wasn’t pleasure the fuel of life? I have denied myself too many of life’s pleasures. 

I began to caress my stiffness, and Harry was there again, tempting me, showing me what I had been missing. I licked my lips and my eyes fluttered. I gave my imagination wings. Harry moaned with me while attacking my body with his mouth and tongue and fire. He bit my nipples and kissed me passionately. 

I wanted everything. I wanted him on top of me, in me. Fire burned my entire being. It consumed me. I no longer had control over myself. All that matter was that powerful sensation that I could fly. 

My desire grew so strongly that I thought I heard Harry moan on the other room. It was a deep, desperate moan like my own. His voice was throaty, sexy, masculine. I bit my lower lip. My body shook. The ending was bliss. It was a mixture of colours and sensations. I went to the moon and back. The proof of my desire spread all over my belly. I didn’t want it to end, but it was inevitable. 

“Harry,” I whispered.

And then the sad post-ecstasy came. It was even worse because I was all alone. I felt lazy. I should get up and clean myself, but I didn’t want to get rid of what I saw was proof that I was alive. In the end I just couldn’t take feeling all sticky. I risked a spell. It came out perfectly. Since I was already exhausted, it didn’t really matter. 

Exhaustion overtook me as it didn’t in quite a long time. Soon I was fast asleep, and I wished for sweet dreams. I was awoken suddenly by a loud noise and a curse. Harry. I ran to his room immediately clutching my wand tightly.

I opened the door, wand at the ready. I was prepared to duel and die if that was what it took to save Harry’s life. It was quite an accomplishment for a Malfoy. 

What I saw, however, was not complete destruction or dark wizards ready to pounce. There was only Harry on the floor, and naked. I wondered if I was still dreaming, and if that was the case then I surely did not want to wake up at any time soon. I stared at his fit body trying hard not to drool. Harry was a sight to be seen. His strong thighs let me salivating. I felt like running my hands all over his body and making it my main dish.

Sweet illusion.

His green eyes were very surprised to see me at first. Then he showed annoyance – and perhaps something else I was unable to identify. With the dignity of a true lord, he stood up, and with the towel in his hands he wrapped it around his waist, depriving me of ogling at his private parts. I didn’t notice until then that he had just come out of the shower. His jet-black hair was dripping on the Persian carpet. My mother would have freaked out if she had been there. She would worry about the carpet being ruined. As for me, I couldn’t care less as long as Harry was naked and wet. I sneered.

Harry’s face got red. I suppose my face wasn’t that different. I could feel it burn in a mixture of embarrassment and desire. 

“Shouldn’t you knock before entering?” he asked me defensively. 

I put down my wand feeling a tad silly. Then I frowned. Although I was still dazed by his amazing hot body, it didn’t mean I was speechless. Not yet anyway.

“I heard a noise. I got worried,” I explained. 

I didn’t know why I bothered. I was in my own house. 

Harry shrugged. Bastard!

“I had a small problem, but it wasn’t anything serious,” he said nonchalantly. 

“It wasn’t?” My eyes scanned his body, but this time it wasn’t for lustful purposes. 

There was a very ugly scratch on his left arm and the reason for it was right next to Harry, lying smashed to pieces on the floor. He had bumped into one of the grotesque statues that a relative had insisted on giving us for Christmas last year. The statue, which was supposed to represent a naked woman, was now completely broken. I was actually thankful for that as I have always hated the bloody thing. A satisfying smile adorned my lips. One statue down, three more to go. 

“Should I pay for the horrendous creature I’ve just destroyed?” he asked me merrily.

“You actually did me a favour. But you didn’t have to almost kill yourself in the process,” I added.

He sneered.

“And here I was thinking that you left them in my way on purpose. You’ve got a horrible taste for art, Malfoy.”

I smiled.

“Why would I attempt against my saviour’s life? Besides, I didn’t buy these things. They were given to me by Astoria’s relatives. It would have been rude not to accept them.”

“I guess it would be difficult to donate them as well. Who would want any of them?” he joked.

I got near him without even realising it. I touched his bruised arm carefully and he shivered slightly. His breathing caressed my face. 

“What do you think you’re doing?” he asked.

“Taking a look at your wound. I feel responsible.” 

I pointed my wand at his wound and he instantly pushed me away.

“Are you crazy?”

I sighed.

“Actually, I’m good at this kind of spell.”

It was true that I hadn’t practised it for some years, but I had made good use of it when Scorpius was younger.

“That’s not the issue. You’d better not overdo it. You’re still recovering,” he berated me. 

I was touched.

“Thank you for your concern, Potter, but I think I can do this without killing myself.”

“You’re my key to the Book of the Dead, Malfoy. I need you alive and kicking. Well, not really kicking... I’m sure you get what I mean.”

I made a face. The illusion that he cared for me was shattered. He could at least try not to be so rude with his host, or better yet, his key. I sighed audibly. 

“What do you suggest we do then?”

Harry looked at me as if I was the most idiotic person in the world. He walked toward the bedside table and got his famous holly wand. Then he pointed it at his bruise and healed it without uttering a single word. Harry was still young and yet he could already be compared to Dumbledore. He was amazingly powerful. It fascinated me to think of how powerful he would be when he was older. Unfortunately for me I would have to follow his greatness through the newspapers, if I lived long enough that is.

“I think you’ve hurt yourself on purpose just to impress me with your amazing power,” I smirked.

I was really impressed, but I would never let it show.

Harry laughed.

“Do you think I’m that powerful?”

There was provocation in his sexy voice. Damn him!

“Aren’t you?”

He just shrugged. “I’m just trying to do my job well.”

We were silent for a while. I should have gone back to my room but my feet seemed stuck. I was also having difficulty to look away from Harry’s naked chest. 

“You’re so skinny, Malfoy,” Harry said catching me off guard. 

It was only then that I realised I was shirtless. I felt like covering myself like some medieval damsel.

“Your wife told me you don’t eat much.”

I opened my eyes wide. Since when were Astoria and Harry exchanging confidences? And what else had they talked about?

“My wife seems to have forgotten about the word ‘discretion’,” I muttered distastefully. 

“It’s my fault. I had to know more about you and your illness so I ended up putting her under pressure a little bit...”

I didn’t like that at all. Although Harry fascinated me, I would never forgive him if he bothered Astoria. She was, after all, my partner.

“Don’t worry. I’m a gentleman,” he said probably to soothe my murderous intents. 

I made a face. I could imagine Astoria melting away under Harry’s charms.

“What else did she tell you?”

Harry hesitated and he wasn’t quick enough to hide it. I liked it even less.

“Potter? What did she tell you?” I practically hissed.

I felt cold, but it wasn’t because of the weather. The cold was coming from the inside. I crossed my arms. Harry got closer as he felt my discomfort. I could feel the heat irradiating from his body. I wanted to draw him closer. My desire to draw nearer was so strong that I took a step forward. Curiously, Harry didn’t step back.

“She just told me a little bit about your routine,” he muttered, placing his hand on my forehead.

I shivered. It was the first time I felt Harry’s touch on my skin with such tenderness. I was shocked.

“Since we’re going on a mission together, of course I care about your well-being.”

His strong hands cupped my face. I opened my mouth like an idiot, as if I was waiting for a kiss. I was definitely dreaming.

“You’re a bit feverish.”

Who was the idiot now? Of course I was feverish, but not because I was sick. I was feeling like that because of him.

When Scorpius got sick, I remember Astoria touching her forehead with his so as to measure his temperature. Afterwards she would kiss it gently. For an instant I imagined Harry doing the same with me. Our mouths were so close that our breathing was mixing together sweetly. I let myself go. My eyes got lost in his. I felt inebriated. I licked my lips.

His hands left my face. I felt empty. I missed his touch.

“You’d better go, Malfoy.”

I really should. And yet I didn’t want to. Why wasn’t he putting more of a distance between us? It seemed to me that Harry wanted me to stay. He kept standing there, right in front of me, looking at me as if I were made of glass. My heart was beating madly. His green eyes seemed to be full with desire. I couldn’t just be imagining everything. Could I?

I tried saying something, but Harry had managed to let me at a loss for words.

“I’m serious. Thanks for the sudden chivalrous impulse, but I think you’d better get some rest. After all, we’re leaving for Egypt in a few days. The sooner we go the better.”

How could he be so practical at a time like this? I sighed. 

“I hate when you’re right,” I managed to say.

“Which is always, you mean.”

Bastard. I smiled involuntarily. As if by some miracle, Harry smiled too. It was getting harder and harder to leave the room. I wasn’t sure of what was going on between us, but there was definitely something there, and I didn’t want it to end so soon.

“Potter...”

“Malfoy...”

I heard a song on the background. I thought it was the soundtrack of our moment together, but it was in fact Harry’s bloody cell phone. I swore to myself that one day I would destroy the annoying gadget. 

Harry immediately put on his “mask” again, and his voice was low when he answered it. I noticed, however, that his tone was rather sweet. It was probably Ginny on the phone. I hated them both.

That was reality. A slap on my face. Without even saying goodbye, I went back to my room. I had no desire to sleep anymore. In fact, I was wide awake and angry. Harry was messing with my head and I didn’t have the courage to face him and ask him to stop playing games with me. Being the bastard that he was, he probably enjoyed making me suffer. 

I felt like a child who suddenly had their toys put away against their will. I wanted to scream and send everything to hell – specifically Ginny Weasley. But I was an adult and as such I should do what adults do in moments of stress: take a sleeping draught. 

I wish I could say that I slept like a baby, but my state of mind was such that I had nightmares throughout the night. I woke up as if a horde of elephants had given a party in my brain. 

All I could do at breakfast was grunt. Astoria kept looking at me apprehensively. 

“You didn’t sleep well, my dear?” she asked softly.

I grunted an answered. We were alone. The boys were still asleep and Harry hadn’t come down as well. He was certainly awake by now. He was, after all, the Head of the Auror’s Headquarters. I wondered if he even slept at all. Shouldn’t Aurors stay alert 24/7?

“What did you say to Potter?” I asked her. I needed to know, and fast.

Astoria put her cup back on the saucer with her usual delicacy. In all those years together, I had never seen Astoria angry or impatient. It was quite bizarre as a matter of fact. Perhaps it was my fault. I was stressed enough for both of us. 

“I just told him you were under medical treatment and that he shouldn’t bother you much.”

I felt like using a Time-Turner just so I could hear their conversation ‘in loco’. It must have been extremely interesting. I just couldn’t picture Astoria telling Harry to go easy on me.

“Was that all it was?” I insisted.

She nodded. 

“He was quite sympathetic.”

I bet he was. Harry had probably struggled not to laugh. The spoiled-brat Malfoy was a weak adult who could barely make use of magic without collapsing. It was humiliating. 

“Could you keep quiet in the future? I don’t want Harry to find out about every little detail of my life. 

More than he already knew.

“I’m not sure you’ve realised it, but you’ve just called him Harry.”

Her comment sounded casual, but I got the message. I blushed. I got a piece of toast and started spreading butter on it furiously. As if to make the moment more memorable, Harry showed up. Instead of his usual dark Auror robes, he was wearing muggle clothes. His jeans outlined the perfection of his hips and strong legs. The green sweater made his eyes glow brighter. He was wearing glasses, which was quite rare these days. His jet-black hair seemed properly tamed, which was a shame. 

“Good morning,” he said as he sat on the table.

“Good morning,” Astoria answered as the perfect housewife.

I mumbled an answer.

“Someone’s in a bad mood,” stated Harry.

I grumbled.

“Oh, Draco usually wakes up in a terrible mood, but it gets better along the day,” said Astoria with a smile. “Coffee?”

“Oh, yes, thank you.”

I arched my brows. Apparently Astoria didn’t seem to care that I didn’t want her talking to Harry about me. And why the hell did we seem to be living an idyllic domestic scene? Was I living in an alternate universe? It looked like it. A new reality where Astoria and Harry plotted against me like old friends.

I knew what Astoria thought about repressed feelings, but I hoped she wasn’t having any bizarre thoughts like me confessing my love for Harry. As far as anyone was concerned, Harry and Ginny were the perfect couple. 

On the other hand, if things were so perfect in the Potter household as they wanted the world to believe, then what was all that the previous night? Why did Harry tease me so much? Were my meds making me see things that weren’t there? After all these years? Maybe. After all, that was a more likely hypothesis than Harry Potter having feelings for me.

“You’re not eating, Malfoy. The eggs are delicious.”

I looked at Harry as if I was facing a Chimera. 

Astoria just glanced at me, and then at Harry. 

“I’m not hungry,” I replied.

“Well, you’d better start eating or I won’t take you to Egypt.”

Oh, so now I was to be treated like a spoiled brat? I made a face.

“You can’t go to Egypt without me,” I stated.

“As if you could tell me what I can and cannot do, Malfoy,” he threw it at my face.

I got pissed.

“Don’t forget that this is my house, Potter. Just because you’re Head-Chief of the Aurors it doesn’t give you any right to do or say whatever you feel like. You’re not my boss.”

Harry smiled rather evilly. 

“Actually, since we’ll be working together, you’ll have to do as I say, Malfoy. Otherwise, not only will I have to leave you here instead of taking you with me to Egypt, but I’ll also have to arrest you for contempt. Besides, if you’re not well by the day we have to go to Egypt, I will find a way to do everything by myself. So if you want to challenge me and come after me, you’ll need all the strength you can gather, Malfoy. Having said all that, don’t you think you should start eating? We start training this afternoon. I’m going to the Headquarters now, but I’ll be back after lunch.

“Training? What are you talking about?”

“You’re a bit rusty, aren’t you? You need to exercise more. Besides, I’ve promised Alfred to teach him how to control his magic. I think a bit of training will do you both good.”

“How wonderful!” said the woman I thought was my wife. “Just take it easy, will you? Draco also needs to rest.”

“Don’t worry. We’ll be careful. I’ve spoken to Malfoy’s Healer and he told me exactly what we can and cannot do.”

Right. I was definitely living in an alternate reality. All that crazy talk was making me confused.

I noticed Harry staring at me and I got more irritated.

“What?” I growled. 

“I’m not leaving until I see you eat something. And this is an order, Malfoy, just in case you are wondering.”

I hate to confess that his commanding tone impressed me, and much worse, it got me extremely excited. I kept wondering what it would be like to hear that same voice in the privacy of my room. I had to shut my eyes tightly so I could dissipate the image. 

With a sigh, I started eating little by little. First I took a bite of the toast, and then I sipped my tea with milk. I even tried one of Swan’s delicious scones, to Astoria’s delight. Harry didn’t say anything, but I noticed the satisfaction in his eyes. 

I looked away. Seeing them so happy just to see me eat made me feel guilty. I couldn’t begin to imagine the stress I caused my wife. She was so patient. Too patient. I was useless to her and yet she always stood by my side. I couldn’t even think about the idea of divorcing her, not just because of Scorpius, but because I was dependent on her. I was a selfish bastard. I guess that if Astoria asked for her freedom I would let her go. But the funny thing about Astoria was that she never looked unhappy to be by my side. To a man like myself she was the perfect mate. Besides, she had given birth to my precious son. I would be eternally grateful to her. 

“Was it that hard?” Harry asked.

“No, Potter.”

I looked straight at him with challenging eyes. Although I was at a disadvantage, I wasn’t dead.

“Good,” stated Harry, ready to leave. “I’ll see you later, Malfoy. Mrs Malfoy, thank you for everything.”

I wish I could say that I managed to say something witty before Harry could go, but it would be far from the truth. I just let him leave without saying anything.

“Harry Potter is a very interesting man,” said Astoria to make the moment more memorable.

I rolled my eyes.

“Oh, yes, he’s a charming bastard,” I sneered.

“I think having him here will make you good.”

Astoria and I shared a rather meaningful look. Honestly, I couldn’t understand what was going through her head.

“Maybe,” I said. “Or maybe it’s a horrible idea.”

I really didn’t believe that it was. Having Harry around was heaven. It would actually be traumatic if he were to disappear from my life again. 

Things went by normally until lunch. I read the newspapers with their usual articles complaining about the Ministry and the way they had been handling the Death Gang. The group had been split in two according to them, and I could imagine the reason. The Daily Prophet, however, didn’t mention anything at all about The Almighty. 

At the sports page, Ginny Weasley was queen. Damn her and her pertinent comments about Quidditch. I hate to admit it, but she was really good. 

I threw The Daily Prophet aside. My next reading consisted of a letter of three pages of my mother’s babblings. Witches and wizards hardly troubled themselves with owl-posts nowadays. The old school witches and wizards – the conservatives – were pretty much the only ones who made sure to keep up the tradition of using owls. My mother was one of them. She fed me news about France every fifteen days or so. I was relieved to know that she hadn’t heard of anything that’s been going on in England. Miraculously, my parents seemed oblivious about the whole thing.

After lunch, I decided to take a nap. 

I woke up disoriented and with a slight headache. I went for a walk in the garden with my dogs. Angel came along, and he walked by my side in silence. His quietness both pleased me and let me uncomfortable. A child shouldn’t be that well-behaved, but Angel was. He was such a special child. Maybe he was to be the next Harry Potter.

The man himself appeared in front of me when we were back in the house. Thanks to the fresh air and Angel’s company I was able to get rid of my headache.

“Ready for our training section, Malfoy?” Harry asked with a smile. My heart pounded hard in my chest.

He was wearing his detestable Auror uniform. I felt like ripping it off of him. He looked much better in Muggle clothes, even though I hated to admit it.

“I was born ready, Potter,” I retorted.

His smile got wider. 

“You’d better be. I won’t go easy on you.”

Promises, promises. 

I smiled back. My days with Harry were quite promising.


	12. Chapter 12

I take back what I said before. Harry Potter was an asshole. All I had done so far was watch him teach Alfred how to control his powers through his wand instead of wrecking everything around us. Not that it hadn’t been interesting, mind you. Harry was quite a good teacher, patient and yet strict. I still remember a time when he became a Defense against the Dark Art teacher at Hogwarts. I remember how jealous I felt for not being part of the group, which was why I had actually wanted to rat him out to Umbridge in the first place.

I’d heard several times that McGonagall never got tired of inviting him for a position to teach at Hogwarts. I image, however, that no matter how tempting the offer was, Harry would never leave the profession he loved so much.

I tried to get rid of the uncomfortable memories brought back by my days at Hogwarts by focusing on more mudane things, like Harry’s physical attributes. It was difficult not to keep on staring at his strong profile. Harry was wearing typical muggle clothes, jeans and a black jumper.

Harry was not excessively brawny, which pleased me. His body was sculped with perfection thanks to his job. It was a detestable job, indeed. But that job had brought him to my house, and it had shaped his thighs and hips. As much distraught as I was for being ignored, just looking at him was not without its advantages. The way his jeans shaped his buttocks was driving me mad. His eyes were sparkling with glee, obviously for doing something that gave him tremendous pleasure, and this fact delighted me even more. 

Harry was quite a charming man.

‘I hope you’re paying attention, Malfoy. You’re next.’

I blinked. I was next to doing what? It was hard to focus on anything else that wasn’t Harry’s body. His smile seemed to tell me that he knew exactly the cause of my distraction. I felt like bitting his kissable lips.

Harry showed Alfred a few more tricks. The boy pretended not to care, but he was in fact fascinated by Harry Potter, a man he had hated until then. A man who was now lending him a hand and showing him that he be could be trusted. The man I loved. 

‘I’m waiting, Malfoy.’

I failed to notice that Alfred was now sitting next to Angel, both of them staring at me curiously. I felt my face heating up. I stood up slowly and stopped in front of Harry. Then I took my wand out of my pocket. I felt as if I had been struck by lightning. My whole body was perked up. 

Harry just looked at me, which made me kind of edgy. I frowned.

‘What?’ I asked.

‘Don’t you have more comfortable clothes? Or do you always dress up as if you are going to be invited to a ball at any minute, Your Highness? You’ve always thought of yourself as a prince, haven’t you?’

I glanced at my light grey robe. The fabric suited me just fine. I learnt from a very tender age that I should always be elegantly dressed. Harry was wrong. I didn’t think I was a prince. I was one.

‘Does it make any difference?’ I shrugged. ‘Witches and wizards have been duelling with much heavy clothes than these for centuries. This robe happens to be designed by one of the best designers in Paris.

‘I couldn’t care less. Go put on some jeans and a t-shirt.’

I puffed. It wasn’t the first time he presumed he could give me orders.

‘What if I don’t want to change clothes, Potter?’

He smiled in the most delivish way.

‘No problem. I can solve this by a flick of my wand. But I have to warn you. You might end up naked.’

I couldn’t waste that opportunity to give him one of my Malfoy smiles as I teased him, ‘Why don’t you just come out and say you want to see me naked?’

‘And why would I want to see a scrawny person such as you naked?’

‘So any body-builder would do?’

Harry made a face, knowing fully well he had just made a fool of himself in his attempt to offend me. I noticed that his cheeks went red, and I was overjoyed. 

‘Hey, would you two stop that? This talk is giving me the creeps…’ said Alfred staring at us with a strange look on his face.

It was like a reality check. I felt as bashful as Harry. I had completely forgotten about the boys’ presence. In the end I decided to follow Harry’s orders, mostly out of curiosity. I just wanted to know what he had in store for me.

I picked up some jeans I had bought in one of the most expensive muggle stores in London, and an Armani cashmere sweater. Though I continued to look sick, at least I was well-dressed. I had to keep my Malfoy dignity intact.

Harry wasn’t so quick to hide his approval, and, who knew, attraction. Maybe I was just dreaming. But with all those looks exchanged and talks full of double entendre, how could I not hope that maybe, just maybe, Harry was a bit interested in me?

Illusions… I was so desperate for something I was starting to imagine things.

‘I’m all yours,’ I said, and I swear I had no hidden intentions as I said it.

‘Really?’ Harry asked with a smile that took my breath away.

He was definitely flirting. It made me wonder if I should continue to play the game and see how far things could go, but Angel and Alfred were there. The little one seemed not to notice what was happening. Alfred, however, was in a dangerous age. It was better to be careful. 

Harry seemed to realise that as well, because next thing I knew he went back to his stern Auror Potter mode. 

We started with a few basic spells, and I felt as if I was back in my first year at Hogwarts. It was difficult to be with Harry like that and not remember those days. It was also quite impossible not to be swept away by a zillion of different emotions. It all came back to me: Harry and I in the Forbidden Forest, Harry and I duelling, Harry speaking Parseltongue. All our juvenile fights. The pain in his eyes when he went after Snape to get revenge on Dumbledore’s behalf. My despair when I saw him a prisoner at Malfoy Manor. The humiliation for losing my wand. His hand holding mine and saving me from certain death.

I felt sick and I had to stop. Harry came to me immediately.

‘Are you alright, Malfoy?’ 

‘I’m fine, Potter. Let’s keep going.’ I opened my eyes and pretend a confidence I didn’t possess.

I would not fall apart in front of him. I had to show Harry I had gotten better, even if it wasn’t true. 

‘I think it’s best if we stop for today,’ he said with suspicion, putting away his wand.

‘We haven’t finished here yet,’ I retorted, pointing my wand at him. ‘Besides, this was your idea, wasn’t it?’

‘I’ve promised your wife we would take it easy.’

‘We’ve barely begun, Potter!’

‘You can barely stand, Malfoy!’

‘Nonsense! I feel great!’

As if to prove otherwise, my vision went blurred and I felt myself falling. To my utter humiliation, Harry was the one to hold me in his arms. He caught me as if I was made of paper. I mumbled something not so polite, when in fact what I really wanted was to lean my head on his shoulder and rest.

‘What happened? Is he going to be alright?’ I heard Alfred asking.

Angel was beside him, clutching on his clothes.

‘I’m…’ I tried to speak, but Harry cut me off abruptly.

‘He’s being a stubborn prick, but he’ll be alright.’

‘Potter…’ What should have sounded like a threat sounded more like a whine. 

‘What? Are you going to tell me we should continue even though you can barely stand? Stop being so headstrong! Dammit, Malfoy! I’m really going mad if I’m still hoping to take you with me to Egypt when you are so weak!’

I smiled feebly. 

‘Ah, but this is perfect, Potter. I’m the sacrifice. Or haven’t you realised it yet? All you have to do is let me bleed to get the book. You don’t need me healthy, just alive.’

‘If I wanted you dead I would have left you in the Room of Requirement. And stop being a smartass. Just shut up.’

He really was pissed off. Was he really concerned about my welfare, or he was simply angry because he had to carry me to my room? Come to think of it, the almighty Potter could have just cast a spell instead of carrying me in his arms like a medieval knight.

My heart summersaulted. 

The gentle way he laid me down in bed moved me. His eyes, on the other hand, were still harsh and almost made me flinch. 

I felt Angel’s little hands squeezing mine and I forgot about Harry for a second. His green eyes were looking at me with adoration but also apprehension. He was really worried. I felt guilty. How could a child who not so long ago was a complete stranger to me, gets worried about me?

Harry stroked his brown hair. 

‘You don’t have to worry about the idiot. He only needs some rest,’ Harry stated. 

‘Hey!’ I complained.

‘Don’t you think it’s stupid to worry your kids like this?’ he questioned me.

My kids. That fact suddenly dawned on me. They were my kids now. The adoption papers had yet to be released, but the process had already started.

Looking at Alfred, I noticed that he was as shaken as I, as if only now he was also realising that he was my son.

‘If you’re really going to be our father, you should get well soon,’ he mumbled. ‘I don’t like the idea of having a useless father…’

And after saying that, he took Angel’s hand and left. 

Harry grinned as I frowned at the brat’s cheekiness.

‘D’you think this is funny?’ I asked, irritated.

‘You don’t? Alfred already likes you, Merlin knows why.’

Perhaps. Not that it really mattered. I made a face. Who was I kidding? The kids already had a special place in my heart. 

After some time, Harry said, ‘I’m serious, Malfoy. I don’t see how you can come to Egypt with me. The idea seems really absurd now, more than before.’

‘I’m going to get better, Potter.’

‘We only cast basic spells, Malfoy, and look at you!’

I was starting to believe in my therapist, that is to say, that my condition had everything to do with my past. I had only collapsed after those unpleasant memories had washed over me. Harry was a big part of the problem, but not the only one. I was a haunted man. 

I sighed.

To my utter disbelief, I felt a stroke on my left hand. My heart went mad in my chest. My breath quickened. I wondered as I looked into Harry’s eyes what that touch in my hand meant. 

The teenager Harry Potter had been so easy to read, perhaps because of the purity in his heart. His feelings had always been right there for anyone to see them. The adult Harry Potter, however, was more complicated. He had lived too much, seen and felt too many things to remain the same. His green eyes were still warm, but they were not inviting. It wasn’t easy to know what was on his mind. It was such a pity. I missed the old Harry Potter.

‘You’d better get well,’ he muttered.

My heart melted.

‘Harry…’

The fact that I used his first name didn’t go unnoticed. I could see how confused and even surprised he was. The hand that touched mine disappeared. It was as if only then he had realised what he was doing. We tensed. But before I could say something, Astoria appeared.

‘Draco, honey, are you ok? I’ve heard Alfred saying that…’

She got quiet when she saw Harry by the bed. I didn’t know whether I felt relieved or annoyed by her interruption. 

‘I’m ok, Astoria,’ I said, tired of repeating myself.

‘It was my fault. I promised to go slowly, but I guess I overdid it…’ Harry apologised.

I rolled my eyes.

‘Nonsense. You didn’t overdo it, Potter. In fact, if we had continued …’

‘… You’d have passed out in the garden?’ he suggested with false sweetness.

It was probably true, but I didn’t pass out that easily. Well, maybe just once or twice a week. I made a face.

‘Well, since everyone agrees that I need some rest, could you please leave me alone?’

I didn’t really want to get rid of Harry. My heart, however, needed a break. I thought that having Harry around would be good for me. It was, in a way. But it also had its downside.  
He just nodded and left without saying a word. I thought it was strange, but I was in no condition to go after him. I had no strength left. 

‘You overdid it, didn’t you?’ Astoria asked me with a reproachful look.

‘No. Potter is the one overreacting.’

Astoria sighed heavily.

‘I thought it would be a good idea to have him around, but now I’m not so sure…’

I caught her hand. It was as cold as mine. We were not used to exchanging caresses, but I missed some human touch sometimes. Not having Scorpius around was killing me. I used to hug him all the time. I wondered if he missed us as well. The answer was probably yes, but with his busy life at Hogwarts, he most certainly had no time to spend missing his parents. I thought about writing him. I wouldn’t mention Albus Severus. When Scorpius was ready, I was sure he would tell me about him. 

I closed my eyes. I hated to admit it, but I was really exhausted. As soon as Astoria left, I fell asleep.I woke up hours later and took a shower. When I came down for dinner, I was actually hungry. Angel smiled when he saw me. Alfred just glanced at me and pretended not to care. I knew he did, though.

Harry didn’t dine with us. He had left the Manor hours before without saying where he was going.

I missed him. As I looked at Astoria and the kids, I truly wish I was in love with her. It would be great if we could live a real marriage. If only Harry Potter hadn’t claimed ownership of my heart.

Later on, as I played the piano with Angel, I let Harry invade my mind again. It was thanks to him that the melody sounded so heartbreaking. Ten years ago I had started composing songs as a way to deal with my feelings. It had worked for a while, until thoughts of Harry began to crawl on my mind and ruin everything. 

There was a song for him, of course. A sad and unfinished melody. My fingers ran along the piano keys as if searching for it. The beginning was happy and pulsing and it lifted my spirits. But the drama soon started. It wasn’t a good idea, but it could not be helped. I got feverish. I felt the sweat on my body. My soul got shattered into tiny little pieces. Then the last note came, the sudden ending, and the silence. I stopped. There was no ending. There would never be one. I shivered. 

Angel looked at me as if he understood. It was impossible, though, wasn’t it, that a child his age knew what I was feeling. Indeed, Angel was not an ordinary child. 

There was an understanding between us. I smiled at him so as not to worry him. I’m not sure it worked. He was still quite serious. I caressed his hair and he finally relaxed. I felt like squeezing him in my arms like I used to do with Scorpius. 

The clock struck at ten. Angel was supposed to be in bed already. I found it strange that Astoria hadn’t showed up to take him to his room. 

‘Well, I guess it’s past your bedtime, mister.’

I stood up and Angel did the same. When I turned around, I saw Harry. He looked absolutely exhausted. His green eyes, however, were shining brightly. There was admiration in those eyes, and something more. Something that seemed to mirror what I was feeling. Sadness mixed with resignation. The desire for things to be different. Or maybe it was only my mind playing tricks on me.

I couldn’t say anything, but at least I wasn’t the only one who seemed to have lost my tongue. Harry appeared to be as lost as I was.

Angel squeezed my hand and pulled me slightly.

‘Is everything ok?’ he asked.

I nodded and smiled. Things were not fine, but Angel didn’t need to know that. He was extremely sensitive.

Alfred appeared behind Harry and he frowned when he saw his brother. ‘There you are! Mrs Malfoy is looking for you. It’s past your bedtime.’

So this time Astoria had sent Alfred to interrupt us. I wanted to give a big laugh. What was Astoria thinking? I should probably have a talk with her, but I lacked the courage to do so.

‘But I’m not sleepy,’ Angel protested.

Alfred rolled his eyes as he caught his brother’s hand. As he led him out of the room, I heard him say, ‘I’ll tell you a story.’

‘About duels?’ the green eyes shone brightly.

I lifted an eyebrow. Since when did the little one like to hear about duels?

‘Yes, it’s about duels. The best of them all! Merlin against the Order of the Phoenix!’

It was Harry’s time to lift an eyebrow. I laughed. Harry glared at me and I tried to get serious.

‘Goodnight,’ Angel exclaimed before leaving.

‘Goodnight,’ Harry and I answered at the same time.

Silence filled the room as the boys left. Harry came towards me like a panther. I was frozen on the spot. Unfortunately, I was not what he was aiming for but the piano behind me.  
He stopped in front of the instrument and delicately pressed some of its keys. I came a little closer.

‘It always surprises me when I hear you playing,’ he said almost in a whisper.

My heart beat faster.

‘Why? Because then you have to see me as a human being?’ I retorted.

Our eyes met. Harry seemed terribly serious.

‘Maybe.’

‘And that’s certainly worse than death,’ I smirked.

‘I wouldn’t go that far,’ Harry smirked back. ‘How are you?’

‘Much better. That was really nothing.’

‘You know, no one tells me anything certain about your disease, which drives me crazy.’ Harry’s fingers on the keys hardened. The sound made me cringe. ‘What exactly do you have?’

His green eyes looked dangerous as he stared at me. I took a step forward without even realising. It was now or never. Harry didn’t even blink. He just kept staring, challenging me to come closer.

‘I thought you didn’t care.’

‘Are we having this conversation again?’ he asked crossing his arms.

‘No, dammit. You are the one who drives me crazy! Because when you start talking like this, I start thinking that you care!’ I answered, irritated as hell. 

‘Does it really matter whether I care or not?’

Of course it did! The question, however, was a tricky one. What did he want to hear?

‘Why do you care about what I care?’ he insisted.

‘And why do you care?’

That conversation was giving me a headache.

Harry sighed.

‘Alright. We both care. The reasons why are not important at the moment.’

I frowned. ‘They aren’t?’

‘No. What I want to know is what you have. Hermione told me some wizards can lose their magic with the passing of the time, but those are rare cases. And none of them felt as sick as you.’

I already knew about that. After all, I’ve been living with my condition for more than ten years.

‘Do you think I’m going to die?’

‘I don’t know what to think. Are you?’

He might not realise it, but he was concerned. I wasn’t dreaming this time. I could see it in his eyes and hear it in the tone of his voice. Harry wasn’t that good of an actor, and he could not have changed completely over time. The old Harry was still there, maybe more composed, but still human and sweet. I dared to hope. Maybe…

I got closer. Our breaths mingled. 

‘Don’t you dare ask me why I care again,’ he hissed.

Harry’s defenses were all up. Interesting. If I got any closer, our bodies would touch, and so would our lips. This was the moment Astoria was supposed to come and interrupt us before things got out of hand. I waited a few seconds. She didn’t appear.

‘Everyone dies one day. But my time is not up yet,’ I muttered. ‘I don’t know what I have. Nobody really does. Some think it’s purely psychological. It’s not contagious, that’s for sure. And even though it makes me sick, it also doesn’t seem fatal. But maybe... maybe in the future I might come to lose all of my magic.’

‘Why?’

There was despair in his voice. I smiled feebly and shrugged as if that did not affect me.

‘Who knows? Divine justice, maybe? What matters is that I am well enough to go to Egypt with you,’ I stated.

‘You’re not, and that’s the problem!’

He caught me by my arms and pulled me. Our bodies touched. Our lips were so close that breathing was difficult.

‘I’m considering just taking a vial with a sample of your blood with me and see how that goes.’

It was an idea, and not a bad one. But I would never let Harry embark on that trip without me.

‘You’re not going alone, Potter! If you want my blood, you’ll have to duel for it!’

‘Like that is a great challenge, Malfoy,’ he mocked. ‘Don’t forget that you were the one who almost dropped dead the few times we dueled. If we could call that dueling.’

I clutched my fists.

‘Why do you want to go so much?’ he insisted.

I froze. I couldn’t tell him the truth. I couldn’t tell him that I just wanted to be next to him, that knowing that he needed me gave me strength to wake up every morning with a new purpose. He wouldn’t believe me anyway, and chances were he would send me straight to St. Mungus. I had to lie.

‘I’m interested because of Angel’s well-being.’ This was true. ‘But I’m also interested because technically, the book belongs to the Malfoys. And I want what’s mine by right.’

The contempt in Harry’s eyes was immediate. I hated myself for making him feel that way about me, but there was nothing I could do. It was tragically funny that Harry believed my lie but not the fact that I loved him. Life really sucked. 

He let go of me as if I was a disgusting thing, and he took several steps back.

‘That’s it then?’ he groaned. ‘You just want the book like all those bastards in the Almighty Group? After telling me over and over that you are different from them?’  
‘No! I don’t want to use the book to bring Slytherin back!’

‘And why do you want the book exactly? To put it in a shelf and show it off to your stuckup friends and brag about the fact that if you want you can bring anyone back from the dead?’

‘Don’t be so melodramatic!’

‘How can I not be, Malfoy? I don’t even know why I bother anymore and why I worry so much about you.’

My heart stopped. Had I spoiled everything? Should I risk it, even though…? Even though what? Our relationship was already complicated, and I had just made it all worse.

‘You don’t get it,’ I replied.

‘I think I do, and more than I wish to. Somehow I still hoped you had really changed. But it’s all a game to you, isn’t? Your sudden interest in Angel, your wish to please me…’

‘You don’t know anything at all!’ I exclaimed. 

‘I know that you are the same bastard as you’ve always been.’

It hurt more than I thought it would. I felt my heart shrink. I didn’t want Harry looking at me with such hatred. Not anymore. I was so tired of that stupid game. 

‘If I told you the truth, you wouldn’t believe me, Potter.’

‘What truth?’

‘This!’

Without thinking about what I was doing or even the consequences of such an irresponsible act, I pulled him closer and kissed him. It was not a romantic scene, and our kiss was far from delicate.

It was rude, clumsy, mad. I wanted to taste more than just his lips. I wanted to prove to him that I wasn’t there because of the glory, or the damn book. I was there for him.   
Though the moment seemed to last a lifetime, it actually didn’t last more than a few seconds.

By this point I couldn’t think about anything at all. My eyes could not move away from his. I tried desperately to read his feelings. He was angry, surprised and confused. He was quite disturbed. 

I felt the room shrink around me ready to smash me.

‘What does that mean?’ he finally asked.

‘What do you think?’ I dared to reply.

‘Don’t do this, Malfoy,’ he warned me.

‘Don’t do what?’

‘Don’t tempt me.’

And what exactly did he mean by that? Don’t tempt me or I’ll kiss you back? Don’t tempt me or I’ll stupefy you? I licked my lips.

‘What if I said…’ I took a deep breath. I needed more than just courage to what I was about to say. ‘What if all I’ve ever wanted was…’

‘Sleep with me?’

My eyes opened widely. That was the last thing I was expecting to hear from him. 

‘Is that it? Are you attracted to me? Are you gay?’ he pressed on.

I bit my lip and clutched my fists.

‘No! I’m not gay. I’m not attracted to men,’ I denied.

‘Right,’ he smirked.

‘It’s true! You just don’t get it! It’s not… I’m not…’

‘Find someone else to play with, Malfoy. I’m not in the mood for this game.’

‘Bloody hell, Potter! You really don’t understand, do you?’

‘Make me understand!’

He crossed his arms as if to wait for my answer. I guess that was a good sign. He was angry, but he had neither punched nor threatened to take me to St Mungus.

‘I want you! Just you,’ I finally said.

His green eyes darkened. Harry had never looked so threatening or sexy. And neither so lost. He opened his mouth, but seemed to think better of it and closed it again. He tried one more time. Nothing came out of it. Finally, he turned around and left. As soon as he was out of sight, I sat down on the cold floor and put my hands on my face as if that would be enough to hide me from the world. I was more than worn out now. 

What have I done? Could I take it back? Could I cast a memory charm on him, make him forget about the whole thing? As if I could ever cast a spell on Harry. I laughed bitterly, and then I let out a cry. 

All was lost. What would happen from now on was a complete mystery.


	13. Chapter 13

It was quite clear to me that that night would be the longest of my life. I’m not sure why I didn’t just take a Sleeping Draught. I was too troubled. I kept walking round in my room reliving the kiss I’d forced upon Harry. It was pure agony. I wonder what he was thinking and if he had left. I didn’t have the heart to check. Perhaps I could send a house-elf to spy on him. The cruel truth, however, was that I was afraid to know. 

I tried to hear any noises coming from next door. There were no sounds at all. It was as if Harry was not there anymore. I had no idea where Harry had gone after leaving me. 

I began pacing nervously round again. Soon there would be a hole on the floor. 

What if I confessed my sin to Astoria? What if I asked her advice? 

It was madness. What was I even thinking? I owed her all my respect. Even if Astoria knew about Harry, I should never have kissed him. Not there. Not ever. 

I tousled my hair and sighed out loud. I would soon begin to hyperventilate. I fell on the bed on my back and closed my eyes. I would not give in. Not tonight. I would be strong. I had to be. I would still have to face Harry again. I would have make up a really good excuse for that kiss and for the fact that I…

I sat up at once. I had confessed what I wanted to Harry. Out loud. How was I still alive? Why hadn’t the world stopped spinning? 

A noise at the door made me jumpy. Someone was trying to get in. I saw the flash of a spell being used. My legs were shaking. I ran to get my wand beside my bed and cast a Stupefy spell towards whoever it was. The counter spell was powerful and effective. I kept my wand at ready but only for a few minutes. From the open door, Harry was glaring at me. I gulped. I felt I was walking on a tightrope. He walked towards me and the door shut behind him without him touching it or even muttering a spell. 

I went still as a statue. My wand slipped from my hand. Coward. Just because he was its true master and not me. Treacherous wand. 

Harry came closer and I could see his eyes were stormy and the pupils dilated. The green of his eyes were incredibly dark. My lips opened up. What was I expecting exactly? I should run, go far away. But I just stood there, waiting…

Nothing was said. I wanted to verbalise whatever I was feeling but it was impossible. My vocal chords were paralysed. My unevenly breath mixed with his. Green eyes glanced at my mouth for a second and then at my eyes. 

His hands wrapped round my head and pulled me forward. I thought I was about to be strangled, but I was mistaken. And from that moment on, the world stopped making any sense; or perhaps it had just found its meaning. The hot mouth caught mine in a breathtaking kiss. I just surrendered. What else could I do? I let Harry pin me on the wall. His hands caressed my face and then my body. His eager tongue entangled in mine. I saw stars, constellations, paradise. I went mushy. I fought against my panic, against that part of me that wanted to run away, against the fact that my body was turning to jelly. 

I wanted to touch him so badly, but my mouth was having a hard time keeping up with Harry’s hunger for mine. His hands ripped off my robe and I saw myself almost naked. I felt cold despite the lit up fireplace. I was sure, though, that my body was trembling for other reasons. My nipples got hard. I moaned when I felt Harry’s hands caressing them. The pleasure drew a path of fire on my skin and got between my thighs. I felt like a teenager being touched for the first time. If he continued I would soon cum. And by Merlin, how I wish he continued for eternity. 

Harry’s lips licked and bit my neck. I threw my head back in ecstasy. I held him and buried my hands in his luscious black mane, something I had always dreamt of doing. I pulled him as closer as I could, my hips moving desperately. I noticed that Harry was as excited as I was, and I smiled victoriously. Harry groaned and kissed me until I was out of breath. Our hips moved in unison. I wanted him naked, but there was no way of stopping now, not when I was almost bursting. I bit Harry's lower lip hard and came in his arms. Harry followed me closely in a strangled moan as if he were in pain. I held on to him as if I was a castaway, my own primitive groan escaping from my lips. 

I refused to let him go when we were done. I just locked him in my arms and leaned my head on his large shoulder. His panting breath matched my own, and so did the fast beating of his heart. 

“Malfoy… I need to breathe,” he muffled, his hand closing on mine to move me away from his body. 

Ok, perhaps I was holding him too tightly, but what was I supposed to do? I didn’t want him to just disappear on me. Not now.

We glanced at one another. Harry’s hands held mine like claws. I frowned as I waited for his next move. I was obviously afraid. I had no idea what to expect from that Harry Potter. Perhaps he would simply dispose of the proof of the crime by casting a memory spell on me. As if I would let him erase what had just took place between us from my mind. There was no way in hell I would let it happen. I would die fighting if I had to. 

He lifted one of his strong hands. I shut my eyes thinking I would be punched, but I was quite surprised by the soft stroke on my cheek. I blinked, amazed. Though his green eyes were still harsh, the rest of him seemed tender. His hands did not squeeze me anymore. They just traced my hands, my nose, my cheeks, my lips and my jawline and went down my neck making me melt. 

As if dealing with a wild animal, I brushed my lips with his until we kissed. I savoured them for a moment, but he remained unresponsive. Soon, however, his defences began to crumble and he was kissing me back. It was soft and sweet, just a brushing of lips, but just as pleasing as if it had been a full make out session. I could hear music on the background like a string of violins. I moaned as the kiss deepened. Our tongues performed a perfect dance. 

I took the courage to unbutton his shirt. He didn’t stop me, which I considered a sign to go on. His shirt slid to the floor. I let my hands take a path of fire on his strong chest. Harry took a deep breath as his eyes fluttered shut.

I had no idea what I was doing. I had never slept with another man. In fact, I didn’t desire other men, just Harry. Always Harry. Even being inexperienced, I knew I wanted to touch all of him. I wanted to taste him, smell him, and merge our souls. I acted by pure instinct. Soon my mouth took the same path as my hands. As a gift, Harry groaned and trembled in my arms. The hands on my hair were not there to stop me but to encourage me to continue. I unbuttoned his jeans revealing muscular tights. Shoes flew away with his jeans and socks. All that was left was his white boxers stained by his early orgasm. His thick shaft was already waiting for me, so I finally took away the last garment in the way. 

It wasn’t something I had actually thought about doing, but now that I was there on my knees and having that vision in front of me just waiting for the taking, I did not hesitate to do just that. I touched his stiff member with my tongue and hands. I felt it throb. I grinned with satisfaction and pleasure. I tried swallowing it all and heard Harry moaned something I did not understand because I was too busy at the moment. It was quite an experience to feel his prick grow inside my mouth. I knew Harry was in as much ecstasy as I was, almost coming again.

I knew he was close, so I moved my mouth faster. I wanted to taste his cum. He grunted and pulled me up. I was about to complain when he pushed me on the bed, his body on mine. Harry undressed me with his seeker’s agility and dexterity. I was the one completely naked now, and the sight wasn’t pretty. Comparing my body to his was so pathetic that my first instinct was to cover myself.

What I saw in Harry’s eyes, however, was not revulsion. They took all of me as his hand followed his look. He seemed to want to keep every piece of me imprinted on his mind. I felt tears in my eyes, but I was quick to hold them in. It would be too bloody ridiculous to cry in front of him. I was no virgin. Well, coming to think of it, perhaps I was.   
“You really need to gain some weight,” commented him rudely, and before I could protest he went on, “You seem so fragile… so delicate… your skin is so soft.”

He kissed my bellybutton and I melted. He didn’t suck me off, but his hand was more than enough to drive me insane. He touched me so tenderly I wanted to scream for him to stop being such a gentleman. 

I pulled my legs apart as wide as I could so he could get settled between them. My body was on fire as his rubbed against mine. Our mouths collided. My fingers clawed his perfect buttocks, which made Harry kiss me even harder. His weight against my body seemed to crush me in a delicious way, as if we would merge into one at any second. I knew where that would lead us and I was scared. My biggest fear in that particular moment, on the other hand, was that he would stop what he was doing. I would not bear that. 

I heard Harry’s husky voice whisper something as his fingers poked my entrance, thrusting cold wet-like fingers inside. I shivered from the suddenness of it and the pain that soon passed as he muttered something else. He was wearing a condom. How practical of him. I smiled, but my grin faded as his cock breached my hole. It was like being ripped apart. I grunted loudly. My heart went mad in my chest. My whole body trembled. Harry held me tightly and kissed me so tenderly that I moaned, but this time more from pleasure than pain. As he began to move, carefully at first and then fast, I felt my whole self being pulled towards him. 

“Harry... Harry...,” I sobbed over and over. 

I didn’t exactly mean to but ended up scratching his back and arms several times as I tried to bring him closer. He didn’t seem to mind, though, his movements becoming faster and more desperate as time went by. His moans matched mine as well. I felt my eyes teary. What the bloody hell. Tears, Draco? Really? Whatever. It was just better to let it all go, enjoy the moment to the fullest. The more the fire built up, the more I let myself go. And when I came it was in scorching ecstasy as I had never felt before. I think I stopped breathing for an instant, completely absorbed in Harry. He followed me closely with a strangled moan. It was a beautiful thing to see his face fully taken by desire. So I kissed him.  
I am happy to say I did not suddenly burst out my love for him, even though it was at the tip of my tongue.

He took some time to get off of me, and I couldn’t care less. The heat of his body made wonders to my broken spirit. When he was finally gone, I felt the chilly night all over. I shivered. Harry just lay down by my side and covered us gently. I was speechless, and rightly so. Even if I had something to say, chances were high that I would spoil everything. It was much better to be quiet. 

“Are you alright?” he asked. 

I bit the inside of my cheek to prevent one of my typical Malfoy comments to spoil the mood. It was not the time. I had Harry right there beside me in bed. What more could I want apart from letting my cynical side asleep for a while? Therefore, I just nodded. 

“You are so quiet I am starting to be afraid,” was the next typical Potter comment.

I frowned. Alright. He was right, wasn’t he? Harry smirked. 

“Why don’t you just come out and say what you’re thinking? Your face is going all red, and I know it is from anger,” he continued. 

I made a face. “Come out, Potter? Really?” 

“Oh, he talks!” 

He laughed and it was the most beautiful sound I had ever heard in my life. I felt like sticking out my tongue at him, but in a cute kind of way which would just be ridiculous and childish. 

“Just… don’t spoil things, Potter.”

He looked at me as if trying to read my very core. I felt like a guinea pig. I was definitely blushing now, and it was not from anger. Talking would be the recipe for disaster, wouldn’t it? I couldn’t hold it any longer, though, not with those green eyes staring at me for so long.

“What?” I asked.

“I should get back to my room.”

“I guess you should.”

“But…”

Merlin, he was such a bastard. Why did I have to say it all? Why couldn’t he just state what he had to say about what had just happened between us? It was his entire fault after all. He had barged into my room and attacked me like a wild animal. Why couldn’t he just tell me he wanted to be here with me? 

“There is no but,” I lied.

I was an idiot. My pride was much stronger than everything else. 

Harry smiled and I saw two dimples on his cheeks. It was so adorable I almost sighed like an infatuated teenager. 

“Of course there is, and a big one,” he said, closing his eyes. “Do you want me to leave?”

“Why have you come in the first place?”

He opened his eyes and frowned. “Isn’t it obvious?”

“You want me.”

It was a fact that had just dawned on me. My heart was summersaulting. 

“Like I said, it’s obvious, Malfoy.”

I shut up, but not because I didn’t want to ask any more questions. I had so many questions and then some more. The main one was about his wife. In my mind, and I was guessing to the whole of the wizarding world, they were perfect for each other. They were the portrait of true love. What had gone wrong to lead him to my bed, and why? With so many questions in my head, I just decided to stay quiet. To hell with it all. I had Harry Potter right there, in bed with me. It was better to think about the consequences later.   
I felt his fingertips caressing my lips and I opened them ready for rendition. 

“You are quiet again,” he pointed out. 

“Would you rather I talked or did this?”

In a daring move to a frozen man like me, I embraced and kissed him. Our bodies were still sweaty and I was in heaven. Harry’s mouth accepted mine in his willingly and entirely. His hands were all over me, rubbing me against him. Our kiss deepened and I was rewarded with a sweet battle of tongues. 

I felt so alive. My body was on fire again. It was unbelievable. I wanted him again, and again, and again. I didn’t even realise when exactly I got on top of him and began moving slowly and then swiftly. I wasn’t the only one enjoying the ride. Harry was as keen as I to start our love dance again. I smiled.

“Sexy bastard,” he whispered, biting my lip as he saw my wicked grin.

I was certain our lips would be terribly swollen in the morning, but who cared. Being called a sexy bastard by Harry Potter made me extra excited.

“We should stop…” he muttered as my hand joined our pricks. 

“No way,” I muttered back. I felt like adding a ‘not in a million years’ to the sentence. 

“But…”

I shut him up with a dazzling kiss. 

“No ‘buts’, Potter. Not tonight. Well, maybe different kinds of butts,” I sneered.

“This is madness,” he said, but I could tell he thought my comment had been funny. 

“And you’ve just realised that?”

He flipped us over so he would be on the top. Once the alpha, always the alpha. 

“No. I realised that a long time ago…” 

He ran his mouth against my stomach. It became more and more difficult to speak coherently with him torturing me with his tongue. His mouth finally landed on my hard cock and I might have whimpered. I didn’t expect Harry to suck me. I also didn’t expect him to be the most skilful of men in that department, which he wasn’t to my relief. Being good at giving head would mean he had experienced it with other men, and I was selfish and jealous. I wanted to be the only man in Harry’s life. Though he wasn’t experienced, his enthusiasm and care were more than enough to having me dizzy and pleading for more.

“I want you so badly,” I let out. 

Harry stopped what he was doing, which almost killed me. He touched his forehead with mine and whispered against my lips, “What do you want?”

“I want you inside me,” I confessed with a voice that definitely wasn’t mine. 

He closed his eyes as if in agony. 

“I don’t think it’s a good idea…”

Of course it was. He couldn’t be rejecting me now of all times. We had come so far. That wasn’t what Harry meant, however. He was just worried about me and my health. I noticed that in his eyes. 

“Idiot. I’m fine,” I assured him. I led his hand to my pulsing prick. “Do you think I would be this excited if I wasn’t ok? Magic makes me tired, Potter, not sex.” 

Not that I really knew whether sex was good or bad for my health, but it wasn’t the time to think of such useless things. I couldn’t care less about my health problems. All I wanted was Harry again. 

“It’s so cute to see you worry about me like this,” I teased.

That did it. His reaction was immediate and so was the penetration. I felt some pain, I cannot deny it. But I was instantly taken by the intense pleasure of having Harry Potter filling me in. His green eyes shone like precious gemstones. His body was stiff from the effort of keeping control of the situation, but it was too late for that now. Both of us were lost and delirious. No amount of rationality or reality could have torn us apart, not then. His cock touched a rather sensitive spot inside of me and I cried involuntarily. Pleasure overtook any fear I could still have. I held on to him, scratched him, and made him mine. I discovered many different types of moans that night at each thrust. I clenched my ass around his shaft in sweet revenge, forcing a primitive groan as ancient as time itself from his throat. 

Finding I had a new power over him, I made him reach the zenith quickly. I followed him the moment his orgasm filled me whole. For a brief moment I went rigid, just to have my body relax in ecstasy the next. 

By this point I was exhausted. Even though I wanted to be able to go on, to ask for more because I did want more, I was too sleepy. My eyes fluttered and my breathing became sound and relaxed. 

“Malfoy?”

I had no strength to answer this time around. I was quickly being embraced my Morpheus.

“Draco...” Harry tried once more with a hint of worry in his voice. 

I smiled so he knew I was ok. I was more than ok really. I was in cloud 9. What I needed was rest. 

“Idiot…” he whispered in my ear and kissed me on the forehead. 

It was so sweet and I wish I could have had enough strength to return the gesture.

When I finally woke up, I felt as if I had been in a Quidditch accident. My whole body hurt. I felt pain in muscles I didn’t even know existed. Moving was agony, but opening my eyes was easy. I blinked a few times. The sun was trying to make its way through a curtain gap. I looked at the clock at the bedside table. It was half past eight. As expected, Harry was not in bed anymore or anywhere in the room. He was probably far away from the Mansion as well. I put a hand where his body had laid all night. It was dead cold. He had probably escaped the moment I had fallen asleep. It wasn’t unexpected but a pity all the same. 

My heart was split between the fear of what was to come and the overwhelming happiness of having my dream fulfilled. Part of me wanted to start singing and dancing. The other part, however, just wanted to stay in bed under the covers and never leave. 

Nonetheless, life went on. 

I slowly made my way to the bathroom, wincing here and there. When I glanced at myself in the mirror I was taken aback. There were red marks everywhere. Bites and kisses left by Harry tattooed many parts of my body. I grinned kinkily. I was glad they were there, proof of our sex night, an incredible night, magical, one I would never forget.

What I would do from that moment on was a complete mystery. I was sure of one thing, though. Staying away from Harry would be tremendous pain. My body was already screaming to have him back. My prick was showing signs of life just by thinking of him. Not even the water shower was enough to put out my fire. At least I was feeling more relaxed. 

I thought it strange that Astoria had let me sleep. After the strange smile she gave me at breakfast, I was even surer she knew more about Harry and me than I suspected.

“Good morning, darling. I hope you’d slept well. It is not like you to sleep until late, and for a moment I was quite worried. But Harry Potter was a sweetheart and told me you were perfectly fine and that I should just let you rest.”

The coffee I was pouring got spilled all over the table. Astoria was quick to call a house-elf to clean up the mess. When the little creature finally left us, I looked at my wife as if I was seeing her for the first time.

“Potter asked you to let me… rest?”

“Indeed. He told me you had a rough night. He didn’t get into details, though.” 

Thank Merlin for that.

“Are you alright, darling? You do look so tired.”

I rolled my eyes and poured coffee in my cup again, this time without being clumsy.

“I am fine.”

If Astoria had any idea about what had happened the night before between Harry and me she didn’t say. She just smiled as usual. I felt the worst of men. We didn’t love each other passionately, but that didn’t mean I could just sleep with someone else without telling her first. We were married and had a son together. Our rooms were in different wings of the castle, granted, but only because the wing I was in was warmer and Astoria would much rather had the room with the view to the lake.

“Is Potter here?” I asked.

Astoria shook her head. “No. He left very early. He said he had things to do at work. He seemed… rather determined.”

That intrigued me. 

“Determined how exactly?”

“I’m not sure how to explain it… He had a strange look about him. As if he had just made a decision.”

I froze. Whatever Harry was thinking, it could not be good. Could it? Should I keep my hopes up and my fears at bay? Hope was, after all, the only thing left under the circumstances. 

“What time was that?” I asked.

“At about 6am. He didn’t even stay for breakfast.”

I got lost in thoughts of last night and started fretting. It made me leave my toast aside. Astoria seemed sad.

“Oh, aren’t you hungry? I thought for sure this morning would be different...” she said with a wise look.

I frowned. 

“Why would it be any different today?” I challenged like a child.

“Oh, I don’t know. I guess it was just female intuition,” she shrugged. 

Her smile was so innocent it became impossible for me to ask her anything else. It was better this way. I wasn’t prepared to talk about Harry and what had happened. Maybe I never would be. 

“What about the boys?”

“Alfred and Angel are walking with the dogs,” she informed me.

“Do you think it’s prudent? I mean, the house is well-protected, but we never know…” I started worriedly. 

“There’s an Auror with them. Young Grey.”

Right. The quite young and impetuous Hugh Grey. Strong, tall and extremely polite. Grey was the perfect bodyguard. In order not to get in the way of our routine he made himself practically invisible. The boys seemed to like him a lot. Besides, Grey was not aggressive towards me like the others. It was quite a change for an Auror. Even if I still didn’t like their presence in my house, at least Grey wasn’t unpleasant. Also, Harry seemed to trust him completely, after all, he was one of the few chosen to stay here and keep our secret. The other Auror, a woman named Cindy Sinclair, was also quiet and never seemed to judge me. 

I spent the rest of the day wandering around the house, trying unsuccessfully not to think of Harry. I wondered if he would leave to Egypt without me. I was so paranoid that I began to think he had slept with me just to get a sample of my blood. I had no obvious marks, but he could have taken them away using magic. 

My soul was all over the place when I sat by the piano. Even Astoria could not make me calm down. I thought sleeping with Harry at least once would be enough. Yet, I wanted more, so much more. I wanted him all to myself. I loathed Ginny Weasley more than ever before. If Harry, however, had had sex with me with such passion, he could not love her that much, could he? 

I began to play the piano and soon I was in a trance. The gloomy sound surrounded me in a sad embrace. I could feel the sweat in every pore. I should stop, but I could not. As soon as one song ended another began. Each time it got more challenging and demanding. I lost track of time and only stopped when strong hands caught mine. I was so engrossed in the music I had not noticed anyone arriving. I glanced at Harry and his green eyes were uneasy. My heart skipped a beat.

“Self-punishment does not suit you,” he muttered.

I wanted to look away, but I kept staring at him trying to find something that gave me a clue at how he felt about us. Apart from a flicker in his eyes, he seemed aloof. 

“Who said I was punishing myself?” I retorted hoarsely. “It’s just music. Music is good for the soul, isn’t it?” 

His fingertips brushed against my face and I trembled. 

“Perhaps. Yet, you are sweating, but it doesn’t look like you are running a fever.”

“Of course I am not feverish. It’s not the piano that makes me sick.”

“No, it’s magic. And that, Malfoy, makes me wonder how exactly I can take you to Egypt with me when you are in such a state. I do need you, but at what cost?”

Listening to Harry admit he needed me even if it wasn’t exactly the way I wanted him to made my heart race. 

“I’ll be ok,” I whispered.

Neither of us could look away, so we just stared at each other for a really long time. Being prey of his emerald eyes was scary but in a good way. I was afraid of what had been going on in Harry’s head. It seemed so unlike Harry to be swept away by his desires, which could only mean he had been pondering about us for a while, and his needs had become strong enough to make him put his wife aside. It was a crazy idea, but I was full of hope. 

Harry wanted me. That was a fact. There was no way he would tell me since when he had such feelings for me, but what did I care. The biggest problem was Ginny Weasley and where she fit in his life now. I didn’t want to play the jealous lover in the relationship, but I suppose it was too late for that anyway. I must talk about things between us or I would explode.

“About last night…” I started.

“We had sex,” he declared coldly. It was the Chief Auror speaking.

I sighed when I actually wanted to punch him. 

“Did you think I would pretend nothing happened?” he questioned. 

“I honestly don’t know what to think at all.”

“Do you want to pretend nothing happened?” he insisted.

I looked at Harry as if he were a complete stranger.

“What do you want exactly, Potter? Because frankly, I am at a loss here.”

For the first time in my life I saw Harry avoid my eyes as if he were feeling guilty or perhaps shame. Perhaps both. My heart stung. 

“Honestly,” he said staring at his feet. “I don’t know. One thing is for certain, though. This is not the time to talk about this. Even though I won’t deny what came to pass because I’m not a hypocrite, I just can’t deal with it right now. It’s too insane.”

“So what? Don’t you think I deserve to know…?”

“Yes, you do. Whatever it is you think you deserve from me regarding last night, you probably do,” he conveyed, upset. “It wasn’t planned, Malfoy. It just happened. It was… unexpected and... great, but it doesn’t change anything. There are so many things happening right now, and they are so much bigger than us, that I will need time to process this… this thing… between us.”

“What about Ginny Weasley?” I asked feebly as I feared his reaction to that question.

Once more, however, Harry surprised me. There was no anger in his stare or in his voice when he said, “She’s been known as Ginny Potter for quite some time, Malfoy. And if we could just leave her out of this for now, I would appreciate it. Besides, I don’t even know how to look at your wife.”

That made both of us.

“My marriage was set by my parents and Astoria’s. It’s not real. We went along with it because it was better for both us to be together. But we haven’t shared the same bed in a really long time,” I confessed. Harry was the first person I ever told it to, apart from my therapist. I could feel his eyes burning me as I went on, “We’ve tried for a while, thus Scorpius was born. But Astoria and I have always been more friends than lovers.”

There was some relief in letting those words out.

“I…” He seemed so lost I wanted to hug him, but I was so afraid. “I can’t deal with this now, Malfoy.”

I came to stand before him. “What exactly can’t you deal with? You can’t deal with the fact that you want me just as I want you? Is that it?” I pressed on. “Or is there more?”

Please, tell me there is more.

“I told you I won’t deny what happened. And I’ve come to terms with wanting you, sort of. But I cannot deal with the consequences of it all. Not now when there are so many urgent matters to solve!” he exclaimed. 

I sneered.

“Aren’t you grand, Potter? So it is work above all else.”

“Right now, yes, it is. And since this case has everything to do with you, mixing things isn’t helping me think clearly,” he said, frustrated. 

“Ok. Should I wait for the famous line ‘tonight was a mistake’?”

Harry messed his hair even more with his hands. I wish I were brave enough to close the distance between us and kiss him. 

“That’s not… I mean…” he grunted. He didn’t know what to say. I was making him uncomfortable. Well, good. “Dammit, Malfoy! We are both adults, not teenagers. We are both married, with kids, and…”

“And?”

My heart was almost out of my mouth.

“I just can’t do this right now.”

He poured all of his frustration in that single line and I almost came undone. He gave his back to me and headed for the door. His hand was about to turn the knob when he just stopped. His shoulders were evidently stiff. Harry was suffering as much as I. The fact just made me more anxious. If this was a cheap novel, I would run away straight into his arms, tell him how much I loved him and kiss him passionately. In reality, though, I was a coward. My feet were stuck to the floor. I could already predict Harry’s next move. He would leave the Mansion not to come back while I would turn to the piano for solace. 

I was such a Drama King. 

He was the one who surprised me. He came to me, his steps unfaltering and his eyes burning like a lynx’s about to jump on its defenceless prey. He pulled my body towards his like I was made of paper, his arms around me. I moaned even before his lips covered mine in a spectacular kiss. His lips hurt, but what did I care? Mine was just as hungrier for his, giving it as good as it took. My hands clawed his robe to keep his body closer.

I bit his lower lip, then licked and sucked it to keep his taste for as long as possible. Harry sighed sweetly. To my despair, though, he pulled away. 

Nothing else was said. Even if I wanted to, I just couldn’t. Harry seemed to be feeling the same way. We were shaky, conflicted and in pain. When he was finally gone I stood where he left me for Merlin knows how long. I wanted to scream, to break something, to curse. I did none of those things. As a sleepwalker, I walked back to the piano and started playing again. 

Requiem for a Malfoy.


End file.
